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Old 05-30-2012, 07:20 AM   #21
NEDenise
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Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Philly Suburbs
Posts: 1,709
Re: Dating when Stage IV

Marie,
In the spirit of full disclosure...I haven't been on a first date in over 30 years.
That said...my advice is...go for it! You deserve fun as much, and maybe more than, any woman your age. You are lovely, charming, warm, and you have a terrific sense of humor! What man wouldn't want to spend time with you!?

As many of our friends have queried...why do you want to date?

If it's for fun and companionship...

...then, I think you should tell your new 'friend' about your cancer on the date after the one when you reveal your annual salary, and your weight...which is to say, on the first Tuesday after NEVER!! He's not going to pay your bills or take care of you physically, so it's none of his business!

If however, you stumble across a gentleman that you find you'd like to spend your life with...

...then he has a right to know what he's signing up for. He needs to know how vastly underpaid you are (aren't we all) and, how many extra pounds you're carrying (you can safely shave a few off - and still feel honest). If he's sticks around after those two tidbits...then, and only then, you might want to share your diagnosis.

That's just my opinion...I could be wrong.
Denise
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1/11-needle biopsy
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4/12/11-A/C x 4, then T/H x 4, H only,Q3 weeks
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10/7/11 mastectomy/DIEP recon
11/11 radiation x28
1/12/12 1st CANCER-VERSARY!
1/12 Low EF/Herceptin "Holiday" :(
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6/20/13 quarterly CT - chest, abdomen, pelvis - All Clear!
7/5/13 finally off steroids!!
7/7/13 joined the ranks of the CHEMO NINJAS I am now Tekuto Ki Ariku cancer assassin!
7/13/13 Symptoms return - back on steroids
7/26/13 Back on Avastin - try again!
8/26/13 Not ready to return to classroom yet :( But I CAN walk without holding onto things! :)
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“ Life is a grindstone, and whether it grinds you down or polishes you up is for you, and you alone, to decide. ” – Cavett Robert
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