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Old 05-09-2011, 10:19 AM   #1
trasia
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2011
Posts: 37
Re: I'm Taking Care of My Mom

merry,
you say or write the things that I would not be able to describe in a vivid and honest way. I love my mother and my daughter too, its like I am in between this 2 great loves and I always felt am not doing enough and wanted to do more for the other, but cant, its always half or even quarter of myself.. thanks for your courage in airing out what I could have not done myself.

I reckon this could be therapeutic and should try it myself.. hope you find something fun to do with your mom.. something you will cherish for a long long time..
__________________
I learned to hold myself with dignity, respect and humility. My mother taught me to love and care for humanity, and a compassion that I have never seen matched. She is brilliant, and more generous than any person I have ever met. I know my mother loves me more than life itself. Her latest lesson is Courage as WE seek treatment for her condition and she enter the great unknown, and faces her inner demons…And I promised her that I will be her strength when she needs it, and her patience when she cannot bear it anymore..

~trasia (primary caregiver of her 60 year old mother- IDC Stage 2B ER+ 90% PR- Her2+++ 3/25 lymph node involvement (Diagnosed Jan 2010- BMX- Feb 2010)
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Old 05-16-2011, 08:54 AM   #2
Merry
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Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 32
Re: I'm Taking Care of My Mom

Tras...I get that from my Mom....lolol Takes me awhile to get back here with all the stuff I get caught up in here. Mom had to have her lung tapped, and it didn't re-expand like it did the first few times and she had to have 3 xrays which she bitched about because of the excess radiation, lolol she says THAT is gonna kill her first! It still hasn't expanded, and I'm pretty sure it's cuz of the tumors in that lung and the fact that it's working harder than it normally would. It's just a closer step towards the inevitable end of the road. I was talking to a Scooter Store about Medicare getting her a scooter but the guy tells me that Medicare is more about going as cheap as possible and since she can mostly get around the house with her own power or a cane, they would feel she's ambulatory enough. SO..the Visiting Nurse Assc. is gonna pay the rent for a scooter for a month! It's $250 a month and somehow I'll find a way to get another month if she likes it and can use it. I just want to be able to get it into the trunk and take her to the river where I walk the dog so she can be outside and enjoy Spring. She's being stubborn about it because she has to learn how to drive it and acts like she's too stupid to figure it out, lol.
And so it goes. My brother has decided he doesn't want to go to work and he's using the Family Med Leave Act to get time off. Sadly, he spends the time sitting in the shed listening to the radio and drinking instead of helping his sister around the house or spending time with his Mom. He is lying to his job about Mom needing him home, but he DID take her to the hospital twice last week for the xrays and tapping so I could take the dog to the Vet. Will wonders never cease!?! LoLoL She told him to go to work but again, I went out early this morning to walk the dog around and he was passed out in his car. What a great family I have, eh? LoL If he was truly a decent and caring son and brother, he'd offer to do what I do for Mom and let me fly home to be with my husband and in my own home for a little while. But I know what would happen if I left for a little while...Mom would be trying to cook, clean and take care of him and the dog and herself while panting for air. She insisted on making dinner Sunday and I let her except I peeled the potatoes and got all the pots and pans and ingredients out for her and I cleaned up the kitchen because by that time, she was too exhausted. She kept apologizing for the mess and I just smile and make a joke about it and clean it up. I want her to do whatever she thinks she can do while she can. I can't make her breakfast cuz she likes her oatmeal a certain way and I can't do it her way so she's ok doing it herself. I can't take away all of her 'usefulness' or indepedence and I don't want to.
I truly appreciate being able to 'vent' here and have you wonderful people put up with my complaining. It truly helps me and I wish I could get back here more often. The poor dog came down with Lyme disease and I have to give him meds, give Mom meds, and I just hope that I don't accidently confuse who gets what! I told Mom last night that if she she tries to lift her leg to pee, I may have accidently given her some of Shooter's meds! LoLoL She said she'd let me know...hee hee hee.
God bless you and everyone here. I'm not sure how I found this site anymore, but I think an Angel in Pink showed me the way. Peace, G
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