DianneS: choices after mastectomy

[Debbie L.]

Hi DianneS,

I started a new thread for this (from your question to Catherine in her quarterly scan thread).

I basically agree exactly with Catherine. This is an individual decision with no single right answer. In fact with MANY right answers, as nowadays there are so many choices.

The only people that I know who are unhappy with their choice of reconstruction are a few who now feel they were rushed into immediate reconstruction, making that decision in the heat of a cancer diagnosis and not giving it the separate attention it needed. But that's only a few, out of the many who are quite happy with their choice to reconstruct. I would say that the women I know who are happiest with their choice to reconstruct are the ones who did wait a few years (or more).

I had bilateral mastectomies without reconstruction, thinking that I'd decide what to do later. At first of course, it felt very weird and obvious. But for me, the prostheses made me feel even more weird and obvious (not to mention uncomfortable) so I never wore them. Over time, I got used to being flat and do not really thing about it much anymore, unless trying on clothing that fits badly. I don't think that people notice nearly as much as we think they do.

So that's worked fine for me. I'm glad to be here and to have reasonably normal use of my body. I do miss my breasts, of course. But getting them back was not the offer on the table and for me, it seemed like reconstruction would feel much like wearing prostheses, just more permanent and convenient. Which is a perfectly good thing, if that's what you want.

I think that if I felt that I needed to wear prostheses, I'd be thinking seriously about reconstruction. Prostheses are a pain.

You can probably find other opinions and ideas by searching "reconstruction" in the search options. Or maybe others will chime in here. Again, only you can decide what's right for you, but it does help to hear the reasoning we all used in making our decisions.

[Mary L]

I found a very lightweight silicone prosthesis that you don't even feel like you are wearing it. The one thing that bothers me is my remaining right breast seems to keep changing size, due to my age, and I have to get a new prosthesis. My insurance pays for a new one every year. It works for me. Mary L

[Catherine]

Regarding the prosthesis. I guess I have just gotten used to wearing them like a piece of clothing. Yes, I am happy to take my bra off in the evening. But most of the time, I forget that I am wearing them. When I am really tired, it all feels a little tight. This alternative works for me. Thanks to Debbie for starting a new thread on this issue.

Catherine

[Chelee]

Reconstruction was never brought up to me when I was dx? It wasn't till about two months after finishing my 6th cycle of TCH that I realized I was never given the option of recon. I probably would of went with immediate recon at that time so that I could of got it all done at the same time. By the time I found out someone should of mentioned it to me it was too late. I had enough surgeries and couldn't stand the thought of one more. So I let it go.

I didn't care for the first prothesis I had...they felt awful and kept creeping up till they were under my chin... that looked really nice. lol Or one high and the other one low. Totally lopsided. Ha! I was constantly pulling them down all day. (Very annoying.) Then I found the weighted prothesis and those have been great for me. Love them. Since their weighted they stay put...never move up...and I don't even notice them once my bra is in place. The weighted ones for me are very comfortable. My insurance company will pay for a new pair each yr and 3 new bra's...so that's not too bad.

Chelee

[mmoons]

Hi !

I have been terrible about checking in. Sending my love to all of you.

Here is a site that I found helpful:

http://www.breastfree.org/viewer.php?num=2

I did not reconstruct and RARELY wear my uncomfortable prosthesis. People don't notice....I am sure of it. Like Debbie, I felt like it was obvious but now I am totally comfortable. Sometimes I even wear t-shirts WITHOUT putting my new twins into the torture bra and strapping it on. LOL

Very personal decision, as others said. VERY personal. I had people from nurses to friends to family offer advice and try to convince me that I was too young to not reconstruct. I went with my heart and for me it was perfect to have the double mastectomy and be done with surgeries.

HUGS and love to you all!

Maureen

[Mary L]

Maureen, you have a great attitude. I wanted them to take both of my breasts but my insurance would not pay for a nondiseased removal. I wear a lightweight prosthesis when I go out but that's it. I never wear in at home or in my yard. Mary L