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Old 04-17-2014, 06:08 PM   #12
IrvineFriend
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Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Irvine, CA (Southern CA)
Posts: 414
Re: KNOWINGS, Expectations and Assumptions

Andi,

Again, thanks for a great "Cliff Notes" of this book. I especially loved this ...

"Get as far away from this disturbed person (your inner roommate) as you possibly can. I know it's stuck in your head. So if your inner roommate were an actual person you'd probably learn to ignore them. They could drive you nuts! See how often this person changes their mind, how conflicted they are on so many subjects, how emotionally overreactive they tend to be?? You wouldn't put up with a friend who gave you so much bad advice and caused you to suffer so often."

The "you'd probably learn to ignore them" which is so true! We're so hard on ourselves, almost like as humans we're programmed to be SO hard on ourselves and then others. I'm looking forward to reading this ... hello Amazon (again). Sometimes I'm envious of my cat. She wants something she cries and gets it. Then takes a nap. I walk her, pet her, play with her and make sure all her needs are taken care of. But I never ask for my needs. How easy just to say to my partner "you know what, I really don't want to cook tonight, let's get sushi and swim in the pool" and not justify it with all the various reasons I DESERVE to do this. I was on the edge recently and realized so what if I'm not super woman. I would rather be happy and emotionally healthy. Your posts hit me so hard because of how on the edge I was feeling emotionally and feeling defeated in this thing called life.

The aftermath/feelings after chemo I think are very real. Even guilt that I'm still here and others (my inner voice says are more deserving) are not. Thanks again!
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Julie
Live in Orange County, CA

Diagnosed with DCIS Oct. 2012

Bilateral Dec. 19, 2012
IDC, ER/PR-, Her2+++, Grade 3
Stage IIIa
15.6 cm
4/14 nodes + macrometastases
First thing each morning, I try on my bathing suit. Then, nothing worse can happen the rest of the day.
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