Living while waiting... An art form

[Andrea Barnett Budin]

marilyn, i just had to say -- speaking of miracles -- you are totally awesome! You have achieved remarkable goals. Enjoy your beautiful family. How blessed you are. You have drawn these joyful happenings to you with the power of your radiant spirit. I am very impressed. People like you keep us strong and full of infinite possibilities.

harrie in hawaii, you too are so special. I love the way you are so open to being joyful and in the moment!!

this site is so full of radiant souls. I truly enjoy connecting with you all.

there's some great and uplifting info in this thread. Hoping to draw a few more to take the time to feed their spirit.

we each carry messages for one another.

love hearing your feedback. Thank you every one...

[PinkGirl]

I'm enjoying this thread ... thanks for starting it AndiBB.

This is making me wonder why we have to be "brought back" to this
place of understanding ... why do we have to be reminded to live in
the now, cherish every moment etc. etc.?

Many moons ago I read MaryAnne Williamson's book explaining The
Course In Miracles. She talked about letting go of everything ... handing
it all over to a higher power ... she said that people were willing to do that
except they don't want to hand over the really important stuff ... they
want to hang onto that and deal with it themselves.

Why are we so resistant to this ... even you wrote that after your scare
with your tumour markers going up, you appreciated each day more .... so
why do we need reminders???? I have a feeling that you're going to blame
this on the ego!!! Hope this makes sense.

[Andrea Barnett Budin]

Hi Pink!

Thanks for coming out of THINGS TO THINK ABOUT OTHER THAN BREAST CANCER -- way over here. I am teasing you, my sweet friend.

I recall, back in '77, my father died suddenly. Well he had been very sick for several years, but I think death is always so stunning that we feel like it is sudden.

Anyway, I lived on Long Island at the time. At the very start of the winter the dark brown paint on the front door of my house chipped. It was ugly. And the first thing I saw as I came and went (as a busy mom with a 7 and 9 yr old). Darn that nasty chipped paint, right in my face! Everyday. It annoyed the heck out of me. Adding insult to injury, I was informed that I had to wait till spring to repaint and repair. DRAT. I was ever frustrated by this untidy matter.

Then my dad died, and as I would walk into my house I noted that the chipped paint meant not a whit, in the scheme of things. I no longer cared. My Father was gone from this earth. I missed him. This was a matter of importance, not the other thing. I held on to that wisdom (guess kind of like not sweating the small stuff) for a long while. Slowly, it began to slip away.

I agree Pink One, why do we need constant reminding of Life Lessons? Geez. In the same life yet!

Bc of course kind of brought me back to earth, so to speak. And, then the recurrence further etched Lessons into my brain and my heart. Plus, as you say, my tumor marker issue created a total resurgence of my need to celebrate each day. I was kind of doing that, but it was also kind of slipping away. I AM PRESENT NOW! I AM BACK! HELLO *NOW*!!!!!!

I will ponder this and get back to you on why it is we don't hold on to the Lessons for longer. Any suggestions??? Anyone????? Good topic. Interesting. I think...

Hey Steph -- over there in LIVING WHILE WAITING, ME TOO -- you'd be perfect (if you can find the time pre travel) to offer some outlook on this issue. You being newly freed and on hiatus from Vit H and all...

Have a fab trip, BTW. It's sounds divine!

[Jackie07]

Reading the messages on this thread reminded me of the 'here and now' that was emphasized by the popular 'transaction analysis' in the 70's and 80's. Did a web search and found a lot of information about TA, including these interesting initialisms:

YDYB: Why Don't You, Yes But. Historically, the first game discovered.

IFWY: If It Weren't For You

WAHM: Why does this Always Happen to Me? (setting up a self-fulfilling prophecy)

SWYMD: See What You Made Me Do

UGMIT: You Got Me Into This

LHIT: Look How Hard I've Tried

ITHY: I'm Only Trying to Help You

LYAHF: Let's You and Him Fight (staging a love triangle)

NIGYYSOB / NIGYSOB: Now I've Got You, You Son Of a Bitch

RAPO: A woman falsely cries 'rape' or threatens to - related to Buzz Off Buster

[Andrea Barnett Budin]

Thanks Jackie for your input.

I kind of get your point, maybe... Surely I can relate to the WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING TO ME syndrome which is a red flag -- to be more introspective and examine what the heck I am doing wrong. It's human to make mistakes but the true crime is not to learn from them, and to keep repeating them.

I think the profound Lesson of grasping our need to CHERISH EACH DAY AND THOSE WE LOVE, AND TO DO IT WITH UNCOMMON PASSION has so many layers. Like falling in love, in time we still love the person but we aren't all atitter about it as we are when it is freshly discovered. I may have made that word up. Could be atwitter, but you catch my drift.

So as life has a way of moving like a roller coaster, when we have a crisis, we RELEARN this invaluable Lesson, as it has even deeper meaning. Over time, we become lax in being awestruck and humbly grateful. Life has a way of reminding us, which is a good system I suppose.

That's my take.

The SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO is emblematic of abusers, I've noted. It's never their fault. If it weren't for you, my sad story, my victimization -- then Life would be good. Blaming rather than taking responsibility, not only for the past but for taking charge of your future is self-defeating!

One of my favorite Gleanings is -- I CAN CONTROL MY THOUGHTS. THEY CONTROL MY EMOTIONS, SO I CAN CONTROL MY EMOTIONS. I MUST CONSCIOUSLY ACCEPT MY POWER OF CHOICE AND REWRITE MY MENTAL CHATTERINGS.

I CAN CALL MY DESIRED DESTINY TO ME WITH MY CHOSEN THOUGHTS, ATTRACTING THE UNIVERSE TO MATCH MY POSITIVE ENERGY AND ASSIST ME. I CAN COMMAND MY BODY. AND I AM EVER GRATEFUL FOR THIS GOD-GIVEN BIRTHRIGHT! WE ARE EACH SO VERY BLESSED, WE HAVE ONLY TO RECOGNIZE AND CLAIM OUR EMPOWERMENT...

[PinkGirl]

Hey AndiBB ... my pal ... my steady girl ...

This discussion keeps making me think of all of the stuff I've read about
the "ego" .... and that always confuses me because it's a concept that is
difficult for me to wrap my head around .... but Jackie's list sure sounds
like the "meanie voice".

Could this be one of the reasons why it is so difficult to stay in the "now"?
Because the ego keeps dragging us out of it .... it was your ego telling you
that you had to get rid of the chipped brown paint ... because having messy
paint around your door said that you were less of a person ????? And when
you have some kind of a crisis going on, you don't give a poop about chipped paint ....

So it seems to me that we need some kind of crisis to remind us to stay in
the Now and to cherish every moment ... the key is to find a way to live this
way when we're not having a crisis .......... I think it's also about "attachment to things" .... things don't matter when we are facing our
mortality .... when we're not doing that, things matter ........ just some of my ramblings for you my AndiBB .........

[StephN]

Good discussion.

What keeps coming to mind is the Old Saw: "You can't take it with you."

There is more, but I need to go take hubby to get his leg checked at the hospital now. later.