I think I'm in for a sleepless night

[Faith in Him]

I waited in all day to see if I heard any news from the Onc. about my scan. At 5:30 I knew the office was closed so I went to grab something to eat with the family.

At 6:00, Onc left a vague message. Usually if it is good news he says so. Now I'm scared. Urghh. I wish he had not left a message at all and just called tomorow.

[Chelee]

Oh how I feel for you. My 1st onc did almost that same thing to me once. Being stage IIIA with 5 positive nodes I was really concerned. He left me a message & it scared me to death. Normally he would say "all is well".

When I got into see him the following day...I told him how his called had me so stressed out I couldn't sleep. He then apologized and said he wasn't thinking. (Gee thanks!) He just said he wanted to go over my results in person due to some other benign issues...but all was fine. So as hard as it is...try not to panic yet. But shame on your onc for doing that to you. I hear this complaint far to often...you would think these onc's of all people would know better. I'd rather they leave NO message than to do what they did to you. Hang in there & I hope they get back to you 1st thing in the morning. Sending positive energy your way.

Chelee

[harrie]

I wish these medical offices would really appreciate the stress in waiting and worse yet getting an unclear message. If they would ONLY start out the left message by saying something like "the results are good, but please return the call so we can .....". Makes all the difference in the world.

Sometimes when I would be waiting for results and stressing out, I would try really hard to shift my thoughts to this: Until I hear otherwise, I am going to appreciate this moment of being considered clear and free.

[Jackie07]

Good advice, Harrie.

I think anxiety mostly comes from our past experience. I remember when my neurologist's secretary called me at work just after my CT scan (back in 1990 because of my chronic and insertion headaches), my boss got all hyped up: "You just had your CT scan, and they called you right away for an appointment tomorrow. You need to ask them what's going on."

Of course, the secretary would not tell me anything. So we waited for another 24 hours and saw the doctor in the afternoon the next day. And I was actually quite happy to learn about my huge brain tumor - it proved that I was not 'lazy' as most of my family members and my coaches had thought about me sometimes. And I certainly did not need a referral to a psychiatrist as my first family doctor had suggested (We switched to another doctor and pressed for more exams and finally found the tumor 7 months later.)

After being excited for a couple of days - showing my CT scans around and looking up medical journals on my rare type of brain tumor - I finally experienced a few sleepless nights, mainly because I started to imagine how the surgical knife's going to cut into my scalp...

So, when I was told about having breast cancer and needed to have lumpectomy (and four years later, I opted for bilateral mastectomy when the cancer recurred), I took the surgeries in stride. Also, the second time I had chemo, I was actually working full-time...

Knowlege is power. Even though sometimes too much knowlege causes us unecessary worries, in the end it is often knowlege that eases our fears.

I am keeping my fingers crossed for you.

[Pam P]

I agree with Harrie's advice.... hard as it is to do sometimes. When we're worried our mind tends to interpret everything to the bad news... it could be nothing at all to worry about. I hope you are able to get the full report from your onc. early today. Let us know when you do. (I hope you got a little sleep!)

[Lien]

Oh that's so stupid! Even if it's probably nothing (he wouldn't have left a message if the news was really bad, would he?) it scares the heck out of us.

I once had a pap smear and was called back. The appointment wasn't until 10 days later and all that time I was so scared (I was 22 at the time). Turned out there weren't enough cells in the specimen, so they had to redo the test. I'd had an HPV infection (thank you boyfriend for sleeping with someone else, unprotected) and was told that my risk for cervical cancer was high. I was hopping mad afterwards. Insensitive idiots!

Well, let's hope that your onc was just stupid or thinking about something else and never thought you could be worried because there's nothing seriously wrong with you.

Hugs

Jacqueline

[schoolteacher]

Thinking of you. Let us know when you hear from the Oncologists.

Amelia

[Mary Anne in TX]

Hang in there girl! And please let us know what he says!
I'm praying for good news and peace of mind....but I totally understand the anxiety! ma

[Faith in Him]

Thanks, girls. Funny enough, I did get some sleep. I just got to the point where I thought it is what it is. I'll deal with that tomorrow.

[harrie]

Thats the way to go Faith. Why waste a good day being concerned when there may or may not be a valid to do so later. Plus remember, every good day is a precious day and not to go unappreciated.

[juanita]

i think doctors need to be more sensitive to what their patients might be feeling and not do some of the things they do like this message.