[Colleens_Husband]

Jackie:

With all due respect, are you trying to provoke a fight? God knows that I tried to keep quite about the royal wedding but you invoked my name in your thread. I even hid in the bunker to avoid the whole Royal Hoot-a-nanny. What is a guy like me supposed to do?

Yes, it did look like the United Kingdom declared a silly hat day. I can hear it now,

"Honey, I got a cheese wheel lodged in my skull."
"Is it stinky cheese?"
"We are British and don't bathe regularly, how can one tell?"
"Good point dear, why don't we leave it in till Friday and you can wear it to the wedding."
"Brilliant idea! Just Brilliant!"

And what is wrong with Kate Middleton? Doesn't she have any standards? Does she have blurry eyesight? After all she is marrying the hellspawn of Chuck the Chimp and Lady Dead. I am sure she can do much better than marrying into a family of upperclass German twits. The royals have faces made for radio. There isn't a chin on the whole lot of them. And those scary teeth! With all the money they have one would think they could afford modern dentistry. How much inbreeding is required to produce chicklets the size of fence planks. Half the royal family can floss with a bicycle chain.

The only royal who shouldn't come with a warning label is Prince Harry, and this is just a guess, but I think he needs to go onto the Maury Povich Show to find out who his real dad is.

And what about Princess Eugenie? The main difference between her and a horse is that the princess has slightly more facial hair. She is not an attractive woman.

And as an American, why would I care about the Royal Family. After all we fought two wars so that we could proudly ignore these snobs, you know, the whole land of the free, home of the brave, Yankee Doodle thing. Isn't being American antithetical to the whole concept that some people are born better than others? And just what measuring stick are they using to declare themselves better than others. Were their ancestors better skilled at fratricide than mine? Were their ancestors more morale than mine? Or were their ancestors more ruthless, barbaric, and warlike than mine in the sixth century?

I am not going to a royal wedding until one of those twits come to one of our family's weddings. It is only fair.

I'm just saying......