Edwards: Less help than a girl needs

karen z · 08-11-2008, 12:06 AM

In a NY TImes article today Dowd states that......."the creepiest part of Edwards' creepy confession was when he stressed to Woodruff that he cheated on Elizabeth in 2006 when her cancer was in remission. His infidelity was oncologically correct"

Thoughts?

Jyber · 08-11-2008, 05:55 AM

I feel that his making that point was one of several inappropriate/less than ideal comments of his. IF he wanted to communicate that his infidelity did not take place while his wife was actively battling cancer, he could have handled it somewhat less brazenly, by referring to the sequence of things that had been going on in their lives before and after the affair.

Also, they both must have known she had a significant risk of recurrence. I am always aware of that and believe my husband is as well. But perhaps they were in denial.

Interestingly, Elizabeth in her statement commented that her stage 4 diagnosis oddly helped them get past the affair. Perhaps when John realized he might lose her he focused more on her importance to him.

I am, frankly, a former supporter who is now diappointed in both of them -- mostly him, of course, but her as well for enabling him in the charade. Their marriage is their private business but they both tried to mislead their supporters and the country and were willing to take a huge risk that the affair would not come to light. Honesty is always the best policy IMO.

RhondaH · 08-11-2008, 06:01 AM

the "fact" that she was (was not) in remission makes what he did less severe?...NOTTTT. I wasn't a supporter (though I am "party" affiliated), but it seems that "infidelity" is bipartisan.

karen z · 08-11-2008, 06:41 AM

Jyber and Rhonda,
Thank you for your posts. I have found myself very upset at all of this (the actions, the lies, and the most recent statements during the long interview Edwards gave). There are so many people hurt here- obviously the family (which includes children and a woman who has already endured more than her share of pain, but friends, relatives, and so many supporters or (as you say Rhonda, "party" affiliated- that would include me too). What a tragic mess. I think that the Dowd article is a good one to read about now.
karen z

hutchibk · 08-11-2008, 08:29 AM

He is the most shallow and vacuous type of slimeball...

notamrnpsn · 08-11-2008, 08:55 AM

If it was my husband, he would be hanging by them by now, Jeanette

karen z · 08-11-2008, 09:04 AM

Hutchibk and Jeanette,
All good points........very slimy stuff (like anyone needs this right now or ever).
karen z

Jean · 08-11-2008, 10:11 AM

I find it strange that men who enter into such a high end public vocation....do what they do? Do they really believe that what they do in private will not be disclosed. They made a choice to work in a public arena.

While I believe that their private lives belongs to them
and it is a shame that (she) has to respond at all
about her marriage....(and her cancer) for that matter,
since it is her business, for the sake of public face she
is attempting to make the best of the situation, more than likely for the kids sake.

But without a doubt, Edwards is a fool who thinks with his little head.

Jean

Andrea Barnett Budin · 08-11-2008, 11:18 AM

At dinner with 3 other couples last night, this discussion came up. All the above were mentioned. Especially that if he were indeed the Dem Pres candidate, this revelation would surely screw the Dems, and the nation!

My point here is a bit different. REPORTERS KEEP MENTIONING THAT ELIZABETH (who we know has metastatic bc at this point) HAS *INOPERABLE*, *INCURABLE* CANCER. Those at my table were commenting that she is not long for this world, that she is terminally ill.

Each reporter states repeatedly that Elizabeth has an incurable form of cancer and each time it riles me.

I was told in '98 (when my bc spread throughout my liver) that what I had was inoperable, incurable and that I would be on long term chemotherapy for the rest of my life. At first I thought I was a walking corpse. Sure to die. I read the statistics. They were poor. I did rally however and decided that someone had to be in that tiny group of Survivors and I intended fully, with every ounce of determination to concentrate and call up strength and courage I had never really thought I had in such abundance.

So, I am thinking that our society is perpetuating our fear of THE BIG C, which they often whisper and will not name aloud, as they cower over the very thought of standing up to cancer.

At the dinner table last night I had to insert that perhaps Elizabeth is no more terminally ill than I am, or was. Inoperable and incurable are scary words to be sure. But my oncs told me that even if they did operate on all my many tumors, my body would be weakened and I would still have to undergo chemotherapy. Better to be strong in facing that. And as for incurable -- cancer is not curable. But it is capable of being managed, with any number of weapons the medical/scientific world has in their arsenal. The cure is coming. For now, cancer is a chronic condition that has flare ups, can be tracked vigilantly, tamped down and controlled.

My favorite mantra is I AM STRONG, BRAVE AND DETERMINED. And, I plan on living forever or die trying. Every day I break my own record for # of days staying alive. I do not forfeit a single day to bemoaning my sorry lot. I embrace the gift of each day and stay PRESENT as best I can. Connected to my Spirit, which is who I truly am. A Soul -- with a mind (a voice of its own that needs constant disciplining) and a body. *I* am the AWARENESS behind and beyond the taunting and tormenting thoughts that race around in my head.

BTW, I read that on September 5 the three major networks are airing a show about STANDING UP^ 2 CA... I have it marked on my calendar.

With Love and Light,
Andi

Vi Schorpp · 08-11-2008, 12:11 PM

I find it strange that people in the public arena are willing to live in the public arena. Look at Barbara Walters and Strom Thurmond....if the media had been at the pace it is now neither of these two people would have been able to function in the public arena. Most probably they would have lost their jobs and status, or had been so ashamed they would have hidden.

