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08-16-2007, 05:10 PM
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#1
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Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Southern, CA
Posts: 2,511
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Having a difficult time...
As some of you *might* know...my Mother was DX not to long after my bc DX with advanced lung cancer. Stage IV. She was a trooper and had several different drugs used to fight her cancer. I was so proud of her on how hard she fought this. She was 77 years old and she amazed me. But we just had to place her in hospice two days ago...she wasn't doing well. I went down there late last night and spent time with her. I'm so thankful I did because I just got a call today that my Mother has passed away.
The un-believable grief I feel right now is unbearable. My Mother was everything to me...we were so close. Not just my Mother but my best friend. I can't imagine life without her. Did I mentioned how much I hate this darned disease! How I pray for a cure. I'm having a hard time typing through the tears. Just sharing with people I feel safe with.
Feeling lost & so alone.
Chelee
__________________
DX: 12-20-05 - Stage IIIA, Her2/Neu, 3+++,Er & Pr weakly positive, 5 of 16 pos nodes.
Rt. MRM on 1-3-06 -- No Rads due to compromised lungs.
Chemo started 2-7-06 -- TCH - - Finished 6-12-06
Finished yr of wkly herceptin 3-19-07
3-15-07 Lt side prophylactic simple mastectomy. -- Ooph 4-05-07
9-21-09 PET/CT "Recurrence" to Rt. axllia, Rt. femur, ilium. Possible Sacrum & liver? Now stage IV.
9-28-09 Loading dose of Herceptin & started Zometa
9-29-09 Power Port Placement
10-24-09 Mass 6.4 x 4.7 cm on Rt. femur head.
11-19-09 RT. Femur surgery - Rod placed
12-7-09 Navelbine added to Herceptin/Zometa.
3-23-10 Ten days of rads to RT femur. Completed.
4-05-10 Quit Navelbine--Herceptin/Zometa alone.
5-4-10 Appt. with Dr. Slamon to see what is next? Waiting on FISH results from femur biopsy.
Results to FISH was unsuccessful--this happens less then 2% of the time.
7-7-10 Recurrence to RT axilla again. Back to UCLA for options.
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08-16-2007, 05:16 PM
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#2
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Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 556
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Sorry for the new Cheele. I know how difficult it would be to loose the mother.
Julie
__________________
Diagnosed in Sept 2004 while pregnant with the second child. Stage 3b, tumor 4.5cm, 4 auxillary and supraclav node positive. Her2+++ FISH 9.4 and er-,pr-.
Had dose dense neoadjuvant AC,Taxol then mastectomy,radiation+xeloda+Herceptin.
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08-16-2007, 05:24 PM
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#3
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Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Central Coast, CA
Posts: 3,207
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Dear Chelee,
I am so sorry to hear of your mom's passing. It is so difficult to lose a parent. I lost my mom over 10 years ago and it still hurts. It's such a blessing, tho, that you were able to spend time with her. I guess I know now where you get your fighting spirit! She must have been very proud of you.
I know this is a very sad time for you and I hope you can feel my prayers and love wrapping around you right now. And especially, know that you have your special angel watching over you now.
Much, much love
chris
__________________
Chris in Scotts Valley
June 2002 extensive hi grade DCIS (pre-cancer-stage 0, clean sentinal node) Mastectomy/implant - no chemo, rads. "cured?"
9/2004 Diag: Stage IV extensive liver mets (!) ER/PR- Her2+++
10/04-3/05 Weekly Taxol/Carboplatin/Herceptin , complete response!
04/05 - 4/07 Herception every 3 wks, Continue NED
04/07 - recurrence to liver - 2 spots, starting tykerb/avastin trial
06/07 8/07 10/07 Scans show stable, continue on Tykerb/Avastin
01/08 Progression in liver
02/08 Begin (TDM1) trial
08/08 NED! It's Working! Continue on TDM1
02/09 Continue NED
02/10 Continue NED. 5/10 9/10 Scans NED 10/10 Scans NED
12/10 Scans not clear....4/11 Scans suggest progression 6/11 progression confirmed in liver
07/11 - 11/11 Herceptin/Xeloda -not working:(
12/11 Begin MM302 Phase I trial - bust:(
03/12 3rd times the charm? AKT trial
5/12 Scan shows reduction! 7/12 More reduction!!!!
