[Believe51]

Oh Girls, how you can help me to see the other side of things. I think that digesting the news yesterday was too much. I strive each day to think & worry about the 'what is' and you girls caught me thinking of the 'what if's'; I thank you for that, for catching me before I fall--Ooops! LOL. I am so thankful to have found such a blessed group of friends here @ HER2support. It is funny to have so much knowledge about something(Brain Mets)and as soon as you hear the news you FREEZE!!!

We found 3 spots that were about 1 cm large and full Brain Radiation was suggested for him. His tumor markers are up but not alarmingly as before. Our hope is to go on Tykerb(w/Xeloda + replace Tamoxifen)) and break that brain/blood barrier. Although we are nervous about Dana Farber we look forward to it with great relief. We have all our ammo to fight with and you can all consider us "Armed & Dangerous"....BRING IT!!! He has been fitted for the form they will use for radiation and if he needs it after DFCI we can start radiation that day. The day after DFCI is with 2 seperate Oncologists: his original doctor + the second opinion doctor. Part of him feels the lag with getting on to a new treatment was too long and I hope he does not feel betrayed from the doctors actions. I too feel there was too much time in between but I am not a doctor I just play one in real life.

I feel empowered from your posts, your wisdom is priceless. Your gift of friendship is more than I ever imagined and I say thanks each morning and evening. As some of you may already know candles are one of my greatest vices. Two Yankee or two Henri Bendel candles burn in my home daily: One for my Love, the second for friends & family. Not a day goes by that I do not say a prayer when lighting them. Today I will light them again giving thanks to these special bonds we have with you Angels. Thank you for your replies and keep 'em coming if anyone thinks of anything else for your wisdom is part of that "AMMO". I take your questions & comments to all doctor's appointments and such.

When we sit quietly together tonight most certainly by the ocean, my thoughts will be consumed by your comments, your strength and knowledge. Thank you all for loving and supporting us because we could not do this without you. As the waves crash the shore with awesome fierceness it will remind me of the courageous strength you all have. When the sun sets it shall be one more day we have fought, one more day we have won. And most certainly when I smell the fresh ocean air I shall give thanks to being alive here with my Knight in Shining Armor and the wonderful people here I am proud to call my Angels.

We thank you again for being you. Sometimes at night I think about someone in particular, I will think explicitly of them. I review their journey in my mind, the words of their wisdom, their quests. I remember a certain funny post or the baby born in their family. I pray for the families of friends that they have lost. Yes My Loves, each and every single day is comprised of daily tributes and today is no different!!

I leave you again for now saying: BRING IT!!!!.....and that I do and always will still BELIEVE!!!...>Waiting For A Miracle>Believe51..(Marie G)