[karen z]

I agree with Joni- way too much of everything (likely pills too) going on here.
Get through Christmas and try to then find (if you haven't already):
a clinical psychologist (hopefully someone who specializes in illness) to talk to or a cancer counselor through any type of cancer wellness center by you (you usually do not have to belong to a particular hospital in the US).
It sounds like you also need a VERY VERY good internist or psychiatrist who can give you the minimum meds needed for free floating anxiety and sleep issues (generally one pill can help with both). I agree that xanax works well and fast- but it is very much an "in and out" of your body drug. Another good drug for anxiety (which works well for sleep too and is longer lasting) is clonazepam. It is a very good slower acting drug that helps calm one during the day and helps with rest at night. It sounds like you got loaded with a lot of drugs that you might not need- which might be causing some problems. Please find someone to talk to right away. I think it will help a lot. If you don't like the first person you see........shop around (the same way you would with an oncologist). Let us know how these strategies work out.