How can I look more appealing??depressed kat

[Patty H]

I think the cancer really changed me. They took my hair and breast! So I went out and bought big ear rings and 2 wigs. Even now that my hair has grown back, I never leave the house without make up and my ear rings. I was never that type before, but I work hard at not looking sick. I have more clothes now then when I worked and needed them. If I wake up and feel like I have nothing to wear, I go shopping. I always tell my hubby that I'm not leaving our money for his new wife. (just kidding ) I think looking death in the eyes made me decide to do what I want now. To look healthy and alive makes me feel that way too.
Patty H

[al from Canada]

Kat,

Everyone has said it all...especially the part about feeling sexy = attracting sexy husbands. That said, it is also well documented that in most cases, BC will change your sex life.

Here's food for thought, from a male perspective. Remember when you fell in love and everything was a rush? There was so much "ka-bam" back then that I doubt if he would have noticed a missing breast... I know I wouldn't have. You were sexy, not only because you felt sexy (I'm trying to be polite here but think of synonyms for sexy) but also because you were given the permissions to feel that way. Get the ball (yikes) rolling, and get buy-in to go to the next level, which isn't hard to do, (yikes again).

Again, not to be condescending to my male brothers but when you stip away all the layres, walls and posturing; create the setting and his brains will drop down to below his belly button.

How's that for a tactful reply?
Al

[mamacze]

Hi Kat!
I agree with Astrid, sex is a head game. Decide in your head how you want it to be; then get that sexy black night gown ... and do what your head tells you will be fun. You'll find that once you get started your heart will follow and before you know it, you will be feeling like your old self. Sometimes it is that getting started part that is tough. But look at you; gutsy enough to discuss it with us; going after your hubby should be a cinch! (especially with a name like "Kat"!)
love Kim from CT

[Tom]

Dear Kat,

I think that if I didn't have Mom to take care of, I might just take you up on your generous offer. Although the idea of your husband driving us to the airport makes me a littlw squirrely about the plan...lol.

Seriously, I hope things are working out for you and that others are feeling a bit more "frisky" after some consideration of your feelings.

I'm sure that these things are difficult for all involved. I always suggest that they try to imagine themselves in the same situation. It's not easy to visualize, but it can be done. That usually prompts more thoughtfulness on everyone's part.

At any rate, I'm glad you have a place to flop if you're in Paris. Must be nice to know if things don't work out at home...lol

Je te souhaite tout meilleur avec votre sante !

Sincerement,
Tom

[kat in the delta]

Merci beaucoup, Tom!!! ET Toute les monde pour les repondes. Ta Amie, Kat in the delta

[jag]

I F After All You Been Through Your Husband Makes You Feel Unattractive Then He Doesnt Deserve You... To Me Love Is From The Heart...i Would Be Thanking God That I Still Had My Wife After All You And All These Ladies Go Through....and I Would Being Doing All I Could To Help Her.....like Tom I Search Every Day To Find Things To Help My Mom Stay Well....happy....and With Me For Hopefully Many Years To Come.....you Are A Fighter....a Survivour....and Someone Who Should Hold Your Head High....

[Ginagce]

Great answers from the men don't you think? Right on!

I'm a mess right now after bilaterals, chemo, herceptin, arimidex, back surgery, etc. etc. you know the rest.

But you know what, I can feel as sexy as I did before all this crap happened by simply pulling my hair up and putting on a pair of fun earrings!

I know this is a truly superficial response but you know what, sometimes cancer calls for some superficial thinking just to get you through!

I prefer the dangly kind myself! In silver!

Best to you Kat, you are a beautiful woman, we all are!

ginagce