[linn65]

Karen, I cannot imagine it is beyond my thinking with the little bit I went thru it is nothing compared to this. I really have never been a depressed person, but like anyone down days. However, through this depression came, and I feared it would never leave.
I have never had that type of fear before.

I read a blog I wrote today that I wrote in September, and I could see how far emotionally, mentally and physically I have came. I am pushing through and people or video's like Jessica's video, and kind words, funny things help me get through when it is a rough day/week. I am trying to keep my "self talk" in check because my old self would say. You aren't doing good enough and you can do better. Now, I am working on changing it too your doing well and keep it up you are a survivor!

Now, I will have Jessica forever in my head, and I won't tell myself I should feel ashamed and guilty at my behavior or challenges in life. Because it is a slippery slope when the thoughts that have always come to mind of not doing good enough or not having value which I have done it seems my entire life. I am working on changing my self talk! It is much easier to encourage, help or believe in others than it is my own self.

Well, that serves no purpose!!!! It is a good day and it is even Monday.