[MJo]

Last week sure was challenging. Fortunately I was able to talk honestly with my boss. I'm not going anywhere for now, but she will help me find a job if I feel I can't work within the direction my organization is going.

I am concerned because last week I lost my sense of perspective and panicked. WHile I was being treated for cancer, I learned some valuable lessons. The importance of each day. Keeping things in perspective. My health and well being came first, etc. As a survivor, I am going back to my old habits and I don't like it. In my support group is a woman who just endured a Whipple operation for pancreatic cancer and 6 weeks of chemo/radiation. She finished last week and is talking about going back to work becuase she's afraid her company will eliminate her job if she stays out too long. I have a relative with glioblastoma brain cancer (that's another story). He is starting radiation and chemo, but is talking about going back to work as soon as possible. I don't know why some of us panic about work. As a single person, I do worry about not being able to take care of myself. The lady with pancreatic cancer is also single and she has voiced her worry about being poor and helpless. Perhaps we don't have a sense of a safety net in this country. We figure if we don't work we don't eat. But I know that life is more than that and I am more than that.