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Andrea Barnett Budin · 07-07-2012, 08:13 AM

I was 4th stage w/a 9 cm tumor that required mastectomy and the removal of 21 lymph nodes. 3 yrs later I recurred and was, glumly told -- WHAT YOU HAVE IS INOPERABLE, INCURABLE AND YOU WILL BE ON LONG TERM CHEMO THERAPY FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE. I was devastated. Generally positive and full of belief, I crashed. The rest of my life looked like I wouldn't last past the expiration date on the milk in my refrigerator!

Then I saw other oncs. One said, What you have may be inoperable but that's a good thing. You'll be strong to take the chemo. You're young (I was 53 then) and in good health -- I silently laughed, Just a little cancer is all -- you'll do just fine, said onc #2. And regarding incurable, he said, Cancer is a chronic condition. You have flare ups, we treat, you get better. And he recommended Navelbine as it was a kinder gentler drug than the Taxol the first onc recommended.

Onc #3 recommended (in '98) Taxotere. Herceptin had JUST been approved, fast-tracked by the FDA a month after my metastasis and was added 2 mnths later, to verify the effectiveness of the chemo (checked by CT scan @ 8 wks). I asked this onc why Taxotere? I was of course a confused lay person fighting for her life.

Because what you have is a highly aggressive form of cancer and Taxotere is the most aggressive weapon we have right now in our arsenal. It was clear to me that I needed to fight fire with fire. Take the harder road. Give it my best shot.

The docs thought I had a year. 5 at the most. Less than a 15% chance of survival.

I have outlived my prognosis. Outlived my wonderful breast surgeon's life, may he rest in peace. Outlived a cancer center here in Boca. Lived to see both my dghtrs marry. Lived to see not 1 but 5 grandkids come into this world and be a part of their lives!

I don't think, Delaney -- such a beautiful name -- that you have an expiration date stamped on your foot!

See yourself far, far into the future. Believe with every day that you are going to be healthy and well. That you will survive. And thrive. Talk to your body all day. Tell it -- cause it is programmed to listen to your commands -- HEALTHY AND WELL. NO MORE CANCER. That's what I do to this day.

Look for the good signs. The love and support of your beloved family should keep you buoyed. Reach for outstanding results, for them, and of course, for yourself. You are a blessed Soul!

Sending you Love and Light,
Andi

07-07-2012, 08:13 AM	#17
Andrea Barnett Budin Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: LAND OF YES! w/home in Boca Raton, Florida Orig from L.I., N.Y. Ever hovering IN THE NOW... Posts: 1,904	Look for the good signs I was 4th stage w/a 9 cm tumor that required mastectomy and the removal of 21 lymph nodes. 3 yrs later I recurred and was, glumly told -- WHAT YOU HAVE IS INOPERABLE, INCURABLE AND YOU WILL BE ON LONG TERM CHEMO THERAPY FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE. I was devastated. Generally positive and full of belief, I crashed. The rest of my life looked like I wouldn't last past the expiration date on the milk in my refrigerator! Then I saw other oncs. One said, What you have may be inoperable but that's a good thing. You'll be strong to take the chemo. You're young (I was 53 then) and in good health -- I silently laughed, Just a little cancer is all -- you'll do just fine, said onc #2. And regarding incurable, he said, Cancer is a chronic condition. You have flare ups, we treat, you get better. And he recommended Navelbine as it was a kinder gentler drug than the Taxol the first onc recommended. Onc #3 recommended (in '98) Taxotere. Herceptin had JUST been approved, fast-tracked by the FDA a month after my metastasis and was added 2 mnths later, to verify the effectiveness of the chemo (checked by CT scan @ 8 wks). I asked this onc why Taxotere? I was of course a confused lay person fighting for her life. Because what you have is a highly aggressive form of cancer and Taxotere is the most aggressive weapon we have right now in our arsenal. It was clear to me that I needed to fight fire with fire. Take the harder road. Give it my best shot. The docs thought I had a year. 5 at the most. Less than a 15% chance of survival. I have outlived my prognosis. Outlived my wonderful breast surgeon's life, may he rest in peace. Outlived a cancer center here in Boca. Lived to see both my dghtrs marry. Lived to see not 1 but 5 grandkids come into this world and be a part of their lives! I don't think, Delaney -- such a beautiful name -- that you have an expiration date stamped on your foot! See yourself far, far into the future. Believe with every day that you are going to be healthy and well. That you will survive. And thrive. Talk to your body all day. Tell it -- cause it is programmed to listen to your commands -- HEALTHY AND WELL. NO MORE CANCER. That's what I do to this day. Look for the good signs. The love and support of your beloved family should keep you buoyed. Reach for outstanding results, for them, and of course, for yourself. You are a blessed Soul! Sending you Love and Light, Andi __________________ Andi BB '95 post-meno dx Invasive LOBULAR w/9cm tumor! YIKES + 2/21 nodes. Clear mammo 10 mnths earlier. Mastec/tram flap reconst/PORT/8 mnths chemo (4Adria/8CMF). Borderline ER/PR. Tamoxifen 2 yrs. Felt BLESSED. I could walk and talk, feed and bathe myself! I KNEW I would survive... '98 -- multiple mets to liver. HER2+ 80%. ER/PR- Raging, highly aggressive tumors spreading fast. New PORT. 9 mnths Taxotere Fought fire w/fire! Pronounced in cautious remission 5/99. Taxotere weekly for 6 wks, 2 wks off -- for 9 mnths. TALK ABOUT GRUELING! (I believe they've altered that protocol since those days -- sure hope so!!) + good old Vit H wkly for 1st 3 yrs, then triple dosage ev 3 wks for 7 yrs more... The "easy" chemo, right?! Not a walk in the park, but not a freight train coming at 'ya either... Added Herceptin Nov '98 (6 wks after FDA fast-tracked it for met bc). Stayed w/Vit H till July '08! Now I AM FREE! Humbly and eternally grateful for this life-saving drug! NED since '99 and planning on keeping it that way. To hell w/poor prognosis and nasty stats! STOPPED VIT H JULY '08...! REMAIN STABLE... Eternally grateful...Yes is a world & in this world of yes live (skillfully curled) all worlds ... (e e cummings) EVERY DAY I BEAT MY PREVIOUS RECORD FOR # OF CONSECUTIVE DAYS I'VE STAYED ALIVE. Smile KNOWING you too can be a miracle. Up to me and God now... Last edited by Andrea Barnett Budin; 07-07-2012 at 11:12 AM..