[KellyA]

Hi Maria,


I am also er-, and do understand how you feel. I am already feeling like I am at a huge disadvantage being Her2+ (other than the woman on this wonderful site, I am the only person I know out of the many who I know have bc), and being er- just scares me even more. How many nights I have wished that I could take the AI's and other meds.... It's depressing and sometimes I feel so helpless. I read constantly how her2+ has a "poorer prognosis" and then read how er- also has one. Sometimes I feel like the news just gets worse and worse. What I try to do, is remind myself how Herceptin has changed the prognosis for the her2 part, and even though there is nothing for us er- gals, that I am very lucky to have one target drug, rather then nothing.

One thing that I did recently that helped me enormously, was to sit down with a pen and paper and I pulled up the thread on date, prognosis, etc. and wrote down every person that was her2, er-, lymph node+ and was dx'd at the same stage or higher than myself. I wrote down the dx date and other necessary info. I was surprised that by the time I finished, I had FOUR pages of women that were doing wonderfully, with no relapses. That little exercise really gave me hope.

You know everyone is in thier own situation here- I am sure that many of us wish different aspects of each others dx's. er-'s want to be er+'s, her2+'s want to be her2-'s, stage IV's want to be stage II's, triple neg's wish to be her2+. But the fact is, that regardless of what the little pieces are, we all together make up the big puzzle, and we each need one another to see the big picture. I am so so grateful for this site, because without it, I would NEVER have the outlook that I do now. It has truely been a blessing. Try looking at that thread- I think you'll be as surprised as I was, at how many of us are doing wonderfully, regardless of hormone status, stage, etc.

Love, Kelly