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01-04-2012, 07:07 PM
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#1
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Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 415
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Always remember gratitude...
"Gratitude requires us to stay in the now. Fear is living in the future. That’s why gratitude and fear cannot coexist. If you fill yourself with gratitude you will notice that your anxious thoughts and fear dissolve."
I've held this quote close to me for all these years on this bumpy ~10yr journey.
So, as I celebrate my birthday tonight-in disbelief that I'm FORTYTHREE and gratitude that I'm 43!- and wait the long 12hours before I see my doc in the morning and get my scan results, I focus my heart & thoughts on all there is in my life to be thankful for.
Most especially my family, which includes you guys.
There is no pill, no cocktail, no quart of ice cream that will help effectively distract me through these next few fretful hours, waiting to see which way my path will take me, full speed ahead or maneuvering choppy waves again.
But again, if I focus my heart and throughts on gratitude, I just might get a restful nights sleep, ready to face another day, surviving another day with cancer, continuing to beat the odds.
Keep the Faith~
Jessica
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01-04-2012, 07:16 PM
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#2
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Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 1,477
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Re: Always remember gratitude...
Jessica,
Thank you for your beautiful post and happy birthday ! ! !
I can't tell you how much I needed to read your quote tonight (so true about fear). You are very inspirational and we all need to try hard to Keep the Faith. Get some rest.
Karen
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01-04-2012, 07:52 PM
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#3
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Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Thornhill Ontario
Canada
Posts: 266
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Re: Always remember gratitude...
Jessica Those are very heartfelt and inspiring words...thinking of you and wishing you
a happy birthday. We just need to keep going forward, I really wish you calmness and strength you do have an amazing attitude. Lois
__________________
August 2008
Lumpectomy left breast
1 tumour 0.9 cm
Her2 negative
lymph nodes negative
venous/lymphatic invasion absent
ER+PR-
Stage I Grade 2
Radiation and Femara
November 2008
Lumpectomy right breast
2 tumours .03 cm and .05 cm and extensive DCIS
.05 tumour Her2+
lymph node negative
venous/lymphatic invasion "indeterminate"
ER+PR low postive
Stage 1 Grade 2
January 2009
bilateral mastectomy
chemotherapy taxotere
Herceptin one year
Femara
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01-04-2012, 08:23 PM
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#4
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Colorado Springs, CO
Posts: 430
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Re: Always remember gratitude...
Jessica,
°´`°¤,¸.•*´¯)¯`*•.¸,¤°´`°¤,¸.†¢*´¯)(¯`*•.¸,¤
╔Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨Ʒ♥ •.¸¸.•´¯`•.♥ Today is your BIRTHDAY .♥.•´¯`•.¸¸.•
║║╔═╦╦╦═╗♪♫•.¸¸.•´¯`•.♥ •´¯`•.¸¸.•♪♫♪•.¸¸.•´¯`•.♥
║╚╣║║║║╩╣ ♥♫•´¯`•.♥.♫ May all your dreams come true... ♫
╚═╩═╩═╩Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ•.¸¸....•´¯`•♥•.¸¸.†¢Â´Â¯`•.♥ Peace ♫ Love ♫ Joy ¨¯`♥
I'm sending you special Birthday wishes! I'll be praying for a peaceful night of sleep for you tonight. Thanks for your inspirational post!
~Alice
__________________
9/15/08 (age 52) - Mammo: calcifications
9/22/08 - Biopsy: DCIS, grade 3. ER,PR status: Pos. in 75-90% of tumor cells.
10/01/08 - Ob/Gyn appt.: found complex, mostly cystic mass on right ovary - 11cmx12cmx 8cm
10/15/08 - Hysterectomy & Oophorectomy, Lumpectomy: Cyst on uterus, not ovary - all was benign. Breast - 5 of 6 bad margins. 2 Sentinel Lymph nodes removed, both negative. Stage 0, Tis, N0
12/11/08 - Mastectomy & DIEP reconstruction: Surprise! 2 cm Invasive DC, grade 2 found. One benign internal mammary lymph node. Stage 1, T1c, N0, all clean margins. ER+ (Proportion Score = 2/5, Intensity Score = 2/3) and PR+(Proportion Score = 3/5, Intensity Score = 2/3)
HER2 score = 3+
1/09/09 - Oncotype DX: Recurrence S/core of 60 !?!?! ER status is NEG!! PR staus is NEG! HER2 score = 12.2 (still positive, greater than 11.5 is positive).
