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Marejo,
I just read your posts today and wanted to offer my support and encouragement as well. I remember so well feeling the exact same way as you do when my Herceptin treatment ended. I was diagnosed in July 2001, at 36, Stage III, with large tumor and many lymph nodes involved. The prognosis wasn't good, but I was lucky enough to get Herceptin in a clinical trial and it really worked for me. I've just celebrated my 5-year anniversary as a survivor, and it does get easier! The hardest time for me, after the initial shock, was when treatment was over and then the onc. just shows you the door and says "I'll see you in 3 months"--you're just waiting anxiously to see what happens. I had such a hard time making any kind of plans, couldn't even think about the future, etc. But, I talked with a clinical social worker about these concerns and they are completely normal...I also started taking Paxil for anxiety, which helped me. Slowly, as more and more time passed, cancer became less of an all-consuming fear for me and I am doing great now--not the same as before cancer, of course, don't think any of us can ever go back to feeling carefree and invincible, but life is much richer now, too. Anyway, just wanted to say, hang in there, stay strong and keep the faith! Sending you a hug and my best wishes for many years NED.
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