HER2 Support Group Forums - View Single Post - It started last week

Lien · 07-17-2013, 02:10 PM

It sounds really rough. On an intellectual level, it seems somewhat right, but on an emotional level it sucks big time! Ofcourse you feel left out and sad and frustrated. You had cancer, she has your ex & the house & the kids. But.... he will be her 3d husband and chances are that she will screw up this relationship as well. Hopefully your son will be old enough to distance himself from all that. If not, you will be there for him, and he will appreciate your unconditional love, and when he grows up, he will realize how unselfishly you behaved so he could be happy.

I married a man who had two sons from a previous marriage. His wife left him for another man, and took the kids. After 7 years they split up and now she is with a man who doesn't care for the boys. They are grown ups now, but they know who looked out for them and who loved them unconditionally. We are off for a two week holiday tomorrow and 3 of our 4 kids are coming with us. The 4th is staying at home, because he can't get away from work. Otherwise he and his girlfriend would probably be coming with us as well.

For years I told my husband: just wait, they will come back to you when they grow up. And they did. They have a wonderful relationship now. Kids know. Trust me. You will be ok and your son will see the truth.

Sending big hugs and a virtual shoulder to rest your head on for a bit.

Love

Jacqueline

07-17-2013, 02:10 PM	#2
Lien Senior Member Join Date: May 2006 Location: Haarlem, the Netherlands Posts: 835	Re: It started last week - still in a funk. :( It sounds really rough. On an intellectual level, it seems somewhat right, but on an emotional level it sucks big time! Ofcourse you feel left out and sad and frustrated. You had cancer, she has your ex & the house & the kids. But.... he will be her 3d husband and chances are that she will screw up this relationship as well. Hopefully your son will be old enough to distance himself from all that. If not, you will be there for him, and he will appreciate your unconditional love, and when he grows up, he will realize how unselfishly you behaved so he could be happy. I married a man who had two sons from a previous marriage. His wife left him for another man, and took the kids. After 7 years they split up and now she is with a man who doesn't care for the boys. They are grown ups now, but they know who looked out for them and who loved them unconditionally. We are off for a two week holiday tomorrow and 3 of our 4 kids are coming with us. The 4th is staying at home, because he can't get away from work. Otherwise he and his girlfriend would probably be coming with us as well. For years I told my husband: just wait, they will come back to you when they grow up. And they did. They have a wonderful relationship now. Kids know. Trust me. You will be ok and your son will see the truth. Sending big hugs and a virtual shoulder to rest your head on for a bit. Love Jacqueline __________________ Diagnosed age 44, January 2004, 0.7 cm IDC & DCIS. Stage 1, grade 3, ER/PR pos. HER2 pos. clear margins, no nodes. SNB. 35 rads. On Zoladex and Armidex since Dec. 2004. Stopped Zoladex/Arimidex sept 2009 Still taking mistletoe shots (CAM therapy) Doing fine.