1/20/09 - Started chemo: TCH
5/26/09 - FINISHED CHEMO!
1/05/10 - FINISHED HERCEPTIN!
1/22/10 - Port-a-catheter removed!
3/07/18 - Still NED
9/10/23 - Still NED
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01-04-2012, 08:25 PM
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#5
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Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Misty woods of WA State
Posts: 4,128
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Re: Always remember gratitude...
Dear Jessica -
Happy Birthday to you - now that it is late in the evening your time. Hope you were able to have a little fun in spite of the big appointment in the morning.
Thanks for sharing your secret for getting through the bumps in your road. This is excellent and heartfelt advice.
Lots of love & CHEERS!
__________________
"When I hear music, I fear no danger. I am invulnerable. I see no foe. I am related to the earliest times, and to the latest." H.D. Thoreau
Live in the moment.
MY STORY SO FAR ~~~~
Found suspicious lump 9/2000
Lumpectomy, then node dissection and port placement
Stage IIB, 8 pos nodes of 18, Grade 3, ER & PR -
Adriamycin 12 weekly, taxotere 4 rounds
36 rads - very little burning
3 mos after rads liver full of tumors, Stage IV Jan 2002, one spot on sternum
Weekly Taxol, Navelbine, Herceptin for 27 rounds to NED!
2003 & 2004 no active disease - 3 weekly Herceptin + Zometa
Jan 2005 two mets to brain - Gamma Knife on Jan 18
All clear until treated cerebellum spot showing activity on Jan 2006 brain MRI & brain PET
Brain surgery on Feb 9, 2006 - no cancer, 100% radiation necrosis - tumor was still dying
Continue as NED while on Herceptin & quarterly Zometa
Fall-2006 - off Zometa - watching one small brain spot (scar?)
2007 - spot/scar in brain stable - finished anticoagulation therapy for clot along my port-a-catheter - 3 angioplasties to unblock vena cava
2008 - Brain and body still NED! Port removed and scans in Dec.
Dec 2008 - stop Herceptin - Vaccine Trial at U of W begun in Oct. of 2011
STILL NED everywhere in Feb 2014 - on wing & prayer
7/14 - Started twice yearly Zometa for my bones
Jan. 2015 checkup still shows NED
2015 Neuropathy in feet - otherwise all OK - still NED.
Same news for 2016 and all of 2017.
Nov of 2017 - had small skin cancer removed from my face. Will have Zometa end of Jan. 2018.
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01-04-2012, 08:49 PM
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#6
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Senior Member
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 3,142
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Re: Always remember gratitude...
Happy Birthday. I wish you fun on your birthday, a good night's sleep and a good report from the doc tomorrow.
Yes. It is important to be thankful for what we have, including life on earth with all its ups and downs.
I was just telling someone today that I am grateful for the 13 years I have had thanks to her2 therapies since my diagnosis. Yes. This week I offically celebrate 13 years. I need to change my link to 13 years and still counting I guess.
Enjoy your birthday !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Many more years to you !!!!!!!!!! Blessings of peace and good health to you.
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01-04-2012, 09:08 PM
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#7
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Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Port Hedland, Australia
Posts: 382
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Re: Always remember gratitude...
Happy Birthday to you Jessica and thank you very much for sharing, I hope tomorrow brings good news your way xx
__________________
Diagnosed Nov '10 IDC whilst pregnant with 2nd child
Her 2 ++ ER/PR + but weak and patchy 50% + 5%
Left mastectomy Dec '10, 6cm tumour 1 of 2 lymph (micro mets)
Clear margins but lymphovasculer invasion
Stage 3a Grade 3
Fec 100 x 3 Jan '11 Taxotere X 3 and Herceptin X 1yr
Staging scans - CT brain & body and bone - May '11 - NED!!
Start Femara - in chemo induced menapause
25 Rads June '11
Dec '11 Menstruation resumed - zoladex inj monthly and Tamoxifen
Feb '12 Back on Femera and Zoladex
March '12 CT brain & body & bone scan all clear
Zometa x2/yearly
April '12 - Oopherectomy
Praying the Herceptin is as good as its hype!!
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01-04-2012, 11:57 PM
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#8
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Senior Member
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 88
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Re: Always remember gratitude...
Hey Jessica -
You are AMAZING! Happy Birthday - what a SUPER special birthday this is! I just have so much hope that if you've made it this long, and w/all the new therapies, odds are in your favor.
