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Andrea Barnett Budin · 06-07-2016, 12:12 PM

You're very thoughtful, Valerie. Karen has spoken of you to me. Her loss to us all is great and I will never ever forget her.

She was in her 6th yr of fighting and it was hard. I know everyone here understands what hard is. There is just nothing like it. All these yrs after being on chemo, I still suffer from of the nasty side effects and vividly recall in amazement how I got through it.

We do what we must. I saw it as a process. I would struggle through it somehow, sometimes literally one hour at a time, then I got back to one day at a time. I saw myself far, far into the future.

I imagined myself at my 1 yr old granddaughter's Bat Mitzvah (which occurs at age 13). I would be there! I vowed it and envisioned it in detail. I was standing at a round table surrounded by family and friends. I looked radiant. Aglow. Music was playing and we were all clapping, waiting for the Bat Mitzvah girl to come on to the dance floor. Make her entrance. I felt such love and pride and joy!

Well, I lived to see that day!! I lived my dream. Now I have new dreams. That granddaughter is now finishing her 1st yr in college. She is 19.

I was 50 at orig dx. I am now 71.

I wish success to all my Sisters.

Valerie, I am here for you! Absolutely. Any time. My email is within my info. Please feel free to email me any time. We can chat.

Put HER2 SISTER in the subject line so I will not delete the email. I will respond. It is my honor to help in any way I can.

That goes for anyone on this board. I am here for you. I want to be. It brings me a sense of worth, using all the knowledge I've accrued through this thing called cancer.

Put my name in the search and see my articles through the yrs. I bet some will be helpful, inspirational, maybe even interesting.

I do send love to you all. You are always in my thoughts. In past yrs, when Joe was our webmaster, there were times the site would go down. As a regular, one who checked in at least once a day, every day, I would be aghast. I had no access to my support group !!!!!!!!!!

Then finally, the site would get back on line and so many others were out there, hanging on, waiting just like me.

We're here to support one another. I most definitely am! Any time!

XOXOXO, Andi

06-07-2016, 12:12 PM	#40
Andrea Barnett Budin Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: LAND OF YES! w/home in Boca Raton, Florida Orig from L.I., N.Y. Ever hovering IN THE NOW... Posts: 1,904	Re: Karen has moved on You're very thoughtful, Valerie. Karen has spoken of you to me. Her loss to us all is great and I will never ever forget her. She was in her 6th yr of fighting and it was hard. I know everyone here understands what hard is. There is just nothing like it. All these yrs after being on chemo, I still suffer from of the nasty side effects and vividly recall in amazement how I got through it. We do what we must. I saw it as a process. I would struggle through it somehow, sometimes literally one hour at a time, then I got back to one day at a time. I saw myself far, far into the future. I imagined myself at my 1 yr old granddaughter's Bat Mitzvah (which occurs at age 13). I would be there! I vowed it and envisioned it in detail. I was standing at a round table surrounded by family and friends. I looked radiant. Aglow. Music was playing and we were all clapping, waiting for the Bat Mitzvah girl to come on to the dance floor. Make her entrance. I felt such love and pride and joy! Well, I lived to see that day!! I lived my dream. Now I have new dreams. That granddaughter is now finishing her 1st yr in college. She is 19. I was 50 at orig dx. I am now 71. I wish success to all my Sisters. Valerie, I am here for you! Absolutely. Any time. My email is within my info. Please feel free to email me any time. We can chat. Put HER2 SISTER in the subject line so I will not delete the email. I will respond. It is my honor to help in any way I can. That goes for anyone on this board. I am here for you. I want to be. It brings me a sense of worth, using all the knowledge I've accrued through this thing called cancer. Put my name in the search and see my articles through the yrs. I bet some will be helpful, inspirational, maybe even interesting. I do send love to you all. You are always in my thoughts. In past yrs, when Joe was our webmaster, there were times the site would go down. As a regular, one who checked in at least once a day, every day, I would be aghast. I had no access to my support group !!!!!!!!!! Then finally, the site would get back on line and so many others were out there, hanging on, waiting just like me. We're here to support one another. I most definitely am! Any time! XOXOXO, Andi __________________ Andi BB '95 post-meno dx Invasive LOBULAR w/9cm tumor! YIKES + 2/21 nodes. Clear mammo 10 mnths earlier. Mastec/tram flap reconst/PORT/8 mnths chemo (4Adria/8CMF). Borderline ER/PR. Tamoxifen 2 yrs. Felt BLESSED. I could walk and talk, feed and bathe myself! I KNEW I would survive... '98 -- multiple mets to liver. HER2+ 80%. ER/PR- Raging, highly aggressive tumors spreading fast. New PORT. 9 mnths Taxotere Fought fire w/fire! Pronounced in cautious remission 5/99. Taxotere weekly for 6 wks, 2 wks off -- for 9 mnths. TALK ABOUT GRUELING! (I believe they've altered that protocol since those days -- sure hope so!!) + good old Vit H wkly for 1st 3 yrs, then triple dosage ev 3 wks for 7 yrs more... The "easy" chemo, right?! Not a walk in the park, but not a freight train coming at 'ya either... Added Herceptin Nov '98 (6 wks after FDA fast-tracked it for met bc). Stayed w/Vit H till July '08! Now I AM FREE! Humbly and eternally grateful for this life-saving drug! NED since '99 and planning on keeping it that way. To hell w/poor prognosis and nasty stats! STOPPED VIT H JULY '08...! REMAIN STABLE... Eternally grateful...Yes is a world & in this world of yes live (skillfully curled) all worlds ... (e e cummings) EVERY DAY I BEAT MY PREVIOUS RECORD FOR # OF CONSECUTIVE DAYS I'VE STAYED ALIVE. Smile KNOWING you too can be a miracle. Up to me and God now...