8/12 Whoops...progression...trying for Perjeta/Herceptin (plus some more nasty chemo!)
9/12 Start Perjeta/Herceptin, chemo on hold due to infection/wound in leg, added on cycle 2 &3
11/12 Poops! progression in liver, Stop Perjeta/Taxo/Herc
11/12 Navelbine/Herce[ptin - try for a 3 cycles, no go.
2/13 Gemzar/Carbo/Herceptin - no go.
3/13 TACE procedure
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08-16-2007, 05:46 PM
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#4
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Senior Member
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 3,519
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May the lord hold you and comfort you, Chelee. Just know that he now cares for your mother and she has no more disease or pain. My deepest sympathies for your loss.
__________________
Brenda
NOV 2012 - 9 yr anniversary
JULY 2012 - 7 yr anniversary stage IV (of 50...)
Nov'03~ dX stage 2B
Dec'03~ Rt side mastectomy, Her2+, ER/PR+, 10 nodes out, one node positive
Jan'04~ Taxotere/Adria/Cytoxan x 6, NED, no Rads, Tamox. 1 year, Arimadex 3 mo., NED 14 mo.
Sept'05~ micro mets lungs/chest nodes/underarm node, Switched to Aromasin, T/C/H x 7, NED 6 months - Herceptin only
Aug'06~ micro mets chest nodes, & bone spot @ C3 neck, Added Taxol to Herceptin
Feb'07~ Genetic testing, BRCA 1&2 neg
Apr'07~ MRI - two 9mm brain mets & 5 punctates, new left chest met, & small increase of bone spot C3 neck, Stopped Aromasin
May'07~ Started Tykerb/Xeloda, no WBR for now
June'07~ MRI - stable brain mets, no new mets, 9mm spots less enhanced, CA15.3 down 45.5 to 9.3 in 10 wks, Ty/Xel working magic!
Aug'07~ MRI - brain mets shrunk half, NO NEW BRAIN METS!!, TMs stable @ 9.2
Oct'07~ PET/CT & MRI show NED
Apr'08~ scans still show NED in the head, small bone spot on right iliac crest (rear pelvic bone)
Sept'08~ MRI shows activity in brain mets, completed 5 fractions/5 consecutive days of IMRT to zap the pesky buggers
Oct'08~ dropped Xeloda, switched to tri-weekly Herceptin in combo with Tykerb, extend to tri-monthly Zometa infusion
Dec'08~ Brain MRI- 4 spots reduced to punctate size, large spot shrunk by 3mm, CT of torso clear/pelvis spot stable
June'09~ new 3-4mm left cerrebellar spot zapped with IMRT targeted rads
Sept'09~ new 6mm & 1 cm spots in pituitary/optic chiasm area. Rx= 25 days of 3D conformal fractionated targeted IMRT to the tumors.
Oct'09~ 25 days of low dose 3D conformal fractionated targeted IMRT to the bone mets spot on rt. iliac crest that have been watching for 2 years. Added daily Aromasin back into treatment regimen.
Apr'10~ Brain MRI clear! But, see new small spot on adrenal gland. Change from Aromasin back to Tamoxifen.
June'10~ Tumor markers (CA15.3) dropped from 37 to 23 after one month on Tamoxifen. Continue to monitor adrenal gland spot. Remain on Tykerb/Herceptin/Tamoxifen.
Nov'10~ Radiate positive mediastinal node that was pressing on recurrent laryngeal nerve, causing paralyzed larynx and a funny voice.
Jan'11~ MRI shows possible activity or perhaps just scar tissue/necrotic increase on 3 previously treated brain spots and a pituitary spot. 5 days of IMRT on 4 spots.
Feb'11~ Enrolled in T-DM1 EAP in Denver, first treatment March 25, 2011.
Mar'11~ Finally started T-DM1 EAP in Denver at Rocky Mountain Cancer Center/Rose on Mar. 25... hallelujah.
"I would rather be anecdotally alive than statistically dead."
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08-16-2007, 05:47 PM
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#5
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Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Grand Rapids, MI
Posts: 1,516
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Chelee...
my thoughts and prayers are with you. BIGGGG huggs to you.
