getting emotional
 

Hi folks,
O.k. I'm putting out my request for some positive vibes, now. My story: I finished my neoadjuvant TCH chemo in Dec. and am still on Herceptin. I am expecting to have a quadrantectomy next week and radiation next month. I had a breast MRI Monday and I meet with my surgeon tomorrow to get results and find out when my surgery will be, and what or how much surgery we'll need...hence the anxiety!
Adding to the stress is this persistant cough I've had off and on for about a month, which I'll ask my surgeon about tomorrow and see if I can have a chest xray or what?
Until now I've been very confident, positive, and strong. My ultrasounds I've had during chemo showed the tumor shrinking almost completely away, so that's very encouraging, but I feel like I'm at a very delicate turning point right now. I'm so happy to be off chemo, but it's a scary thing, too. I don't want those cancer cells to wake back up and start all over again.
I'm nervous and moody and uptight. I've been eating chocolate chip cookies all week and avoiding talking to people because I don't want to snap at them because they don't understand my touchy feelings...which is why I'm here talking to you.
Thank you. Love, Celeste

Hi Celeste,

The anxiety of not knowing is the worst - just think, tomorrow you will know your plan, and then you will feel better. I am sending you all the positive vibes I can.

Oh, and chocolate chip cookies are good for nerves, didn't you know:)?

Keep us posted.

all the best
caya

Hi Celeste, The anxiety we have all experienced when waiting for the "results" of xrays, scans, etc. can really get one down, way down. I'm glad you posted and let us know what you are going through, it's therapeutic and gives us the chance to be here for you and hopefully give you the support you need right now. We've all been there...and we'll be rooting for you tomorrow! Please let us know what you find out, take some deep breaths, go out and look at the stars, and eat all the cookies you want. Sending you love and prayers, sister. Hugs, Vickie

peaceful thoughts to you!

"where we go one, we go all". Ok, so I stole that one, but it's a good one to steal, right? Celeste, we are with you, sweetheart. We understand what you're going through. You are in our thoughts and prayers. You have inspired me to "light a fire" in the "keeping your mind off of BC" room. Please join us and toss a log into the fire and burn your fears away.

getting emotional
 

It is perfectly normal to be feeling what you are feeling right now. Fear of the unknown (in your case test results) is normal. After you get the results you will be able to sit down and make a plan that is right for you.
In the meantime, enjoy those cookies !! I am sending positive vibes your way.

I hacked for about a year after my chemotherapy and radiation. Had shortness of breath also, Oncologist said it was probably from radiation but I have to believe the chemo didn't help. I didn't have any symptoms at all of my lung mets and was working out and exercising like a bandit, so coughing does not necessarily mean that it has spread to your lungs, but I do know the fear you have, so it's best to have it checked out for your peace of mind..sherryg683

Celeste,

I am sending many positive vibes your way. I hope you have peace today.

Amelia

Thanks!
 

Thank you so much. I've got a smile on my face and I'm on my way to my wonderful surgeon's office...with cookie in hand!!
More later, love Celeste

Go Get 'em Girl!!

Wrote that with me fighting color!!>>Believe51

Results
 

I'm so grateful for the support, everybody! I saw the surgeon, saw the mri pics, we made a decision. Turns out I will have a radical mastectomy in two weeks (1/21). The chemo irradicated an enormous amount of the tumor, but since the two remaining tiny spots are rather far apart, and it was such an aggressive variety (micropapillary, HER2 +++, lymph node involvement, and very, very large at the start), it's safer to take the whole breast, including the lymph nodes, rather than lumpectomy and risk not getting it all.
So I guess today is the day I start saying goodbye to my lovely 31 year old cleavage! As much as it hurts, I'm glad the chemo was so effective, and I have a really good surgeon, and I'm going to live another 70 years! Depending on what we find in the lymph nodes, I might not need radiation or hormone therapy...that would be really great.
I'll check in with you all again this evening.
So much love and hugs to you all, Celeste
I'm going to the pool for a swim. Gotta work off all those cookies.

Hi Celeste...

I'm glad a plan is in place and you are ready to go. You go girl.......

Asking God to send you His peace and I am thanking Him that things are going well for you.

Mary Jo

http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/28/28_3_6v.gif Celeste, sending you special love from my heart to yours. See you at the fire!>>Believe51



http://www.smileycentral.com/sig.jsp?pc=ZSzeb095&pp=

update
 

Thanks Believe51! That looks just like me! All is going well. Everyone's support has been priceless. I'm feeling confident in my decisions, and ready to take on this new phase of my life. I will be doing radiation, also. I met my radiation oncologist and she's fantastic. A great one to add to my already top notch team.
See you at the fire!

Dear Celeste -
Hope you are warmed up a little by now with that roaring campfire!

Remind us when the 21st is coming around so we can all send you prayers and positive wishes for a great outcome with your surgery.

You are one of the young survivors here, but you see there are some of is older gals who are still kicking and we will see you in our chorus line! Get 'em up girls (guys,too)!

My friend Barbara in my support group had a diagnosis very similar to yours. She is four years NED. Herceptin is a wonderful thing. I coughed my way through treatment. Still coughing!

dancing girls
 

Thank you Mjo. My cough has improved with the addition of a humidifier and and air purifier in my house. Looking forward to being NED, too very, very soon.

I've got my high heeled boots ready for the chorus line. Can we do the can can (one of my favorites)? I do feel like the baby of the group. Kind of nice, actually, since I tend to feel a bit old around others my age, these days.

Anyway, it does feel better to know my plan now. This experience has taught me how to ask for help. I never needed it so much before. Turns out, it's not so hard. The response has been overwhelming. There truly is safety in numbers.