Please pray for me/us...

[MGordon]

Hello Angels -

I've kinda been "online dormant" the last few weeks and hopefully you'll understand after read this thread - trust me - it is not because I do not think and pray for all of you, all of you, but life has a way of being a handful sometimes - and when too many things happen, my online life has to take a backseat. I still lurk and pray though!

I almost hate to ask again already, but I really need some prayer support. I just got home from the hospital (1:00 am Local) - yet again - this time for Lisa's mom, again. I swear I know this hospital better than anyone who works there - wanna know a shortcut from point A to point B or C or D or... - just ask Mel.

Lisa's mom, Frances, is 83 now and after losing her husband and Lisa within two months of each other she's losing her will to live. I do not want to go into to too many details, just pray for her. I've been trying to be her caregiver, but I still have to work and I can't be there enoguh. I try - I go over every morning for an hour or so and go straight there after work too, but right now it's not working. She's really down physically and emotionally and it now looks like I have to move her into skilled nursing and/or assisted living - but even then I do not think she wants to continue - I don't even have much confidence she'll last through the night - willpower is EVERYTHING, well next to faith, hope and love.

The local centers have a wait list over 6 months, but Drs are trying to help us bypass the list. I'm still in the middle of trying to settle the estate from when Buddy, (Frances' husband) died (obviously Lisa didn't quite finish that one and I JUST got power of attorney for Frances) and I am still trying to settle Lisa's estate as well - not to mention more bills than I can shake a stick at. Don't misinterupt - financially I just fine for now - it is just REALLY hard to write checks to hospital/cancer center/hospice. I wanna scream out - BUT YOU FAILED US HOW CAN YOU BILL ME. I know, I know - logical Mel not emotion... Y'all know how much chemo and PET scans and radiation and adjuvant therapies and... and... and... cost - but I'm just not there enough mentally to look upon these as bills. These were my hopes and dreams, not just bills.

I just don't know if I can handle three deaths in just under 6 months. I ty to be strong, but I'm really having trouble right now. So please, if you have a chance, pray for Frances - and pray for me too - please. Gawd - every 2 months another death I'm dealing with - and I'm starting to crack and I don't want to shatter. To be honest I don't know why my employer keeps me on - much less gives me the raise I just got.

I'm sorry - I am starting to ramble and I'm crying too hard to type. Please - just pray for Frances - and me too!

Thanks
Love and Light
Mel