Hello Carolyn,
I don't have experience with that particular cocktail, but I found this link regarding a study of this combo. You will probably get responses from someone who has first-hand knowledge.
http://patient.cancerconsultants.com....aspx?id=33206
It also strikes me from your post that in addition to having much to LIVE for, you also have much to be hopeful about. It seems that you have not been "heavily treated" - from your post it looks like your only chemo was the CAF in 1988, and now recently the Femara + ?.
Being ER/PR and HER2 postive, there would be many targets and options for treatment of the metastatic disease, and you have reason to hope that this can be managed for a very long time. If I understand your post, it sounds like you had both response and progression while on the Femara and (50% lapatinib) trial, possibly you were in the Femara only arm and just need something to whack down the Her-2 pathway. Given this possibility, your onc is right to get you onto the Herceptin.
I had Taxol/Carboplatin/Herceptin for extensive liver mets, but people have success with different combos. The important thing to remember is that there are lots of options - and it is definitely a plus that you are feeling so good now! You should be much better able to handle whatever chemo you need to throw at this.
You also mentioned you have been visiting this site; if so you are probably aware there are many here who are beating the odds and staying around to see their babies have babies of their own! This can be true for you, too. You've beaten this thing down before - you will again
Hugs and prayers,
Chris