Lyn

Hi Tricia, that was interesting, I too have Fibroymalgia, started about 3 years back so I take the anti-depressant Prothieden 25mg, I sleep well but still get depressed, so doubled it to 50 and after dropping the Aromasin eostrogen blocker I got that depressed I was looking forward to the hereafter, bear in mind I have been doing this non stop since 1998, I also have pain from the collapse of my left shoulder and now the dislocation of my right shoulder, so with that and getting my rotten biopsy result I was a basket case for about a week, I just sat in a fog and didn't want to do anything, and just thought well I could be dead tomorrow so I don't care if the washing doesn't get hung out, with both my shoulders just about stuffed there was no way I was in the mood to stand out in the sun, getting up and down on a step, nope she sat there until someone else in the house decided to throw it in the dryer. I feel better this week, after I did more research on my BC, I started out strongly HER +3, the biopsy in January on my remaining breast was HER +2 and now my recent biopsy on same breast after failing treatment was HER 1-2, so either the Herceptin is slowing down the cancer in the body or it is just unstable. My initial BC was very agressive and fast moving, yet this reoccurence in the remaining breast has been smouldering since January this year. So is my shoulder pain also fibroymalgia, my mixed connective tissue disorder (Lupus/Sjrogens/sclelederma? and anything else that wants to join in, but all relevant I think to our weird types of unpredictable BC. All of these immune deficiency disorders are trying to kill our bodies along with the big C, so hopefully they will kill each other off and just leave me alone. I found that breathing in the healing and out with the cancer cells was a good chant, I also use to tell myself at night "just go to sleep, the problems will still be there to morrow but I will face them better after a good night's sleep" seem to work, I also use to say, "Good Night Silent Angels" just so I didn't forget anyone. During the day, I loved to wander through the junk shops, I own a lot of odd chairs, a bit of a sore point in my home, everytime I see a chair when I am out, just about everyone screams at me you don't need anymore chairs, but I figure there is always a seat in my home for anyone who comes. Also when people ask what I want for a present, I say "buy me a clock, that way you are buying me time, and add I don't need anymore watches, I am flat out reading the little figures on the watches anyway. But as far a carrying on, I just think, how sad it would be for everyone to go to my funeral, so I just say to myself well I am going to be here for a long time, so by the time I do go, it will be thank God that old bag has gone, she was a real pain in the neck, racing around in her hotted up scooter with the skull and cross bones flying, you see I am not going to grow old gracefully, I intend to make a difference to the meaning of old age. Well there is heaps more I can ramble on with but I better get dinner now for the family, trouble is I have always looked well through my treatments, except of course for this last bad radiaiton burn, but apart from that, they all think I can cope, I have to act some days that I am not well, just to get a bit of sympathy. Love to you all.

Love & Hugs Lyn