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Upon initial diagnosis, (Stage 3a, 16 nodes pos, left mos radical, right simple with .25cm tumour found, her2 pos, ER/PR weakly pos) I was not given, nor did I ask for prognosis. I was told that this was very aggressive cancer and was treated as such.
When I finished my treatment, my oncologist told me that should I get a recurrance he could not offer me any curative treatment only management. Most importantly, I was to choose to go on living. Not an easy challenge. I discovered a mass in my upper abdomen 6 months later and a liver US confirmed mets I went back to my oncologist and he began to outline my options. Knowing that chemo could offer me no cure, at the time I wasn't interested in 'big gun' chemos, didn't want to go through the hairloss thing again and all the other unpleasantries that go along with most chemo. So I asked him- what if I choose nothing? He said that I would have about 6 months- that didn't really surprise me, I actually thought I would have less than that. Then he said that I didn't have to have chemo, I could just have herceptin if I wanted, though he could not tell me that I would have more than 6 mos with treatment, he did say it would improve my quality of life(QOL). So I resigned to the fact that my days were limited and believed that God has a purpose for my life and my hope was in hands rather than the hands of man.
Eight months later at CT showed new activity in my liver and some evidence of lymphangytic disease in my lungs, so I opted for adding navelbine to the mix which was supposed to be well tolerated. After 3 cycles I was unimpressed with QOL so we stopped it and took a 4 week break. Well that break was extended to 8 weeks because my sister had an aggressive brain tumour removed and it was Christmas. By the time I saw my onc again, I was not feeling great and my CT indicated some larger nodules in both lung bases. With the progress of the beast staring in my face again, I elected to try something more aggressive and am currently on taxotere and herceptin.
I still believe that only God really knows my prognosis, but He also gave me a mind to make choices and so I have.
I believe that we have the right to know our prognosis. I think I understand why many oncologists are reluctant to share such since it is so difficult to say how long. There are so many factors- tumour aggression, pre or post menopausal, where mets are- bone being the lest life threatening place for mets, liver and lung are more life threatening.
I do know that my life will never be the same. Time with my children 13,11,9 and my dear husband, is more important than washing the kitchen floor. I will continue to choose to go on living. But I have peace that when my life work is ended I shall be healed!
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