[MJo]

Steph. This was my 4th muga. I have had them every three months. I am glad that after 5 years on Herc your heart continues strong and that your score is now 66. I hope I never need Herceptin again, but I would like to think I could take it again if needed.

Heart. I don't know the technical stuff, but the MUGA measures the pumping strength of your heart. It's done in the nuclear medicine department of my hospital. THey inject me with something radioactive and then watch my heart pumping on a screen. Apparently Herceptin can damage the heart's pumping ability, but hopefully it's not permanent and I will heal. Genentech says that only 4-5% of patients have this happen, but I think the rate will prove to be higher. Maybe they can someday make a version of Herceptin that doesn't carry the heart risk.

In hindsight, Ive been coughing too much. But since I have asthma, I never know if respiratory problems are caused by asthma or something else. I am disappointed. I wish my body were stronger. My oncologist is too blunt sometimes, and a few weeks ago he was talking to me about losing some of the weight I've gained so I don't put stress on my heart. He asked me how long my parents have lived -- both into their 80s. He said "maybe you didn't inherit the longevity gene." So now I wonder if this is a sign that I'm a weakling. This too shall pass.