Murder Under the Boardwalk

[Becky]

Not far from the Super 7 Motel and clearly on the wrong side of town is Mr. Chills, a dive bar to end all dive bars. Alone in the corner table downing his fifth gin and tonic was Geoffrey.

"God damn it", he exclaimed. "Don't these bloody Yanks have any sense of the refined! I've searched night and day and day and night but there is no market for butlers or valets in a 50 mile radius of this dreary place."

For the moment, the best Geoffrey could do was maid work at the Super 7 down the street. And a hell hole that place was.

"I can't even get bloody maid work at a Ritz Carlton," he angrily whispered to himself.

At that moment, shivering and disheveled walked in Valerie Vavoom.

"Ahh," thought Geoffrey. Things are starting to look up now!

[chrisy]

Suddenly, Valerie felt dirty. The sign in front of the Motel 7 had touted FREE HBO and IN RM J CUZZ, but this place was definitely not the Ritz! Perhaps another chocolate martini to boost her courage...

Thanking God that she had composed herself enough to freshen up her Red hot Red lipstick, she was glad she'd also had the presence of mind to create a makeshift disguise from the torn gray UCSC Fighting Banana Slugs hoody, classic dot ballcap (worn backwards) and her Bucci sunglasses which although unnecessary in the incessant rain, provided a degree of anonymity her publicist would appreciate.

Head held high, Valerie strode boldly toward Mr. Chills...the only bar in Santa Cruz that not only allowed smoking , but encouraged it, particularly the smoking of medicinal substances. Taking a deep breath, she walked through the cloud of blue, fragrant smoke and into the bar.

Inside the bar, the smoke was even thicker, despite the fact that only 3 people were in the place. As far as Valerie could see, that is, with her sunglasses on. Deciding some things were better left unseen, she felt her way to the the bar and hoisted herself onto the cracked red barstool. On a better day, she might have been pleased - it matched her dress - but without the Manolo's the look was somehow incomplete.

A poster child for skateboarding should be a crime punched up a Smashmouth tune from the jukebox before slouching back to his corner booth and burying his head in Thrasher magazine.

Valerie felt more than saw the steely stare coming from the far end of the bar, the man clearly having bagged his 3 drink limit but still going strong. She tried not to notice the slight resemblance to Charles Manson...

Signaling the barman, Valerie glanced up at the television mounted precariously above the bar....

OH MY GOD! NOOOOOOO! she screamed before toppling from her perch to the butt-strewn floor of the bar, not hearing Smashmouth proclaim her a rockstar or ring out "all that glitters is gold" as her Bucci's skittered across the floor, coming to rest under the jukebox

[StephN]

Siena kept up her story.

"You see, Geoffrey can tip a bit over the edge when things don't just go his way. His line of work is rather not so popular in this country. He does not like to depend on me, and I don't like to take his crap when he is out of sorts."

"OK." Det. Rockhead was not sure he followed this at all, but asked her to continue.

"While Geoffrey was waiting for an interview at one of the fancy San Francisco boutique hotels, I was happened upon by someone who needed to leave his dog for a couple of days. Guess I looked the part and he said my hair matched his blond Pomeranian's."

"Don't like where this is going," mused Rockhead.

"Well, as my funds were on the low side, it did not seem cricket to refuse this offer," continued Siena.

"I followed the man into the bar and we made the deal over a drink. Cash on the barrelhead and a ticket to Austin. The furball was waiting at the airport."

"I really don't know why the rest got so complicated," she whined, green eyes getting a bit misty, as she suddenly realized that the dog she had gone through so much to keep safe was no where to be seen.

[chrisy]

Valerie was shaken but not stirred by the developments of the day. First the shocking letter from Danny, then that Agnes at Mr. Rockhead's office - something about her was untrustworthy - and the wild woman in the outer lobby. She could also swear that was Mrs. Ellingfish's pomeranian - although she could think of no reason why Pom Pom would be in such a place.

Valerie, of course, was well acquainted with the Ellingfish family, having worked with Mrs. Ellingfish on the silent auction benefit for the Youth Empowerment Committee for Chinese Hamsters (YECCH). Hmph...silent auction indeed, with that little dustmop yapping throughout the wild boar bourguinione course at dinner. Still, the Ellingfishes had been generous enough to donate that candlelight dinner cruise on their 50 foot yacht, the Compromise.

Oh how she loved those Sunset cruises on the bay...

Valerie was shaken out of her reverie by the skateboarder landing a solid kickflip on his way out of Mr. Chills - and remembered seeing Danny's face, then hers flash on the television screen below the headline "SHOCKING DEATH STUNS SANTA CRUZ SOCIETY", then the strange episode with the stranger and her cell phone.

Remembering she had been on her way to the Motel 7, Valerie decided to first stop at the Salvation Army Thrift store next door, knowing that she frequently donated brand new clothes (sometimes with the tags still attached) so that those less fortunate could aspire to glamour.

