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Need some inspiration
Hello everyone,
It has been some time since I last posted. I have visited from time to time but have been staying away, trying not to think about breast cancer. What a silly ninny, hey! How can one so immersed in bc treatment not think about it. I have two more chemo treatments to be finished chemo but was surprised to hear I had radiation to look forward to after chemo. I have to admit it does feel like I will be on this road forever. I have been able to remain in good spirits but am finding it is harder and harder with each passing day. I read here about women changing their lives, trying hard to beat this cancer but here I am feeling like I cannot move forward, legs as heavy as cement, my mind vacant. I suppose it is normal for our moods to go up and down but golly this is tough to manage. My husband seems to find it harder than me and has suffered much with anxiety. I on the other hand have been a brick throughout, now suddenly close to the end of chemo I am finding the facade is cracking and I am not a brick any longer. I would like to hear that I am feeling normal emotions and that the lows are a place to rebound from. Thanks, Carolyn
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12/17/08 biopsy after two 6 mos mammo recalls
12/30/08 diagnosed high grade IDC & DCIS ER/PR +, Her2 (+++) post menopausal/age 57
1/15/09 double mastectomy/skin sparing; no evidence of vascular/lymphatic invasion, 8neg/8 nodes (tumor 8.0mm)
2/16/09 given portacath/removed 4/30/10
2/18/09 "surprise" 2.0mm tumor/positive borders~completed 28 rads 10/09.
2/23/09 until 4/19/10~treatments every 3wks (4 Cytoxan + Adriamycin, 4 Taxol + Herceptin, 13 Herceptin alone)
8/09 osteoporosis diagnosis/Zometa 3 yrs of 1x/6 months
Chemo side effects; Deafness, kidney function loss
11/09 began Aromatase Inhibitor (Femara)/Feb2014, stopped Femara early/after 3 mos began Tamoxifen for 8 mos to complete 5 years
11/10 Reconstruction, directly to silicone implants
12/11 nipples by skin graft/Right breast size reduced
I have heard there are troubles of more than one kind
Some come from ahead and some come from behind.
But I've bought a big bat. I'm all ready you see.
Now my troubles are going to have trouble with me!
Dr. Seuss
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