Rhonda
__________________
Rhonda
Dx 2/1/05, Stage 1, 0 nodes, Grade 3, ER/PR-, HER2+ (3.16 Fish)
2/7/05, Partial Mastectomy
5/18/05 Finished 6 rounds of dose dense TEC (Taxotere, Epirubicin and Cytoxan)
8/1/05 Finished 33 rads
8/18/05 Started Herceptin, every 3 weeks for a year (last one 8/10/06)
2/1/13...8 year Cancerversary and I am "perfect" (at least where cancer is concerned;)
" And in the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years."- Abraham Lincoln
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08-16-2007, 05:55 PM
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#6
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Founder - HER2 Support Group
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Carlsbad, CA
Posts: 361
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My Mom passed away from metastatic bc in October 1989, eight months later I was diagnosed with breast cancer.
Mom and I were more like sisters. My dad had died from a heart attack when I was 14 and we both used each other for support through the hard times. She saw me through college and graduate school.
In all likelyhood my Mom was also HER2 positive, but back in 1989 there was nothing available.
Hugs
Christine
__________________
1990, July DX 1.1cm er-, pr-
Lumpectomy, 5U4, radiation
1999, June mets to chest and brain
HER2 3+++, er- pr-
AC, Taxol, Herceptin, Gamma Knife (3 treatments) WBR
NED July 2001
December 2001 - Founded HER2 Support Group
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08-16-2007, 06:02 PM
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#7
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Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Lumberton, Mississippi
Posts: 118
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I am so sorry to hear the news about your Mom. My heart goes out to you. I will be praying that God gives you peace and strength.
Love and Hugs,
Linda
S. Mississippi
__________________
Diagnosed 12/23/04
Biopsy 12/28/04
Lumpectomy 1/04/05
IDC, ER-PR-, HER2Neu+++
7mm tumor, Stage 1, Grade 3
6 CAF's
38 Rads
Finished 10/05
"Worry looks around. Sorry looks back. Faith looks up."
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08-16-2007, 07:31 PM
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#8
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Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 492
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Chelee,
So sorry to hear about losing your mom. She was blessed in life, having such a special relationship with her daughter. She will be with you in your heart.
__________________
Are we there yet?
Dx 10/05 IDC, multi-focal, triple +, 5 nodes+
MRM, 4 DD A/C, 12 weekly taxol + herceptin
rads concurrent with taxol/herceptin
finished herceptin 01/08
ooph, Arimidex, bilateral DIEP reconstruction
NED
Univ. of WA, Seattle vaccine trial '07
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08-16-2007, 07:36 PM
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#9
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Guest
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Chelee,
So very sorry about your mother. Your biggest comfort will be knowing you did everything you could for her. My thoughts are with you.
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08-16-2007, 07:48 PM
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#10
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Northern California
Posts: 764
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So sorry for your loss. She is safe now.
God Bless
__________________
DX 02/01/07
2.5 cm, Er/Pr-, Her2+++
18/20 Nodes
03/07 CT & Bone scan - Clear
AC x 4, Taxol x 4, Added Herceptin
Radiation until 09/07
Herceptin every 3 weeks until 06/08
01/10/08 local recurrence -IBC
01/28/08 CT & Brain MRI - clear
02/08 - Navelbine & Herceptin
05/08 -MRM
05/08 - Gemzar & Herceptin - didn't work
09/08 - Hyperthermia rads
03/09 - Tykerb/Xeloda
05/10 - Tram flap to fix wound
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08-16-2007, 07:57 PM
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#11
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Senior Member
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 823
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Chelee my thoughts and prayers go out to you on the loss of your Mom.
I know how difficult this is. I lost my Mom 14 yrs ago,to cancer as well. She was only 58 years old.
Just know that she is no longer in pain and she will always be looking after you.
Sending you lot's of cyber (((((((((HUG'S)))))))))
__________________
Vicki
Texas
Biopsy Dx'd 3-23-05 Age 48
MRM 4-5-05 w/ 2 tumor's 5cm, and 6 cm (right side)
IDC (poorly differentiated infiltrating ductual carcinoma)
5+/16 nodes
Stage III A
Grade 3
ER/PR-, Her2/neu ++
Ki67 78%
Begin Chemo 5-2-05 4XAC Dose Dense , 4X Abraxane Dose Dense (ended August 05)
28 Rad's ended October 13 2005
Started Herceptin Weekly August 2005 for one year
Had a Simple mastectomy left side after Mamo showed incresed micro-calcifications. Jan. 17 2006.
