Why do I want to quit now?

[danceswithrain]

I feel better just since posting. Your right Rhonda it is a line! There have been so many great suggestions and just support here it helps to know your not alone. And I have felt that way for quite some time. The worst part of depression is just trying to do the things you need to do to get better instead of just crawling in a hole somewhere. It is also hard to let anyone know just how rough of shape I'm in. I've been 'sucking it up' for my family, my employer, my neighbors since I was diagnosed for fear of being critisized or seen as unable to do my job. Running hard, still trying to be the tough girl I guess. It is hard to reach out. Thank you all!
Nice to hear from you again my old friend 'alaska angel'

[Sheila]

Dances with rain
Love the name...since I am part Cherokee, I wonder what mine would be....yours is very peaceful, takes me to a childhood time when you would see a storm coming and go out and feel each raindrop hit your skin and cool you. Sometimes I think we expect so much from life itself, we need to return to our beginnings to see where we are meant to go...to much simpler times to handle the more difficult ones....to acknowledge this issues you face is the most important part...take one thing at a time, don't overwhelm your self, you will defeat the goal...start each day with the thought of one thing you will be thankful for that day....and one thing you will not let burden you....it took a long time from you to get a handle on this disease, and now it takes time to get some normalcy back....life will be ever changing, and we are here with you on this journey....as Sassy said, "we have your back"
Much love and peace
Sheila

[chrisy]

Vickie,
I'm with PatB - it is very common to get post traumatic stress after "finishing" with cancer. For so long, chemo, surgery, sometimes radiation, herceptin, you are so focused on pushing through it and being strong you put a lot of the emotional stuff on the back burner. Then wham - it comes at you out of nowhere.

At least that was what happened to me after my initial diagnosis and treatment. I thought I was done and should be feeling terrific but I found myself just crying at inappropriate times for no reason at all. I had read about post traumatic stress reaction after cancer treatment but it took me a while to recognize it.

Hang in there, be gentle with yourself and realize it may take some time. Get whatever help you need along the way.

And yes, we are all in line to support and love you.

Chris