Hugs,
Kim
__________________
------------------------------
Dx Stage 3C 2005, triple +, tons of lymph nodes as well. FEC, surgery, TCH, rads, herceptin 1 year. And, Aromasin.
2007 - recurrence to medistinal lymph node, Abraxene and Herceptin - took it down 50%
2008 - on Arimidex/Herceptin - stable lymph node.
2009 - stable on Arimidex/Herceptin
2010 - lymph node progression and liver mets.
2010 - went on Gemzar, Navelbine, Herceptin - Navelbine and Herceptin took liver mets down. lymph node slightly progressed.
2010 - did Xeloda & Tykerb - MAJOR progression in liver in only 6 weeks.
Dec 2010 - present - Ixempra/Avastin/Herceptin/Fasoldex - regressing
June 2012 - chemo break
Sept 19, 2012 - start t-dm1. Chose this over going back on Ixempra.
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01-05-2012, 12:20 AM
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#9
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Senior Member
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Geelong, Australia
Posts: 250
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Re: Always remember gratitude...
Wow, that was a beautiful post, thank you. Happy birthday, and good luck with your scans.
Dawn
__________________
Dx May 27 2011, age 43
Stage 1V 3.6cm breast lump, spot on lungs, nodes chest + neck
HER2+ ER/PR-
Abraxane weekly - 16 weeks
Herceptin every third week
September 26 2011 N.E.D!
Herceptin ongoing
8th Dec 2011 Brain MRI - clear
20th Dec 2011 bone/cat scan clear still NED
April 2012 scans show axillary node lump - ? what to do...
June 2012 Axillary node dissection 1/11 nodes affected, a wide local excision shows DCIS. Now what to do again? Watch and scan 3 monthly
April 2013, two spots in nodes to chest wall, start TDM1 (Kadcycla) as part of clinical trial
July 2013 stable
Oct 2013 progression off TDM-1 (Kadcycla)
Nov 2013 radiation to lymph nodes in sternum
Dec 2013. Mastectomy right side, pathology shows tumour was HER-2 negative, no wonder TDM-1 (Kadcycla) didn’t work!
April 2014 NED. On Herceptin only
August 2014 NED. On Herceptin only
March 2015. NED. On Herceptin only
September 2015 NED on Herceptin only
March 2016. Pulmonary embolism, Clexane injections daily forever. Still NED On Herceptin only
Nov 2016. Bone Mets in ribs - Radiation. Don’t know if bone Mets are er-/pr-/HER2+ or triple negative.
Can’t give self injections on to tablets (Xarelto) for blood clots.
2017 NED - On Herceptin only
2018 NED - On Herceptin only
2019 NED - On Herceptin only
2020 NED - On Herceptin only
2021 NED - On Herceptin only
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01-05-2012, 01:22 AM
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#10
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: "Love never fails."
Posts: 5,808
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Re: Always remember gratitude...
Love it!
Happy Birthday!
__________________
Jackie07
http://www.kevinmd.com/blog/2011/06/doctors-letter-patient-newly-diagnosed-cancer.html
http://www.asco.org/ASCOv2/MultiMedi...=114&trackID=2
NICU 4.4 LB
Erythema Nodosum 85
Life-long Central Neurocytoma 4x5x6.5 cm 23 hrs 62090 semi-coma 10 d PT OT ST 30 d
3 Infertility tmts 99 > 3 u. fibroids > Pills
CN 3 GKRS 52301
IDC 1.2 cm Her2 +++ ER 5% R. Lmptmy SLNB+1 71703 6 FEC 33 R Tamoxifen
Recc IIB 2.5 cm Bi-L Mast 61407 2/9 nds PET
6 TCH Cellulitis - Lymphedema - compression sleeve & glove
H w x 4 MUGA 51 D, J 49 M
Diastasis recti
Tamoxifen B. scan
Irrtbl bowel 1'09
Colonoscopy 313
BRCA1 V1247I
hptc hemangioma
Vertigo
GI - > yogurt
hysterectomy/oophorectomy 011410
Exemestane 25 mg tab 102912 ~ 101016 stopped due to r. hip/l.thigh pain after long walk
DEXA 1/13
1-2016 lesions in liver largest 9mm & 1.3 cm onco. says not cancer.
3-11 Appendectomy - visually O.K., a lot of puss. Final path result - not cancer.
