Freaking out - any advice?

[caya]

I had my first post-op/chemo mammogram last week on my left breast and today I got a call from my breast surgeon's secretary saying the radiologist would like to see my old films (from my former mammogram office). He would like something to compare this mammo with, although he thinks what he is seeing is benign. The last set of mammograms I had were in June 2006 showing no sign of malignancy (yeah right!), before I had my breast reduction, when my plastic surgeon found my tumour on Oct. 16, 2006.
I also had a breast ultrasound at that time, also clean.
Before my MRM I had a breast MRI which picked up another 1 cm. tumour in my right breast, which was coming off anyways. The left breast was clean - this was Dec. 2006. I told both my onc. and breast surgeon that the mammo and ultrasound were useless to me, but they both insisted to go with the mammo - so now here I am, hysterical that I have BC in my other breast - and I won't know anything until Thursday because that radiologist is not in until then.
I called the onc. on call as my regular onc. is away for 2 weeks (naturally) to ask her opinion on whether it would be possible for me to have a new tumour so soon after just finishing chemo and being on Herceptin and the Tamox. She was very reassuring, said it would be "highly unlikely, but with cancer we can never say never." She said she would look over my case notes and confer with the radiologist on Thursday and one of them would call me. She also said it was a good sign that the radiologist thinks it is benign, he wouldn't have reported that if he thought otherwise. He wants to see my previous films to be cautious.
So my question is - how much sleep should I be losing over the next 2 days?

I had my last chemo on May 10th, been on Herceptin since June 10th ( 4 every 3 week infusions), Tamoxifen since July 10th. I was stage 1, grade 2, no nodes at dx in Oct. 2006.

Thanks for any suggestions and words of wisdom.

caya

[Becky]

I am assuming this is your first post surgical mammo. Making that assumption, there are always things - calcifications and scar tissue from the healing process. And the surgeons always want the previous mammos - even after surgery when everything is different. Your surgeon just wants to see if anything was there before and is it bigger. You would know that as somebody would have told you that you had something benign in there. You say there was nothing there and now the surgeon sees something that he thinks is benign - well, it probably is and is just scar tissue and perhaps lucent calcifications (lucent are always benign and associated with breast injury (which surgery certainly is)).

Don't worry - after breast surgery - there are always lots and lots of new things to see.

[Mary Jo]

Hi Caya,

If I am understanding you correctly, you had a right breast cancer and a right breast mastectomy. Correct? This "suspicious" area is in your left breast? If this is the scenario I see from your post, I was in a typical situation just after my chemo and radiation were finished.

I, too, had a right breast cancer and a right breast mastectomy. When I went in for my mammogram the day after radiation ended of my left breast I had a message on my answering machine from my surgeon when we walked in the door from that appointment (we travel a little more than a hour for my care). My surgeon said that there was a suspicious area of calcification that they wanted to biopsy. OH MY GOSH! I couldn't believe it either. My surgeon and my onc. were very optimistic that is was benign and even if it wasn't it was VERY small so that would be good news. They were saying whatever it was was insitu if nothing else. AND THAT WAS SUPPOSE TO MAKE ME FEEL BETTER! Well, like you, it didn't. I simply couldn't believe it. I mean geez, I was sure the first breast cancer was nothing too AND that wasn't.

So, I went through a stereotactic biopsy of the left breast and I can HAPPILY REPORT it TRULY WAS NOTHING. Just a benign area of calcification. OH MY GOSH - can you FEEL how happy that made me.

Anyway, long story short - 3 weeks later I had a left breast prophylactic mastectomy as I was determined to NEVER go through that mammogram stuff again. Ever! My surgeon did not argue with me as she knew from the get go that is really what I wanted. The greatest news of all was that after the prophylactic mastectomy was done and pathology went through the entire breast.............NO CANCER WAS FOUND. So..............

I won't even begin to tell you to rest easy as I don't think that is humanly possible considering where we've been BUT I can tell you the chances of it being cancer, after all you've been through, probably isn't. They are just being SUPER CAUTIOUS as well they should be BUT MAN, the stress it causes.

So, hang on sweetie..................soon this roller coaster ride will be over. Well, at least this part of it.

Mary Jo

[caya]

Thank you Becky and Mary Jo for your sensible calming answers.
Becky, this was my first post. surgical mammo (after the breast reduction). It makes perfect sense that there could be scar tissue, etc. in there. I guess in my rush to think - not cancer again - I did not think of this.
And thank you too Mary Jo for your story - I am more inclined than ever to do a left prophylactic mastectomy now. I had discussed this with both my onc. and BS and they both dissuaded me from doing it. If this turns out to be B9 - I will make another appointment with the Plastic Surgeon I saw last fall about doing a mast. and reconstruction together, just to discuss that possibility.
Just when I think I'm turning a corner, something else happens.

Thanks again for your replies, I really think I will be able to sleep okay now.
caya

[Erin]

Caya,

I know EXACTLY how you feel. Reading your post was like looking in a mirror. At my first post surgery/chemo mammo they found microcalcifications in the other breast - BIRADS 4 (which I thought was not the worst, until the surgeon said "well, if it were higher we would already know it was cancer").

It took 2 weeks to get the sterotactic biopsy and several days to get the results. Needless to say, that was a horrible two weeks. I had myself convinced that I had a second cancer, that I would never be free from this nightmare, and on and on and on. I think the wait for those results was worse than for the first dx, because I knew what I had to fear.

Thank god the results were negative, though by the time I got them I had completely prepared myself for it to be cancer, so I was quite shocked and it took a few minutes for it to sink in!

I am so sorry that you are going through this :-( I will not tell you not to worry, but try to keep your hopes up, and try not to dwell on it. I will be rooting for you!

[DonnaD]

Hi Caya,
I too know exactly how you feel. I just had post mammograms done July 13 (Friday the 13 no less). They called me back in for more films and said they saw something suspicious in the right breast, had lumpectomy on left breast. After reviewing previous films they said it was just overlapping tissue. My surgeon and onc also read the films and said all was fine.

The following week I had an appointment with my rad onc. She said they are always overly cautious on the first posts mams. So take a deep breath and try to relax.

Please let us know what you find out.
Donna

[Belinda]

Caya - I just caught up with your posts - and so sorry that you are going through all of this. I can't offer a lot of advice, but it does seem like you have very vgilant specialists and that could be very reassuring. Also - you talked about a proph mast. I has my right breast removed prophylactically (I didn't trust mammograms, scans and us's because they didn't find the cancer in my right breast), and I don't regret it one bit. I would rather have the peace of mind that I get from not having to constantly feeling worry about my right breast, than have the breast itself.

Good luck with your ultrasound Monday - Belindaxxx