Physical, mental, spiritual health: What do you do?
 

I am wondering what everyone has done to try and "get through"- either before, during, or after (or way after) treatment? What has worked best to keep you physically, mentally, and spiritually healthy? What have you found that is indispensable to your physical, mental, or spiritual health?

Best,
Karen

During chemo, I made sure we had at least one "date" with friends each month - usually the week I was on herceptin only. This served several purposes. With friends like mine, you definitely have a lot of laughter which is good for body AND soul. It also reminded me that, although I was living under a death sentence, I was still ALIVE and still me.

Chrisy,
What a great idea. It is so rejuvenating to have a date with friends and get a chance to laugh and talk- and laugh and talk. And you are right, it is good for body AND soul. I actually had dinner with three women last night who I work with and who were were often with me at the hospital for chemo, surgery, port placement, etc. I can't tell you how much good it did me (and I know them) to "connect" for a four hour dinner at a fun (New Orleans style) place last night!
Best,
Karen

Karen,

Family and friends played a big role while I was going through treatment. I am very greatful for that. After that I went back to work as soon as I could so I could keep myself busy and trying to incorporate to a semi-normal life again. With that all set. I kept on reading books as much as I can, each book takes me to a different scenario in life and that helps my mind's health. I also try to get out of the house and either do my groceries or plan on a trip, even if it is a short one. When I feel very tired I try to enjoy my rest and wathch productive programs on tv. Even when now we have the burden of BC, I try to make my life as normal as it was before, obviously I do not always feel normal, but I try.

Paty

Paty,
It is interesting that you mention your reading. I have always done much reading of academic material for my job but, over the years, I did not do as much "reading for pleasure". I have found during the last couple of years that one of my biggest pastimes (once again) is reading for pleasure. And, you are right, each book takes you somewhere and opens your mind to the next possibility. And I think that people underestimate the value of short trips or vacations! It does so much good to get away for a couple of days. Sometimes that is all we need to sustain us for awhile.
I enjoyed your post! Thanks for sharing what helps.
Best,
Karen

The 2 things that helped me the most (beside family and friends) is YOGA and the book by Eckhart Tolle, A New Earth.

I read a lot also. I also try to walk every day. Because I was working full time during the recurrence, I did not have the luxury to occupy myself with the treatment - luckily I've already had some experience from the first round in 2003. Keep yourself busy is important.

And when I was down or tired, I always remember the sentence from one of Fr. Robert Ronald's speeches: "even if you can not move [your body], then just think of something interesting." When I was recovering from the brain surgery and going through physical therapy (my left side was paralyzed after the 23-hour brain surgery), I followed that advice and was amazed at his wisdom - a sense of humor is essential.

Basically I think it taught me to accept myself and my 'current condition' while looking forward to the next moment, next day. That's also what Carl Rogers said about interpersonal relationship - to focus on the 'here' and 'now'. I learned that concept from the group training when volunteering in the counseling center back in college.

For some reason, everything I did in the past seems to have prepared me for the battle against cancer. And everytime something unexpected happens, I just look up to the sky (or ceiling :)) and ask "now what?".

It is God's problem, not mine - when I have tried my best to maintain my health.

Harrie,
I have heard a lot about The New Earth but haven't yet read. It looks like that would be a good thing to do. What has it meant to you? And YOGA seems to be very helpful to people. How long before you saw its effects?
Karen

Jackie,
I love the line "even if you can not move [your body], then just think of something interesting." What great advice for all of us. I also like the thought that it is "God's problem" not ours if we have tried to maintain our health. That is why I think it is so important to talk about how we can do that. Keep walking! I have started up again and doing pretty well. Now I need to get into YOGA!
Karen

Jackie,

The minute I get down, I try to go outside. I walk as much as I can, but sometimes just look up at the sky and say "wow" there is a lot of life out here and I want to be part of it. Yoga is great, but stretching and breathing on a mat or towel in quiet room works too. Book yourself a couple of dinner outings or coffees or walks. Keep something on the calendar to look forward to, even if it is small. Pace yourself. Make your bedroom very inviting, so when you are pooped you can take yourself to a quiet spot, relax, breath, pray and go to sleep. Rest is very important. I have picked up some new ideas from the wise people on your post. Accepting where we are is important....the new normal as they say.