Start Vitamin D3 and Calcium supplement (600mg x2)
10-10 Stopped Exemestane due to r. hip/l.thigh pain OKed by Onco 11-08-2016
7-23-2018 9 mm groundglass nodule within the right lower lobe with indolent behavior. Due to possible adenocarcinoma, Recommend annual surveilence.
7-10-2019 CT to check lung nodule.
1-10-2020 8mm stable nodule on R Lung, two 6mm new ones on L Lung, a possible lymph node involvement in inter fissule.
"I WANT TO BE AN OUTRAGEOUS OLD WOMAN WHO NEVER GETS CALLED AN OLD LADY. I WANT TO GET SHARP EDGED & EARTH COLORED, TILL I FADE AWAY FROM PURE JOY." Irene from Tampa
Advocacy is a passion .. not a pastime - Joe
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01-05-2012, 04:01 AM
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#11
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Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 1,526
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Re: Always remember gratitude...
Happy birthday Jessica, you are one inspiring lady. I am sending hope and prayers that your scans bring good news.
Ellie
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01-06-2012, 09:54 PM
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#12
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Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Mountains of Virginia
Posts: 2,267
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Re: Always remember gratitude...
Got you on my mind and in my prayers Jessica. Birthday wishes!
__________________
Rhonda (Sassy)
dx age 45
DX 2/15/05 Stage IIb (at surgery)restaged IIIa
Left mast .9cm tumor 5 of 14 nodes
Triple Positive
4 DD A/C
12 Taxol/Herceptin
33Rads
Strange infect mast site one year aft surg, hosp 1 wk
Herceptin for total of 18 months
Lupron Monthly 4 yrs
Neurontin for aches, pains and hot flashes(It works!)
Ovaries removed 11/09 stop Lupron and Neurontin
Arimidex 6 yrs (tried Femara, no SE improvement)
Tried Exemestane-hips got so bad could hardly walk
Back to Arimidex for year seven
Zometa 2X Annual for 7years, Lasix
Stop Arimidex 5/13
Stop Zometa 7/13-Bi-lateral Stress Fractures in Femurs from Zometa
5/14 Start Tamoxifen
3/15 Stem cell transplant to stimulate femur bone growth/healing
5/15 Complete fracture of right femur/Titanium rods both femurs
9/16 Start Evista stopTamoxifen
3/17 Stop Evista--unwelcome side effects!
NED and no meds.......
14YEARS NED!
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01-06-2012, 10:34 PM
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#13
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Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 14
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Re: Always remember gratitude...
I'm new on here - we are fellow Capricorns, my birthday is tomorrow. Your words are comforting, I will remember them next week as I go for my scan results too. I'll say a prayer for you tonight and I hope you have a happy birthday and many, many more. God bless!
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01-07-2012, 02:25 PM
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#14
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Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Ireland
Posts: 3,463
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Re: Always remember gratitude...
Sorry I'm late Jessica but belated Happy birthday and loved your post!!!
Welcome Mollecat and a belated Birthday greeting to you also!!!! xx
__________________
Tricia
Dx July '05 IDC 1.9cm Triple positive 3/9 nodes positive
A/C X 4 ..Taxol/Herceptin x 12 wks then herceptin 1 yr
Rads x 36 ..oophorectomy August '06
Currently taking Arimidex..
June 2011 osteopenia/ zometa x1 yearly- stopped Zometa 2015 as Dexa show normal bone density.
Stopped Arimidex July 2014- Restarted Arimidex 2015 for a further two years on the advice of my Onc.
2014 Normal Dexa scan
2018 Mammo all clear, still NED!
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01-08-2012, 05:08 AM
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#15
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Senior Member
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 3,154
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Re: Always remember gratitude...
I am late on this thread also!
Sending you belated but huge Birthday Wishes!
Used to be a time when we gals would have a birthday and feel ugh, another year older .....Now we all are joyful to say another year older
Hope all went well with your onc. visit.
Hugs,
Jean
__________________
Stage 1, Grade 1, 3/30/05
Lumpectomy 4/15/05 - 6MM IDC
Node Neg. (Sentinel node)
ER+ 90% / PR-, Her2+++ by FISH
Ki-67 40%
Arimidex 5/05
Radiation 32 trt, 5/30/05
Oncotype DX test 4/17/06, 31% high risk
TOPO 11 neg. 4/06
Stopped Arimidex 5/06
TCH 5/06, 6 treatments
Herceptin 5/06 - for 1 yr.
9/06 Completed chemo
Started Femara Sept. 2006
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