HER2 Support Group Forums

HER2 Support Group Forums (https://her2support.org/vbulletin/index.php)
-   her2group (https://her2support.org/vbulletin/forumdisplay.php?f=28)
-   -   Having a difficult time... (https://her2support.org/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=29620)

Chelee 08-16-2007 05:10 PM

Having a difficult time...
 
As some of you *might* know...my Mother was DX not to long after my bc DX with advanced lung cancer. Stage IV. She was a trooper and had several different drugs used to fight her cancer. I was so proud of her on how hard she fought this. She was 77 years old and she amazed me. But we just had to place her in hospice two days ago...she wasn't doing well. I went down there late last night and spent time with her. I'm so thankful I did because I just got a call today that my Mother has passed away.

The un-believable grief I feel right now is unbearable. My Mother was everything to me...we were so close. Not just my Mother but my best friend. I can't imagine life without her. Did I mentioned how much I hate this darned disease! How I pray for a cure. I'm having a hard time typing through the tears. Just sharing with people I feel safe with.

Feeling lost & so alone.

Chelee

Julie2 08-16-2007 05:16 PM

Sorry for the new Cheele. I know how difficult it would be to loose the mother.

Julie

chrisy 08-16-2007 05:24 PM

Dear Chelee,
I am so sorry to hear of your mom's passing. It is so difficult to lose a parent. I lost my mom over 10 years ago and it still hurts. It's such a blessing, tho, that you were able to spend time with her. I guess I know now where you get your fighting spirit! She must have been very proud of you.

I know this is a very sad time for you and I hope you can feel my prayers and love wrapping around you right now. And especially, know that you have your special angel watching over you now.

Much, much love
chris

hutchibk 08-16-2007 05:46 PM

May the lord hold you and comfort you, Chelee. Just know that he now cares for your mother and she has no more disease or pain. My deepest sympathies for your loss.

RhondaH 08-16-2007 05:47 PM

Chelee...
 
my thoughts and prayers are with you. BIGGGG huggs to you.

Rhonda

Christine 08-16-2007 05:55 PM

My Mom passed away from metastatic bc in October 1989, eight months later I was diagnosed with breast cancer.

Mom and I were more like sisters. My dad had died from a heart attack when I was 14 and we both used each other for support through the hard times. She saw me through college and graduate school.

In all likelyhood my Mom was also HER2 positive, but back in 1989 there was nothing available.

Hugs
Christine

mslinda 08-16-2007 06:02 PM

I am so sorry to hear the news about your Mom. My heart goes out to you. I will be praying that God gives you peace and strength.

Love and Hugs,
Linda
S. Mississippi

Barbara H. 08-16-2007 06:47 PM

Dear Chelee,
I am so sorry to hear about the passing of your mom. You have been through so much with the difficulties of receiving adequate medical care. I didn't realize that your mother was so ill.
Thinking of you,
Barbara H.

Mary Anne in TX 08-16-2007 06:50 PM

Oh Chelee, I'm so sorry that you have lost your mom. She's in God's hands now, breathing well and safe. But nothing hurts like losing your mom. Just know that we all care and send comfort and love to you at such a difficult time. ma

BonnieR 08-16-2007 06:59 PM

I know you feel lost but you are never alone.......

eric 08-16-2007 07:04 PM

Chelee,

My thoughts are with you. My wife Caryn is also fighting stage 4 bc while her mom is battling stage 4 lung cancer. Your not alone and their are so many wonderful people here that will do whatever we can to help you through this.

Eric

Becky 08-16-2007 07:13 PM

Dear Chelee

I am so sorry about the loss of your dear mother. My thoughts are with you and my arms are around you.

Love to you

Margerie 08-16-2007 07:31 PM

Chelee,

So sorry to hear about losing your mom. She was blessed in life, having such a special relationship with her daughter. She will be with you in your heart.

Grace 08-16-2007 07:36 PM

Chelee,

So very sorry about your mother. Your biggest comfort will be knowing you did everything you could for her. My thoughts are with you.

Faith in Him 08-16-2007 07:48 PM

So sorry for your loss. She is safe now.

God Bless

Yorkiegirl 08-16-2007 07:57 PM

Chelee my thoughts and prayers go out to you on the loss of your Mom.
I know how difficult this is. I lost my Mom 14 yrs ago,to cancer as well. She was only 58 years old.
Just know that she is no longer in pain and she will always be looking after you.