Friends forever,
Catherine

Stay busy
 

My therapy has been to stay busy.

Stripped some wallpaper I hated. Destroyed the walls. Learned how to wall compound, learning how to mitre corners of baseboard and next how to repair the sheet rock I destroyed when ripping off the baseboards.

This all started with just painting a few dark cabinets white. Two months later....

Benadryl and Ambion at night help, too.

Hang in there, there is light at the end of the tunnel.

Carla

Shadowpilot
 

Definitely stay busy and "plugged in" to things that aren't specifically cancer related, though it is almost impossible for cancer to not color almost everything in your life. I have learned some very effective meditation and relaxation techniques taught to me by my therapist who I have gone to for several years and continue with her monthly. It takes some wrestling and wrangling with the "radio" (as Steph calls it) that plays in your head - to keep the negative thoughts at bay and live as free from the fear as possible, especially for a mets girl. I did a lot of that wrestling a couple of years back and worked through my internal messaging. Our internal messages need to be monitored from time to time and reprogramed. It can take some deep inner mucking around and doesn't always feel good, but that's when I turn to my (twice now) successful anti-depressants ~ they get me through the cleaning out and clearing and re-booting of internal messaging...

Catherine,
I think that going outside- walking, gardening, sitting and and reading is so important. And sometimes we need to push ourselves to get out there but it always helps.
karen

For me in just a few words........

prayer.....reading God's word (the Bible)........exercise.......love of family and friends. I needed that always...but especially while going through treatment and beyond. Growing closer to my Lord each and everyday is my priority each day now....as I realize more than ever....that this life is short and eternity is what's waiting for forever....I want to be their.

Sending love and prayers to you my sisters,

Mary Jo
"For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son that whosoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life." John 3:16http://her2support.org/vbulletin/images/icons/icon7.gif

Boy Carla,
You have inspired me to tear up my house a bit!
Karen

WomanofSteel,
I like your mantra, especially the part about letting go of the pointless drama and surrounding yourself with people who make you happy. That was one of the first things a cancer counselor told me.
Karen

Physical, mental, spiritual health: What do you do?
 

Keep connections with friends and family open. Try to keep my life and daily activities as normal as possible. Watch alot of good comedy on T. V. Take myself out to coffee or a snack once in a while . Pray. Find a passion or two and get involved.

Very good advice, ElaineM.
Finding a passion or two or getting involved is important. Also, getting back to a passion left behind in the business of life (photography, drawing) helps a great deal I think.
Karen

On the mental side: I always go back to school after a major surgery - three times so far - partially because I always lose the job I had a year after the medical procedure. Because of my previous brain surgeries, my cognitive function declines fast whenever I am not in a structured setting.

These trainings also help me to get new jobs. A couple of my employers hired me knowing about my brain surgery, yet was convinced I could do the job because I scored high on the tests. (And then I'd disappoint them by having another surgery...:(

So, yes, we need to keep busy. Our brain is dead set in the "use it or lose it" condition.

I am a big tennis fanatic and I tried to play tennis as much as I could during treatment, it was a good way to exercise and hang out with my friends. We play and then go eat. I couldn't do it as much as I would have liked. I am now back to playing about 5 times a week and I feel like things are going back to normal. Spritually, I pray and find myself just talking to God during the day. I like to read about near death experience and life after death, just to reassure myself that it doesn't end here...at least I hope it doesn't. I also find peace in just going outside, laying on my hammock and looking up at the sky, especially at night. It brings me peace and reminds me that there's so much more out there than we know. ..sherryg683

Sherry,

Your response so was beautiful. It is amazing how our perception of things change once we have BC.

Amelia

Sherry,
Tennis sounds like it is just great for you. I am glad that prayer and being outside (the hammock sounds great) help with peace. You have a good plan.

Jackie,
Very brave of you to go back to school after surgeries! And you are right about "use it or lose it"- how true. So many of us have tried to stay busy and get back to our lives but have also tried to make sure we have balance in our lives now.
Karen

Sherry, I like to do that also. Although I have only done it a few times, I loved going outside at night, lying on my back on the picnic table and feeling the vastness of the dark sky with all the stars. It really gives me good feelings to feel the power of the universe that way.

