my mom

[juanita]

on new years eve my mom had another heart attack and is in the hospital. she had her first heart attack about 25 years ago and has had many surgeries, heart attacks, strokes, etc... since then. since she was just 40 when she had that first one and her dad died at age 34 of the same thing as i reached those ages i really freaked out. but i made it to 45 with no heart problems and am crossing my fingers i can keep it that way. she had a test on friday that didn't go well, her heart was beating so fast it was a solid black line on the monitor, and they had to stop the test. now they are planning a heart cath and angioplast with hopefully a stint put in tomorrow, but they say there's so much scar tissue from past times that they might not be able to do much. and then tuesday she is getting a pacemaker put in. i've never gotten used to all of this and am really obsessing about the next few days. i've taken tomorrow off already and will probably go tuesday as well. i just ask for a prayer for my mom that all goes well with this tomorrow, as i'm sure it probably will. i just can't help thinking about the times in the past when it didn't. i don't mean to sound like a big baby, I JUST DON"T WANT TO LOSE MY MOMMY!