HER2 Support Group Forums

HER2 Support Group Forums (https://her2support.org/vbulletin/index.php)
-   her2group (https://her2support.org/vbulletin/forumdisplay.php?f=28)
-   -   5 years later, In honor of my mother.. (https://her2support.org/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=68935)

Redwolf8812 10-01-2020 07:58 PM

5 years later, In honor of my mother..
 
Hi all! My name is Anna and I just logged into my late mother's account. She left passwords and everything for us before she passed and I just now found them and decided to see what she has said. I was hesitant because I knew it would hurt but I was also disappointed in my self for not have doing this right after she passed to talk to everyone. My mother died on June 9th, 2015 and if any of you knew my mother Penny, she was truly a great person(my bestest friend) and I would do anything to be with her even just for another moment. Reading her old posts and the many who helped comfort her during the hardest of times has been bitter sweet. It has been over 5 years since she logged into this account and I am amazed it was so smooth. Words cannot describe how grateful I am for this to still hold her many memories that I can now look back on. It is extremely hard seeing her old updates and seeing all of the stuff she knew about going on within her and how much time she had left. She was so incredibly strong and I have absolutely no clue how she did it all. I was 6 years old when she was diagnosed and 11 when she passed away, so I was not aware of much that went on with her, I usually just got informed if it had been a bad or good week and would spend every second with her coloring in bed or watching movies. I was truly spoiled by her and slept by her side until I could no longer. This information being here has helped me see the sides I was too young to see back then. I think a lot about how if only it had been 5 years later on, maybe she would have better chances, and why her. But I have to stop, she was very strong on faith and that God had a plan for everyone. I know she is no longer suffering and just look forward to the day we can meet again. I have no clue if anyone will even see this but I wish everyone well and hope you all can overcome all struggles that face you, and I thank those that if any see this, were there for my mom.

donocco 10-02-2020 12:28 AM

Re: 5 years later, In honor of my mother..
 
Anna

Im sorry about your Mom. My God you are only about sixteen now but sound very mature. Im glad you get comfort looking at her posts. Im curious myself to see them and will search for them tomorrow. Thank you for coming on board. God bless


Paul

tricia keegan 10-02-2020 06:09 AM

Re: 5 years later, In honor of my mother..
 
Hi Anna- I too remember your Mom posting and I know it's bittersweet for you to read her posts now but I'm glad you can find comfort in them. I really am so sorry you lost your Mom at such a young age but I think she'd be very proud of the young woman you've become. Best wishes to you.

tricia keegan 10-02-2020 06:13 AM

Re: 5 years later, In honor of my mother..
 
Hi Anna- I remember your Mom and feel so sorry you lost her at such a young age. I'm also glad you can find some comfort in reading her posts here although can well understand it's bittersweet to do so. My best wishes to you going forward and I feel sure your Mom would be very proud of the young woman you've become.

tricia keegan 10-02-2020 06:20 AM

Re: 5 years later, In honor of my mother..
 
Hi Anna- I remember your Mom posting here and I'm so sorry you lost her at such a young age. I'm glad too that you can find some comfort in reading her posts although can well understand it would be a bittersweet experience. My best wishes to you going forward and I feel sure your Mom would be proud of the young woman you've become today.

donocco 10-02-2020 12:40 PM

Re: 5 years later, In honor of my mother..
 
Anna

You should print out some of your moms posts to show your future children about their grandmother. Boards are funny things. Due to google politics they can disappear suddenly. Its not that likely here but why take a chance. Print them out now and be safe.
If you dont have a printer at home, go to a library.


Paul

margaret 10-02-2020 07:35 PM

Re: 5 years later, In honor of my mother..
 
So sorry for your loss Anna.
Thank you for sharing with us.
Hope you continue to find strength and comfort in your life.
Good luck in all your pursuits.

Lien 10-05-2020 12:17 PM

Re: 5 years later, In honor of my mother..
 
I'm sorry for your loss. You were so very young when she passed and yet you write about her like someone much older. It's as if she's tried to share herself with you at double the normal speed, so you could benefit from her love and wisdom long after she was gone.
I remember your mom well. I spent a lot of time on these boards in the 16 years after my diagnosis in 2004, so we "met" regularly. I agree that you should print out everything she has written. One day it might be gone from the internet.
My father passed two years ago and going through his stuff, I found the letters my parents wrote to friends and family during the time we lived in California (we're from the Netherlands, Europe). It's amazing to read their thoughts on things that I never discussed with them. Take good care of yourself.

donocco 10-06-2020 12:13 PM

Re: 5 years later, In honor of my mother..
 
Anna

These posts are important to you and, as Lien said, you may not be aware how transient these boards can be. I worked as a consultant pharmacist on an AOL breast cancer group in the late 1990s to 2008. The work I did on this board was more important to me than working at Rite Aids. In 2008 the Board was dissolved. There was one woman on the board whose screen name was Exblaze, She was a woman in her early 40s with metastatic breast cancer and two young children. Not seeing them grow up was her biggest concern. She died in June 2006 a few days before her daughter graduated high school.

She was an exceptional woman. To me she was almost saintly. Certainly with her condition and children she would be entitled to think mostly of herself. She didnt. She was very nurturing and protective of all the other affected women on the board. To the point of being self sacrificing

I didnt have a printer so I spent months writing down her posts over the years. I still have them in two notebooks. I told her older brother I would write a book about them but I never have and feel guilty about this. I just dont know what to write. Maybe someday I will.

I can understand having these posts so available to you may be painful right now. You could print them and give them to an aunt or uncle for safekeeping until you feel ready to possess them.

Paul

Laurel 10-16-2020 05:47 PM

Re: 5 years later, In honor of my mother..
 
Dearest Anna,

We see your words and want you to know we remember your mother. She was brave and fought this disease with great tenacity, courage and grace. Her amazingly strong faith in her Savior filled every post she wrote and shared with us. We were blessed to have "known" her and to have fought along by her side against a shared foe that never fights fair.

Your mother surely treasured every moment you spent by her side. The mere presence of a cherished love one brings comfort to us as we struggle. You may have been too young to understand all that was happening, but your love and companionship were a great blessing to your mother. Anna, you were a comfort to her just by staying close. What a wonderful daughter you were to your mother. How lucky she was to have had you! What a brave little girl you were!

Anna, you may be proud of your mother. She never gave up or surrendered. You want to ask, "why?" When I was diagnosed I never asked, "why me?" Instead I said, "why not you?' Every life has its heavens and its hells. It is how you learn to soar in the in the heavens and burn through the hells that characterizes a life. I believe your mom was a woman who soared and knew how to endure the heat of illness. May you be just like her and carry her love and memory with you always. God bless you, dear Anna, and thank you for visiting us.

StephN 10-26-2020 06:27 PM

Re: 5 years later, In honor of my mother..
 
Hello to Penny's daughter. How brave of you to find the strength to find your way to this web site and visit your mother as we knew her. She was a tower of strength as she posted her cancer life story here. You have a wonderful role model.


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 03:25 AM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Copyright HER2 Support Group 2007 - 2021