Harrie,
A picnic table under the stars!! What a great idea.
kz

Going outside and enjoying the flowers, trees and everything alive, makes me feel relaxed and alive, calmer and what I was meant to be, at one with the earth/God. Beyond that I enjoy a little hot antioxidant tea, prayer, scripture reading, and cuddling with my little son.

The other night at about 2 in the morning I was wondering around like I sometimes do. I walked outside and saw the most amazing sight. The moon had this HUGE halo of light around it. It was perfectly round, all around the moon. I was so captivated, I just layed on the ground and watched it for about 15 minutes. The halo kept getting bigger but stayed in perfect round dimensions. It got so big that it look like it was coming down to engulf me or something. I had what felt like a spiritual moment there. I ran in to wake my husband up and tell him of this heavenly thing I saw and he told me..."that's just ice crystals around the moon, that's what makes this effect".. Bummer there. I still say it was heavenly..:) sherryg683

Sherry,

You've got a knowlegeable hubby with a typical male rational brain. Ask him who he thinks had put the ice crystals around the moon...at exact the time when you walked outside... It is definitely 'Heavenly'. (There's a reason why there are both males and females on this Earth...:)

By the way, did it rain the next day? An old Chinese saying states: "Whenever there's halo around the moon, it will rain afterwards."

Sherry,
I agree with Jackie- I think it was heavenly!!
k

We often have a good view of the rising moon from our house. Some times it DOES seem just huge! I think it is good for us to have occasion to feel the power of the universe and open ourselves to that.

Anyone see this "Eye of God" nebula? It really looks like a giant eye in space.

http://news.aol.com/article/space-photo-gallery/327819

I have done different things during the different stages. During chemo I made sure I ate right. It was like a religion - much more then even though I eat right now. Religiously meant - no sugar, sweets, white food, junk food. I also would not stuff myself. I totally gave up soda, cheese (for the most part) and watched. I even ate my fruit with my meal in order to control my blood glucose. Now, I will eat fruit as a snack and will eat my peanut M&Ms.

Also, I would do my bc research and found this board and it helped me to share my knowledge.

After rads, I found walking and running to be the core of coping. I love being outdoors - exercising, gardening etc.

trying to maintain good health has grounded me and trying to help others uplifts me.

Becky,

How did you know that? :)

Students in Taiwan (possibly in mainland China also) study the 12 principles (virtues) summarized by Dr. Sun Yet-sen, the founding 'Father' of modern China.

Piety, grace, trust (just), honesty, peace, serving others, diligence, perseverance, ...are all included. And the tenth one states: "Happiness is rooted from helping others." He had received his medical training in Honolulu (and was a practicing physician all his life.) The concept must be a universal one.

Young students (4th graders?) often use that quote whenever they are complimented on their good deeds. The culture - Confusius' teaching - is to be quiet about one's good deeds - very much like what's being taught in the Bible. The common response is "Don't mention it". But because kids are required to study the 12 principles, they often use the quote to brush off the 'thank you' to avoid feeling embarrassed.

I tried to maintain some semblance of normality. We spent time with our grandchildren and nieces and nephews. We continued with our gardening and I worked as much as I could for as long as I could. I also tried to make sure that I listened to my body and rested when I needed to. I am still having to learn, sometimes over and over again, that there is a new normal now. (Thank you, Andi.) Still, I think gardening, flowers, veggies, herbs, helped keep me centered through this. I planted things even when I wasn't sure I would be there to see them flourish. Gardening is a wonderful reminder of the bounty of this world. I sit here right now with my freezer full of veggies and meat and feel really blessed. I already have some of my seeds started for this spring. It is also a reminder to me that life is what you make of it.

StephN,
You are right- we must open ourselves to feeling the power of the universe and all that is connected. Thanks for posting the link.
kz

Thanks Becky,
Your message that "trying to maintain good health has grounded me and trying to help others uplifts me" is inspiring.
Best,
KZ

Jackie07,
Very interesting!!
karen

Fauxgypsy,
Thanks for your post. Now can you tell us what we should be planting and when?? I need gardening help.
kz