[Mary Jo]

Hi Elizabeth - I just read your post and would love to share my experience with you. I was dx in June 2005. Stage 2B. Had right breast mastectomy in July of 2005. Started chemo in August 2005. When chemo and radiation were finished a "suspicious" area of calcification was found near my chest wall in my left breast. I had a biopsy and it was benign, however, at that point I decided I wanted that breast removed. So in March 2006 I had a prophylactic left breast mastectomy. By October 2006 all surgeries, chemo, radiation and herceptin were over. Now I had to learn to live with my new normal and that was hard for me. Reconstruction was NEVER something I thought about doing. I could never have dealt with all that while going through everything else. Especially psychologically. No way! My main goal at this point was to become healthy and strong once again. Not having breasts was never an issue for me....NEVER. I was happy with breasts and I was happy without. I wanted to live again - I wanted to be healthy and I was determined to put this all behind me and to move forward with all I had learned and to start to give back. --- Fast forward to 2008! Maybe reconstruction is something I might consider. I am now 48 years young ( in 2008 that is - today I am 51) I started to think that maybe this was something I could do for me. So, I started to do my homework. After learning all I could I realized that DIEP was the only option right for me. I was afraid of implants and being 3 years out from dx realized DIEP was a natural and good option for me. I met with my wonderful plastic surgeon, Dr. John Hijjawi in Milwaukee, WI at Froedtert and my decision was validated. It WAS a great option for me. I was healthy and strong, both physically and emotionally. So I decided that yes, I was going to do this for me. Not to make me happier - not because I didn't feel whole. Just because I could. You see, I was happier than I had ever been.....actually felt more whole than before cancer. Being (as I would always say) breastless, was ok with me....ok with my hubby....we were fine! But then I thought, why shouldn't I do this for me. What a gift to give myself. After much prayer and soul searching I went ahead with the surgery and in June 2008 had delayed bilateral DIEP. It was a complete success with no complications whatsoever. Cosmetically speaking "they" were/are beautiful. As I had no regrets being breastless, I now have no regrets having had the surgery. It was right. However, dealing with all the "other stuff" first was what I needed to do. I needed to heal physically and especially, emotionally first.

Elizabeth, in some small way I hope my story helps you. I will pray and ask God to lead you to the right decision. If you have any questions please contact me.

Gods peace and love hold you close.

Mary Jo