Hi Juanita -
Not crying is maybe NOT a bad thing. It may not mean that your are stuffing your emotions down inside you, but that you are finding other outlets for them. And are just a braver person than many.
Some of us just become stronger - and some of us actually were "strong" women emotionally prior to our cancer diagnosis.
Lots of things happen to our family and close friends that fall to us to handle over the years. These situations can help set us up for bearing bad news of our own with more grace and acceptance than may be apparent to others not in our shoes.
Not shedding tears may mean that you are not wallowing in self pity, but that you are going on with your life as best you can. (I know I do that!) I think I cried over the realization that I would be weakened and have to spend a lot of time under treatment, and what I would miss because of that. I did not at first focus on the type of BC that I had - I just wanted to start dealing with it. Some of us BC patients get angry and this is another outlet for emotions. Some of us may focus more love and affection on our families, which is another outlet. Some may find new hobbies such as writing or art or music. Many of us start taking more walks or other physical activity.
You know that Herceptin has been a good friend and is there should you need it again. Some women going off treatment feel "out on a llimb," but you should be followed somewhat closely as well as monitoring your own body for symptoms. You know that you have this group to come to any time.
Congratulations on completing your treatment. Now try to keep your focus on the road ahead and the things you want to take care of or accomplish. This was one of my best ways to forget - to try to catch up with all the things that were left in the dust because I had to deal with this disease.
|