To All Of The Husbands And Fathers

Happy Father's Day

This is a special message to the husbands of newly diagnosed bc cancer patients.

This day is always special tom me as I have 2 beautiful daughters. They were ages 5 and 3 when Christine was first DX'ed in 1990. They both are now college students 21, and 19 on their way to building their own futures.

I can still recall the panic that set in when my wife was first diagnosed. How would I care for my daughters? Would I have to raise them alone? Who would teach them in their womanly ways?

Happily to say, I never had to face these challenges. but it took a lot of work.

1. I had to keep my toddlers occupied to take their minds off of their Mom's illness. This took trips to the mall, parks, fishing, the zoo or whatever came to mind.

2. Cooking and helping around the house. When DX'ed, Christine's main job was to concentrate on her illness. The cooking, laundry, food shopping, homework was mostly left up to me.

3. Education. I learned as much as possible about breast cancer and its treatments when it came to Chris's diagnosis. I only learned what was necessary in her case. Ask me anything about HER2- patients and I couldn't help you, but HER2 + is a different story.

4. Whenever possible, we planned family events. Went to Disneyworld, Universal Studios, Hershey Park, etc. We never missed a vacation.

We have a limited supply of books available "Breast Cancer Strategies for Husbands to Support Their Wives" by Jim Eckmann. The books are free, but we need $5.00 for postage. Email me if you want one.

As a result, we were both successful. Not only did our family mature, but our marriage became stronger. We celebrated 22 years on June 4, 2005 and am sending an open invitation to everyone when we renew our vows 3 years from now.

Warmest Regards to All.

Joe

MY husband Joe has been the most wonderful supporter through my brain metastic recurrent disease and recovery back in 1999. It was quite an ordeal for the four of us, not having a clue what to do. My 2 girls were then 13 and 15, knowing this was a repeat performance of the same cancer dxed in '90 when they were 4 and 6. My husband quickly got their mania under contol and was instrumental in keeping them busy at home, while I persued researching and getting the info I needed to become a survivor. Joe, taught me how to seek out my HER2 breast cancer that was not very well documented at that time. The on-line message was '' with her2 dx a 2 year survival at best". Because of my husbamds support for both me and our 2 girls, I was very self-assured that I can FOCUS on beating this BEAST and readied myself for the fight.
My family became less of a concern with Joe's at my side, realizing my quest to survive; being a missing mother and wife was absolutely not on my agenda . Joe became a well informed HER2 avocate and as a result of his expert computer skills helped me put together the Her2 support group website after I succeeded my mission and became NED in 2001. We lauched this site on Dec 24, 2001.
HER2support.org has become the most invaluable informational site for our HER2 comunity of breast cancer patients from stages 1 to 4., with brain metastasis dx and tx's.
This is my thanks to you Joe on Father's DAY, my love, Christine

Dear Joe and Christine,
Thank you so much for sharing your experiences and successes! You've benefitted so many people by creating this website and spreading the knowlege and courage to fight our diseases. It's heart warming to know that in spite of the stress of dealing with a life threatening illness you could have a successful marriage and raise two daughters. Awesome!!!!!
Thank you again for all your hard work and dedication to keeping this website going. It's a treasure and life saver!
Margaret

To Joe,
I keep telling Joe that he is married to a Saint.
Thanks for thinking about all us guys but the real heroes are the ladies who show more courage than I can ever imagine. Without their courage, us guys would never make it through the day!
Al

When my wife was diagnosed with bc I felt as powerless and defencless as it is possible to feel. She was scared, I was scared, we were both scared for each other and the children.

Like most people these days you we looked to the web for more information - and as most of you have discovered, the topic of HER2+ bc is not a subject where you find a great deal of cheery news or comfort.

Then we found this site. It offers common sense, sharing of intelligence and good interpretation of what is happening in the wider world. And yes, the comfort of hearing (or reading) the voices of other people who are going through the same highs and lows.

When people say this site saves lives, they're not wrong.

I don't know if the shared experience of going through bc has made me a better man, but it has certainly made me a wiser one. My wife is an amazing woman whose strength in facing this terrible disease is even more amazing.

Thanks for setting up this site. Thanks to everyone for keeping it going.

Happy father's day to all of us.

Joe and Christine,
I am glad you two found one another. You are both extraordinary people who have made a difference in so many of our lives. And most of all you offer us hope. Only because I found this site did I begin Herceptin. You both changed my life.

Happy father's Day Joe! What an amazing man you are. Thank you for all you do!

Hi Joe-Happy Father's Day to you and all the other dads out there! What a fabulous job you have done with your kids and you have done so much to help your wife and also the rest of us.When the chips are down, the real leaders emerge and step up to the plate.Thank you for all your hard work and for helping us at a time in our lives when we really need a helping hand, someone to share information with us and helping us discover friends that really understand what we are experiencing. May God Bless You and Your Whole Family- Cathy