Brain MRI Feb.2006--All Clear
August 28, 2006 Last Weekly Herceptin.
October 2006--Colonoscopy, 6 Polyp's removed--all B9
PET Scan July 2007
Abdominal MRI Oct. 2007---2 Right Kidney Cysts
Core Biopsy-- Lump on Scar Line 1-10-08---B9
Brain MRI 6-2008--All Clear
PET/CT Scan 6-2008
Sept. 8 2008, 4CM area removed from mastectomy scar line. Proved to be B9.
PET/CT Scan-- July 2009 --All clear
August 17,2009 ---Had Port Removed
6 Years NED -- April 5,2011
DX'd with Melanoma left arm 10-10-2011
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08-16-2007, 08:01 PM
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#12
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 144
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Please know that she will always be with you in all that you do. She can rest now, as so should you.
Take care of yourself and grieve until you are done.
Peace be with you,
Emelie
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08-16-2007, 08:36 PM
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#13
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Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Houston, Texas
Posts: 624
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I am so sorry about the loss of your mother. She was fortunate to have a daughter like you, as you were fortunate to have a mother like her. Although you will always grieve for her, time will lessen the pain. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
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08-17-2007, 12:20 PM
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#14
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Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Streetsboro, Ohio
Posts: 365
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I'm so sorry about the loss of your mother. My own mother lost her 13 year battle with cancer 25 years ago. It's never easy. Love, Lu Ann.
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08-17-2007, 01:02 PM
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#15
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Senior Member
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Boise, Idaho
Posts: 758
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Dear Chelee,
I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I want you to cherish your memories of her and know that she will always be with you in spirit. My mother died nearly 60 years ago when I was 9. Sometime I feel sorry for myself because I can't remember her very well and that I did not get to know her as a person and not just as "mother". I would give anything for that experience which you were so lucky to have.
Love and hugs,
Marlys
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08-17-2007, 04:24 PM
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#16
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Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Greendale, WI
just outside Milwaukee
Posts: 211
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Chelee, I too understand the loss of a mother. It has to be one of the most painfull things we have to endure. I know for about the first 2 years I always thought about how my mother would of enjoyed this or that outing or holiday, but trust me it does get easier with time. Still to this day, eight years after her death, I always try to wear her ring, or a piece of her clothing at family events. It may sound silly, but wearing something of hers helps me feel she is there joining the celebration. My hope is that she had excellent palative care. If anyone else needs help getting end of life help for their loved ones. Please contact: www.compassionandchoices.org, or call 800-247-7421 for free confidential client support. Just ask to speak to a Client Support Counselor. I am a strong supporter of hospice and end of life choices. My heart goes out to you, because it does not matter how old your are when you lose a parent, the pain is still hard to bare. Peace be with you and your family. Karen
__________________
04/05 Onset 49, DCIS, solid, Hist 2/3, Nucl 2/3, 7cm R Brst
04/05 E & P + HER2+++
05/05 Mediport
05/05 Cytoxan & Adriamycin every 3wk x4
08/05 Taxol every 2wk x 4, Herceptin every wk x1yr
10/05 Bilat Mast - my Choice
10/05 3/19 lymph nodes Pos, Stage IIIa
11/05 Rad x 37 Rx, R Brst & Axcilla
02/06 Herceptin stopped (L vent HF 40)
03/06 Started & Stoped Arimidex after 2 mos.-QOL side effects
05/06 Started Tamoxafin
06/06 Bilat Free Flap Reconstruction
12/06 Cardiomyopathy reversed-HF normal
01/07 Bilat Saline Implants
07/07 CA 27-29 steadily rising from 28 in 12/06 to 46 in 7/07
07/07 PET Scan NED, but inflamation at prev surg site.
09/07 Started Femara
10/07 CA 27-29 down to 39
06/08 CA 27-29 down to 32
09/08 Lg joint pain & QOL side effects from Femara, will live w/ to keep CA markers within normal range.
