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Chelee · 08-21-2007, 05:57 PM

I want to thank all of you for your condolences and heart felt words of support. I am deeply moved by all your kind words. My gratitude to all of you is inexpressible. I know its only been six days since my Mother passed away but the pain seems to get worse each day. Its the realization that I can never pick up that phone and talk to her again. Let alone I usually went to see her at least 3 or 4 times a wk. Tomorrow will be very difficult because it will be the 1st day since her passing that I have two doctors appts. One on Wed., and then Thrus. I would *always* swing by my Moms house after running an errand or going to a doctors appt. There was hardly a time I ran out without stopping by to see her.

My Dad died when I was only 5 yrs old. Died of a massive heart attack. Since Dad died my Mother has been everything to me. My Mom, sister and best friend. I was so blessed to have her in my life. I have lots of wonderful memories of her that no one can take away...but the thought that I can never talk to her again is so painful. There is so much I'm going to miss about her. I feel like such a big part of me is missing never to be the same. I'm glad she is without pain and no longer suffering...but oh how I wish I had her back again....even for just five minutes. She told me once if something happened to her to pull myself by my bootstraps and keep going. How I wish it were that easy. Again...thanks to all of you for your heartfelt condolences. I appreciate all your kind words...it means more to me then you could possible know at this difficult time. Thanks for all your kindness & words of comfort. I really needed it. I knew this is the one safe place I could express myself.

Chelee

08-21-2007, 05:57 PM	#5
Chelee Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Southern, CA Posts: 2,511	I want to thank all of you for your condolences and heart felt words of support. I am deeply moved by all your kind words. My gratitude to all of you is inexpressible. I know its only been six days since my Mother passed away but the pain seems to get worse each day. Its the realization that I can never pick up that phone and talk to her again. Let alone I usually went to see her at least 3 or 4 times a wk. Tomorrow will be very difficult because it will be the 1st day since her passing that I have two doctors appts. One on Wed., and then Thrus. I would always swing by my Moms house after running an errand or going to a doctors appt. There was hardly a time I ran out without stopping by to see her. My Dad died when I was only 5 yrs old. Died of a massive heart attack. Since Dad died my Mother has been everything to me. My Mom, sister and best friend. I was so blessed to have her in my life. I have lots of wonderful memories of her that no one can take away...but the thought that I can never talk to her again is so painful. There is so much I'm going to miss about her. I feel like such a big part of me is missing never to be the same. I'm glad she is without pain and no longer suffering...but oh how I wish I had her back again....even for just five minutes. She told me once if something happened to her to pull myself by my bootstraps and keep going. How I wish it were that easy. Again...thanks to all of you for your heartfelt condolences. I appreciate all your kind words...it means more to me then you could possible know at this difficult time. Thanks for all your kindness & words of comfort. I really needed it. I knew this is the one safe place I could express myself. Chelee __________________ DX: 12-20-05 - Stage IIIA, Her2/Neu, 3+++,Er & Pr weakly positive, 5 of 16 pos nodes. Rt. MRM on 1-3-06 -- No Rads due to compromised lungs. Chemo started 2-7-06 -- TCH - - Finished 6-12-06 Finished yr of wkly herceptin 3-19-07 3-15-07 Lt side prophylactic simple mastectomy. -- Ooph 4-05-07 9-21-09 PET/CT "Recurrence" to Rt. axllia, Rt. femur, ilium. Possible Sacrum & liver? Now stage IV. 9-28-09 Loading dose of Herceptin & started Zometa 9-29-09 Power Port Placement 10-24-09 Mass 6.4 x 4.7 cm on Rt. femur head. 11-19-09 RT. Femur surgery - Rod placed 12-7-09 Navelbine added to Herceptin/Zometa. 3-23-10 Ten days of rads to RT femur. Completed. 4-05-10 Quit Navelbine--Herceptin/Zometa alone. 5-4-10 Appt. with Dr. Slamon to see what is next? Waiting on FISH results from femur biopsy. Results to FISH was unsuccessful--this happens less then 2% of the time. 7-7-10 Recurrence to RT axilla again. Back to UCLA for options.