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Hi Merridith, looks like we have all been wanting to discuss this but no one actually new how to put it out there. I went through early menopause at about 44 not long after I started chemo in 1998, brought on by the chemo and then had to have my tubes tied to make sure I didn't get pregnant as I could no longer take contraceptives. My sister is 12 months older than me and still hasn't gone through it. The loss of libido in my case is not only due to the hormone loss but the extensive surgery I had, a radical mastectomy, I still do not like my partner seeing me undressed even with a singlet on, making things worse is he is 12 years younger than me but we have been together 17 years so there is a lot of things contributing to my libido loss. Pain and discomfort is the other thing, after all this time I have only just gone to the Health Food Shop and bought an all natural cream for intimacy as I put it, a bit like young guys buying condoms for the first time and end up with asprin, my sisters complain that their partners are never in the mood, I told them I try and sneak into bed so I don't wake mine up, as thoughtful as he is I still feel like a dried up prune, that together with hair loss 3 times it wears a bit thin looking like a Picaso and my daughter affectionately calls me Aunti Fester from the Adams Family, I used to look like an alien to her when she was younger so with all this going on and continual drug therapy, including numb feet and finger tips, is it any wonder our libido abandoned ship. I am not trying to boast here but before this BC curse I used to turn heads, now it is for other reasons, it is pity. The worst time was when I went to the local police station and while standing there in line the reflection in the 2 way mirror was of an old boyfriend I hadn't seen in almost 20 years, he hadn't changed but me, I was just about bald the size of a beach ball from steroids, in lycra cycle pants and a huge T shirt, my wardrobe at the time, I was relieved when my name wasn't mentioned and I slipped out of their like a cat burglar, so hopefully after I have another attempt of reconstruction next year I may be on the right track but it looks like we need more input into this subject.
Love & Hugs Lyn
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