[Ruth]

Hi everyone! Good topic!

Let's see...I am one of those implant girls. My feelings at the beginning (during treatment etc) was to just make it through. I couldn't focus on the thought of new boob right away so I waited until almost 2 years before deciding to try an implant. The big deciding factor happened when I was in Florida on a girls trip and I almost lost my removable friend when I flipped over on my raft! No kidding. I got out of the water and pretty much decided right then and there that I didn't want to worry about that darn thing anymore!

When I was diagnosed, I was nursing so they gave me some kind of dry up super fast drug and my remaining breast shrunk to sooooo small. I was a nice B cup before it all happened. I went in for a prostesis fitting and I will never forget the lady saying I needed size ZERO....I didn't even think they made a zero! Even with my zero sized prostesis I needed a little padding on my remaining breast. To me, I never looked right in or out of clothes. I was always aware that I didn't have a breast. I would shower and not look down and lived my life with the conscious thought that it was missing. Now I don't even give it a second thought or that my new breast is not "real" because it is real to me!

I started the journey of expanding and exchanging..all in all 3 surgeries. Am I happy with it? Absolutely. Was it painful? Yes, the expanding part was a pain in the rear. Do I have pain now? None at all. Does it look normal? No, BUT it is pretty. It is a prettier breast than I had after nursing 3 kids. I don't have much feeling on it and it is not big. I am a B again. The nipple reconstruction was the most amazing surgery to me. He took part of my remaining nipple and made a new one. Also took skin at my bikini line and make the areola. I don't need tatoo's since the color is naturally darker. That was pretty cool. Plastic surgeons are artists in many ways.

It is such a personal decision! I was given every opinion in the book on what to do and you know what? None of those mattered...what mattered most is what I wanted and needed. I truly believe that we know ourselves the best for us and we know what we need and don't need. I personally think that when we are in treatment our brains are a little fuzzy and this is a big decision to make. Some of the reconstruction surgeries are quite extensive and the healing time very long. I remember I just wanted my eyelashes back mostly...I thought about that more than a breast during treatment.

Some of the "life plans" I had in treatment are SO not happening now....like giving up chocolate and cheese. I mean come on?! Was I crazy? I could not survive without a taste of hersheys or a slice of pizza! I must admit though that I do eat a more balanced diet and eat my veggie's and fruits.

I hope that everyone finds happiness in their own decisions and doesn't regret what they have decided. I wanted to give a view of someone who had reconstruction and is very happy with it.

Peace & love everyone ~ Ruth