Wind knocked out of my sails

[nitewind]

That's the only way I can describe it. I went to the onc yesterday for my herceptin infusion. He examined me and said he wants to get an echo done on my heart. Ok, no problem, I simply ask him if it will be okay for me to miss two herceptin treatments. His answer " I don't know if it will hurt you to miss any treatments, I don't know if it will help you to have these treatments, I can't guarantee you anything". Okay, I know that there are no guarantees for anything to do with cancer, but he really knocked the wind out of me with that statement. I've been trying to stay so upbeat and feel positive. This statement really did a job on me, I've been really down since yesterday thinking, what's the point of having all this done, then? Don't know if he was having a bad day or not but he sure ruined mine, I thought it was so inappropriate. I'm set up for a scope and a colonoscopy on Monday and I'm sitting here wondering "what's the point"?