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Hi everyone:
I really have to agree with the poster who said that the oncologists really don't prepare you for what "menopause" means when it is brought on by chemo.
I thought that I would be (if I even went through it because I was pretty confident that I wouldn't!!!) experiencing some hot flashes. By some I mean maybe 5 or 6 a day. I actually envisioned that they might be somewhat pleasant because I am typically a "cold" person and feeling extra warm for a few times a day might be pretty good because I work in an office where everyone likes the temp down..... NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
No one mentioned that I wouldn't be able to have ENJOYABLE sex. Probably for the rest of my life!!!!!!!!!!! This is not a minor side effect as far as I am concerned. I certainly hope that the non-challant attitude isn't because as women we are labled as not as sexually inclined?! as men according to the medical establishment. (Although I suspect if men were told that this was "the last time they could do it EVER enjoyably" - there would be a screeching outcry)
Lubricants as far as I am concerned don't do it. Even when I was pre-menopausal I didn't like them. Lubricants are more "sticky" than naturally produced lubricant. And more importantly MORE isn't produced as you need it, instead the stuff gets thinner so that you actually have a time limit before you screech to an unpleasant hault. "Tolerating" the act doesn't do anything for me physically or emotionally.
Bottom line: Libedo loss is a VERY big side effect. We should know about it and make our decisions about losing it. Relationships, love, pleasure are all major parts of our lives. There is nothing minor about being taken by surprise by this side effect. It is CRIMINAL that I, ( and from the looks of it many others) weren't informed about what we were in for. After all, chemo only helps a small percentage of women survive compared to the percentage that are saved by surgery alone.... ( I mean in the adjuvant stage, which statistically the bulk of bc patients initially fall). There are women that might make different choices when faced with the ramifications of the chemo choice. And I beleive in only fully informed choices. Chemo menopause is NOT equal/the same as natural menopause. Don't delude us into thinking it is.
Thanks for letting me rant,
Happy New Year
Merridith
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