As luck would have it, there was indeed a tasteful cream colored suit, with matching mules and baguette! Although it looked as if it had been previously worn, possibly even twice, it was far better than the rainsoaked (and now considerably rumpled) dress she had, and she did after all need some shoes.

Plunking down $35, Valerie changed into the suit behind a row of old sofas (there being no dressing room in the thrift store) and feeling much better, headed back to the Pacer - relieved that the sun was beginning to break through the clouds.

Finally pulling into the Motel 7 down the street, she asked for room 203 and paid the FULL day rate, $73, registering as Mrs. Phoebe Pfrostbite of Thunder Bay, Ontario.

[Colleens_Husband]

Jim Rockhead finally arrived at his office through the back door. Even though his rent was now current, he still used the back door to 'keep in practice' for the inevitable slow times. Jim heard Agnes in the waiting room and he asked her to come into his office.

"Agnes, I have several things I need to discuss with you. First off, Valerie Vavoom paid a huge retainer, so I think it's fair that you keep the Ellingfish reward for yourself. You know I don't pay you regularly so you won't save your money, book a cruise, fall in love with a wealthy foreigner, and have to spend the rest of your life in some awful place like Europe. It's really for your own good. You know I have your best interests at heart."

"Second, I don't think Danny Vavoom is dead. At least the body in the morgue is not Danny Vavoom." Jim paused for a second so that Agnes would have the opportunity to realize how brilliant he was. Pausing ...... pausing ........ pausing .......... nothing .......... and finally ...

"Why do you think that, Jim?" asked Agnes.

"Two reasons, Danny Vavoom was left handed. The police identified the body by the watch that had an inscription on the back. The watch was on the bodies left hand but the watch was a special order left handed watch in which the winding stem came out of the nine o'clock position instead of the three o'clock position of most watches. The watch would have been very difficult to wind if it was worn that way. Someone put this watch on the corpse after the corpse was dead."

"And the second reason?" asked Agnes.

"Yes, the timing doesn't work out." continued Jim, "You see the corpse had bite marks on it's ankle from a small dog. They exactly match the bite marks on my ankle from Pom-Pom when I let that little devil dog out of Mrs. Ellingfish's back yard on the evening of June 14th. Since Danny was last seen on June 13th, how could Danny get the bite marks? That makes the soaking wet young lady who was doing a carpet imitation in the waiting room this morning key to this case since she was the one with that satanic dustmop in her possession."

"Jim, that leaves two questions we need to answer," said Agnes, "Who washed up under the pier last night? And where is Danny Vavoom."

"Brilliant Agnes! And in order to answer both questions we need to find the carpet lady!"

[PinkGirl]

Agnes was a bit embarassed at having called Mr. Rockhead by
his first name. She had never before used his first name and had
to chalk it up to her mental fatigue. Agnes Beasley made a mental
note to take an ativan later that evening and hopefully get a good
night's sleep.

"Mr. Rockhead", Agnes said, "you have told me that the woman on
the carpet identified herself as Sienna Coddingham from London,
England, is that correct?" Agnes, from her days working in the
office at the spray cheese factory, knew that there was also a
London, Ontario in Canada. She knew this from the repeated requests
from a company there to be given a franchise to start a spray cheese
factory in Canada. Agnes was forever indebted to her co-worker
Bertha Hollis who repeatedly helped her with the metric conversion
on the application forms from London, Ontario. Luckily for Agnes, the
requests were always denied and to this day there is no spray cheese
in Canada.

"Yes", replied Jim Rockhead. "She's from London, England and told me
that she came here because her boyfriend Geoffrey is looking for
domestic employment. Apparently Geoff was axed from his job as
Prince Stuart's personal valet." "Hmmmm", Rockhead mused. "There
is a connection here Aggie". "Valerie Vavoom's sister was fooling around
with Prince Stuart and now the woman on the carpet claims to be the
girlfriend of the Prince's former valet". "And, come to think of it, the
carpet woman said he was her ex-boyfriend". Agnes was taking in all
of this information. "I wonder why", Rockhead said, "she would be
helping her ex-boyfriend look for employment, and how did this woman
from London, England end up in Austin, Texas dog sitting an apparently
missing pooch from California?"

Agnes could see that they had a lot of work to do. If only they
could arrange some kind of a meeting with Valerie, Vivian, Sienna,
Geoffrey, Mrs. Ellingfish and the mutt. As far as Agnes knew, the
whereabouts of Vivian, Sienna and Geoffrey were not known.

They had their work cut out for them. Hopefully Sienna would make
contact with the Rockhead Agency and shed some light on the
situation.

Agnes thanked Mr. Rockhead for allowing her to keep the money from
Mrs. Ellingfish. However, it was too much. She gave Mr. Rockhead
$500 and only kept the other half for her back wages.

"If it's alright with you Mr. Rockhead, I will just do some tidying up
in the waiting room and pay a few of our bills before heading home"
inquired Agnes. "I am really tired and need a good night's sleep."