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08-17-2007, 04:29 PM
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#17
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Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Oregon
Posts: 1,756
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Dear Chelee,
I really feel for you. I lost my mother last year, and yes, it hurts deeply. When I feel sad about my mom, I try to remember all the good times we had, and how much she loved us kids, and that helps. Try planting something in her memory, that also helps.
Many hugs, Lolly
__________________
Sept.'99 - Dx.Stage IIIB, IDC ER/PR-, HER2+++ by IHC, confirmed '04 by FISH. Left MRM, AC x's 4, Taxol x's 4, 33 Rads, finishing Tx May 2000. Jan.'01 - local/regional recurrence, Stage IV. Herceptin/Navelbine weekly till NED August 2001, then maintenance Herceptin. Right Mast. April 2002. Local/Regional recurrence April '04, Herceptin plus/minus chemo until May '07. Gemzar added from Feb.'07-April '07; Tykerb/Abraxane until August '07, back on Herceptin plus Taxotere and Xeloda Sept. '07. Stopped T/X Nov. '07, stopped Herceptin Dec. '07, started Avastin/Taxol/Carboplatin Dec. '07. Progression in chest skin, stopped TAC March '03, started radiation.
Herceptin has served as the "Backbone" of my treatment strategy for over 6 years, giving me great quality of life. In 2005, I was privileged to participate in the University of Washington/Seattle HER2 Vaccine Trial.
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08-17-2007, 04:28 PM
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#18
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Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Ireland
Posts: 3,463
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Chelee I'm really sorry and saddened to hear your about your Mother and will be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.
__________________
Tricia
Dx July '05 IDC 1.9cm Triple positive 3/9 nodes positive
A/C X 4 ..Taxol/Herceptin x 12 wks then herceptin 1 yr
Rads x 36 ..oophorectomy August '06
Currently taking Arimidex..
June 2011 osteopenia/ zometa x1 yearly- stopped Zometa 2015 as Dexa show normal bone density.
Stopped Arimidex July 2014- Restarted Arimidex 2015 for a further two years on the advice of my Onc.
2014 Normal Dexa scan
2018 Mammo all clear, still NED!
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08-17-2007, 06:08 PM
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#19
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Senior Member
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 476
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Chelee, my deepest condolence and sympathy. Lung cancer is a very dreadful disease. As the Sloan Ketterling lung cancer head once told me, the medical science has not found a way to combat this disease yet. Your mother is free from misery now and she will always be a very special person to you. Please take care of yourself. My prayer for you and your family.
__________________
Ann
Stage 1 dx Sept 05
ER/PR positive HER2 +++ Grade 3
Invasive carcinoma 1 cm, no node involvement
Mastec Sept 05
Annual scans all negative, Oct 06
Postmenopause. Arimidex only since Sept 06, bone or muscle ache after 3 month
Off Arimidex, change to Femara 1/12-07, ache stopped
Sept 07 all tests negative, pass 2 year mark
Feb 08 continue doing well.
Sep 09 four year NED still on Femara.
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08-17-2007, 08:22 PM
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#20
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Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Lincoln, Rhode Island
Posts: 371
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Dear Chelee,
I am so very sorry sending you my love and prayers.
__________________
Love and Hope
Karen
IDC
DX 1998 STAGE I ER+/ PR+
AC CHEMO TILL FEB 1999
Tamxofin till 2001
2001 exstensive liver mets and mets to lungs
Started weekly taxol
Jan 2002 found out I was strongly HER2POS+++ started herceptin continued with taxol and herceptin till June 2002 then from June 2002 till Jan 2005 just herceptin and Arimidex
2005 Navelbine herceptin had RFA Then back on taxol with herceptin
April 2006 progression again went on clinical trial with tykrerb/herceptin progressed on the started Xeloda/ herceptin
Feb 2007 started Doxil
August 2007 Taxotere,Carboplatin and Herceptin exstensive mets to liver and pancreas
October 2007 Had to stop Carboplatin due to sever allergic reaction
Jan 2008
Stopped Taxotere due to progression now on Gemzar and Herceptin
March 2008 Starting Carboplatin, Abraxane, and Herceptin.
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