Great people, great faults!

hutchibk · 08-11-2008, 12:20 PM

1. “Family values” and “basic human morality” were a staple in Edwards’ stump speeches while he was campaigning for president.

2. Edwards offered this quote while running for president in the dem primaries in 2007: “…I think every single candidate for president, Republican and Democratic have lives, personal lives, that indicate something about what kind of human being they are. And I think it is a fair evaluation for America to engage in to look at what kind of human beings each of us are, and what kind of president we’d make.”

3. He was also quoted as saying (about Bill Clinton, during the Lewinsky scandal): "I think this President has shown a remarkable disrespect for his office, for the moral dimensions of leadership, for his friends, for his wife, for his precious daughter. It is breathtaking to me the level to which that disrespect has risen."

Besides the deep betrayal of his wife, especially during her illness, he has turned out to be a hypocrite of the highest order, and it will bite him in the bum, deservedly so.

I can't for the life of me figure out why Elizabeth has come forward and apologized for his actions on the Daily Kos. That is just downright insane. I simply don't understand why women defend the men who betray them in such public and humiliating ways.

I guess I would turn around that phrase that Vi offered: 'great faults mean they are apparently not such great people...'

sarah · 08-11-2008, 12:21 PM

Well the power of politics seems to bring out the worst in some men. Remember Newt Ginggrich? Newt pressed his first wife to sign divorce papers while she was still in the hospital recovering from cancer surgery. He also graciously said "She isn't young enough or pretty enough to be the President's wife."
I'm sure there's a many of us who have met women whose husbands left them when they got cancer - they couldn't cope and certainly didn't want to have to take care of someone else.
My husband constantly says "How can these men live with themselves?" Quite well it seems.

BonnieR · 08-11-2008, 12:57 PM

Hutchibk, I think the hypocrisy you quoted is what gets me the most.

Margerie · 08-11-2008, 01:07 PM

Think what his legacy could have been...and what it will now be.

What a waste of space he is.

Julie2 · 08-11-2008, 01:35 PM

Thanks Andrea, I am so sick and depressed of the word incurable, it is like people telling you don't have chance to live.

Julie

Ruth · 08-11-2008, 01:48 PM

I liked John Edwards, I really did. But for whatever reason (if there can be one) he strayed. It is particulary unbelievable to us because she has cancer. But it has happened so many times in the past and will happen in the future. Whether it is a president or the convenience store clerk down the street. I would hate to have my spouse in the public eye and so much attention drawn to myself and my children when something like this happens. I can't help but think of their children. Those poor babies. I know we can't understand how she can defend him but I am pretty sure it is to protect her children as much as she can. If she goes out and bashes him on TV we all feel good about it but her kids feel more horrible than they probably already do. You try to protect your kids as much as you can but with the internet, cell phones, TV and friends it is a HUGE task. There is nothing more damaging to kids than parents fighting...even if one is wrong and the other right. They don't see it like that. It just hurts them.
This whole news just is so disappointing. I really hate politics!
Ruth

Jean · 08-11-2008, 03:59 PM

Ruth,
I agree that she is protecting her children.
Very wise loving mothers during a nasty divorce will
keep the kids out of the pipe line...in this case it is
almost impossible ....so I think she is doing her part
to be strong for them.

Val,
Yes your correct about Barbara (whom I really
enjoy and admire) but - she was not attempting to
run for the most powerful job....(and she is still wrong)
to get herself involved with a married man.

I wish all women who have the unfortunate situation who get involved with a married (who tells them) that
he is staying just for the kids, or whatever excuse is used....I believe anyone can fall out of love for many reasons...but do the decent thing...tell the person you are married to and end that realtionship first before
getting involved with another.

Let's face it, men who have Power, Money, Title,
Good Looks, do get away with more....and in the last few years it has been very active in the political arena.

Too bad they do NOT have "Strong Character " to go along with all those other qualities.

Jean

karen z · 08-11-2008, 04:12 PM

Yes, Hutchibk, the hypocrisy is appalling (and thank you for sharing the unbelievable quotes). And I have to say that the "Ken doll" image that the girlfriend was attempting to "help" Edwards shed was more than apparent during the interview (what an empty-headed goofy guy emerged). And Andi, some of the newspaper editors and reporters who keep using the same language over and over again (and take phrases from one another without a thought to what they are saying) could benefit from a letter similar to your post here.

Bill · 08-11-2008, 04:24 PM

Edwards is pathetic. I saw some of the interview last night, and what I heard, to paraphrase, "you just feel like you can do anything and get away with it". Like I said, it's not a direct quote. He was trying to justify what he did. I hope we never see him in office again. And SarahDalton, thanks for bringing up that episode regarding Newt Gingrich from 14 years ago. I had forgotten about that one. I just feel so bad for his family.

Patb · 08-11-2008, 04:35 PM

Amen to all the above. This is a topic that won't go
away for some time. Why was she getting paid by a
campaign staffer and another staffer says he is the
father of the baby. What a mess and the whole truth
is yet to be probably. When he was interviewed by
I believe (Bob Woodriff) he looked like a deer in the
headlights. He asked him why Elizabeth wasn't there
and he said I needed to be a man and take this and I
asked her not to be here. Please!!!!
patb