"Of course Aggie" said Rockhead, "you take all the time that you...."
Agnes and Jim both turned towards the top of the stairs. Someone
was crashing up the stairs towards their office ...........

[Becky]

Sienna paced up and down the long corridor of the studio apartment. It was always something with Geoffrey and they weren't even together anymore. That was her decision. He was a lady's man and she couldn't really stand it anymore. Bottom line, he was a world class liar. They had to leave England asap because he was caught with Prince Stuart's latest gal pal Vivian Vavoom. And it wasn't just a smooth. It was a peck alright but not a peck on the cheek. She and the Prince could attest to that.

Vivian was the last straw, the very last straw. What a humiliation!!! At least all the others were assumptions but Vivian was real. All 36-24-36 of her.

But, none-the-less, Sienna left her home to come to the U.S. with Geoffrey. She just decided she couldn't stay with him. She didn't think she could initially get by without him until that poof-ball dog came into her life. What a pain and what a salvation all in one fluffy bundle. But now there was no turning back. The plan was in motion and there was nothing she could do to stop it.

She regretted the weather too. Why did it have to rain so hard, and in Texas no less. She had been a sopping mess in that private detective's office. What a shame because he was awfully cute.

[StephN]

Showered and primped, Siena was still terribly confused and had a list of questions longer than the Tower Bridge.

OK, first she hoped Geoffrey would not come back to this little dive of a place, but she could not be sure he had turned in the key to the manager and did not want to ask.

Next, who in the devil was that man who had approached her about sitting the furball?? Who was he really?? Ned Snodgrass seemed like such a made up name, but she had noticed a lot of weird monikers here in the states. Assume that is an assumed name.

What had she noticed about him, besides his dark good looks and smooth manner. When he picked up his drink he used his left hand. He also wore his watch on the other wrist. THAT was unusual.

He also had a small tatoo on the upper knuckle of his left pinkie. Some kind of an odd pattern of interlocking rings. Where had she seen that before??

Then it came to her. The furball's collar had a similar motif. What the hell? Maybe she was trying too hard to piece this puzzle together.

Better she get something to help her relax, then she might have a clearer picture of what she thought she saw. Maybe a nice crisp gin and tonic would calm her nerves.

The fact that she had felt in danger in the quaint Austin neighborhood, was also unsettling. Who had been following her and why had the pom pooch been so scitzy at the person's scent?

There must be a nice hotel bar around where she could show off her stunning legs as she sipped and ruminated.

[chrisy]

Meanwhile, back in room 203 of the Motel 7, Valerie had exhausted her supply of quarters for the magic fingers. Feeling very relaxed, and very tired - and still slightly bedraggled from the rainy adventures of the day, she decided a refreshing bath would be in order. Stepping into the bathroom, she was APPALLED to see that the advertised "jacuzz" was nothing but a small bathtub with a single jet! What a dump this place was.

Despite the strange phone call from Jim Rockhead, he had not met her in a few hours as planned and it was now nearly 5 o'clock. "Well, I'm not getting stood up by that lowlife PI", she fumed, and decided it would be a good time to go home for a real bath. Then she'd go back and return the car. She left the key in the room, coaxed Rockhead's old beater to life, and headed for her luxurious home with a real jacuzzi overlooking the bay.

Calling it "her" home was a slight exaggeration, she was actually renting her beach bungalow to Mrs. Ellingfish and was staying at one of the several houses owned by her friend Sharkey, the wealthy surf bum who had made his fortune selling skateboard wheels and speculating in real estate. He was known as a bottom-feeder, never having paid more than 50% of market price for a house, always just beating the realtor (whom he referred to as "land pimps") to the deal. She'd never known him to sell any of this properties, thus he had numerous homes available to let to friends at reasonable rents, in Valerie's case, free.

The rent from the Ellingfishes was all that was keeping Valerie going - having run through most of her cash trying to keep Danny one step ahead of the loan sharks. She shuddered as she remembered the TV picture above the bar at Mr. Chills.

Valerie arrived home and was greeted at the door by Ferrari, her long haired dachshund-labrador mix (so named because his hind legs were considerably longer than his front legs thereby giving him the jacked-up look of a racecar). Ferrari was a delightful companion, so well tempered and loving. Not at all like that pom, Pom Pom. She knew secrets about Pom Pom, for example, Pom Pom was not a purebred pomeranian, but was in fact a cross between a pom and a bichon-frisse. Valerie almost laughed out loud at how she had convinced the Ellingfish woman that mutt was AKC registered!

Dog breeding was Valerie's secret passion, and soon, she hoped, would make her a wealthy celebrity in her own right (not just another Santa Cruz socialite spending daddy's money). She would finally get the respect she so craved, and deserved once she introduced her new breed of dog - the pompador - to the world as the newest animal star in the next Harry Potter movie.

That was how she had become involved with Geoffrey...whoever he was...
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