Sending you lot's of cyber (((((((((HUG'S)))))))))

Emelie 08-16-2007 08:01 PM

Please know that she will always be with you in all that you do. She can rest now, as so should you.
Take care of yourself and grieve until you are done.
Peace be with you,
Emelie

SusanC 08-16-2007 08:33 PM

How blessed you and your Mom were to have such a special relationship. She will live on in your heart. I too, lost my Mom to lung cancer 13 years ago. Hopefully your memories will comfort you and ease your pain.
Susan C.

lexigirl 08-16-2007 08:35 PM

Dear Chelee,

Please accept my deepest sympathy. I am sorry that your mom has passed away. Please know that I am thinking of you.

Hugs and Prayers,
Lexi

Vanessa 08-16-2007 08:36 PM

I am so sorry about the loss of your mother. She was fortunate to have a daughter like you, as you were fortunate to have a mother like her. Although you will always grieve for her, time will lessen the pain. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Jean 08-16-2007 08:37 PM

Dear Chelee,
I am so very sorry to read your post. I understand your loss, my mother
passed 7 yrs ago and my heart still aches. I miss her so very much. She
is with me in spirit and forever remains in my heart.

Please know I am here for you and I send you prayers and hugs.

Jean

Leslie's sister 08-16-2007 08:40 PM

I'm Sorry
 
These wonderful ladies have sad it all. Just know that I am sorry as well Chelee. May our wonderful God, lift you up into His comforting arms and carry you in this time of grief.

tousled1 08-17-2007 05:10 AM

Chelee,

My deepest sympathy to you in your mother's passing. I know how difficult it is to lose a parent but remember she is no longer in pain and suffering. She is now at peace and is looking over you. You will always have her memory and be thankful that you got to say goodbye. Remember all the good times you shared together. Sending you a big cyber hug!

charlotte 08-17-2007 06:28 AM

you are not alone
 
chelee: you are not alone or lost we are here for you.... I feel your grief through your posting... I pray you will find peace and comfort...hugs and prayers being sent to you... charlotte

charlotte 08-17-2007 06:32 AM

chelee: you are not alone... we are here for you....sending you a cyber hug....charlotte

mke 08-17-2007 07:50 AM

I am so sorry. Especially as this comes on top of all else you have endured.

Vi Schorpp 08-17-2007 07:51 AM

So Sorry
 
for the loss of your mother. I have not lost my mother yet, but I did lose my husband last year. My daughter's birthday was Wednesday (she turned 28) and she was just out of sorts. I knew she was missing her dad as we were talking about previous birthdays. That night, she had a dream about him. I won't go into all the details, but to sum it up, she ran to the hospital to visit him and he was lying on the floor in the room's bathroom. She rubbed his arm and his eyes opened and he said, "Erika, I'm so happy to see you." He then bounded into bed and she crawled up next to him to snuggle. She was upset that once she woke up he was gone, but I think it was birthday message just for her.

Gerri 08-17-2007 08:01 AM

Dear Chelee,

I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your mother. The fact that you went to see her the night before her passing must give you such comfort. You have such wonderful memories to sustain you in your grief. Losing a parent is so hard, I have lost both of mine - my mom to bc when I was 12 yrs old - so I can relate to your grief.

You are in my prayers.

Sheila 08-17-2007 08:27 AM

Chelee
I am so sorry to hear about your Mom....my Mom is a year older than yours, and she is also my spirit for this fight...you are in my thoughts and prayers that you will gain strength from your Mother's fighting spirit, to continue your own fight...she is now but a prayer away, watching over you. Sending you much healing love and a hug at this difficult time.

Believe51 08-17-2007 09:48 AM

My Dear Sweet Chelee
 
I as so sorry to hear about your Mother's passing, I am all choked up with tears and sorrow for you and the family. I know getting alone without someone we love, especially our parents must be the hardest thing one can go through. My parents are still married and here but my father has ailing health. I push away thoughts from time to time about what will I do without my husband?? I cannot phathom it!! I have lost people I love and grieved before but I feel so helpless hearing your voice.

We will always be here for you Chelee, I know we are not Mom but I am sure we can help you through this. I really wish I could give you a hug, for you as well as for me!! Do not be afraid to ask for help with this one Darling, ask your doctor for help, ask your family, ask us; if you need help just ask for whatever you need to help you cope with this matter. Looks like your plate is full from here.

We love you and I shall continue sending prayers for your family and yourself. Keeping you close to heart to see you through.>>Believe51

lu ann 08-17-2007 12:20 PM

I'm so sorry about the loss of your mother. My own mother lost her 13 year battle with cancer 25 years ago. It's never easy. Love, Lu Ann.

Marlys 08-17-2007 01:02 PM

Dear Chelee,
I am so sorry to hear about your loss. I want you to cherish your memories of her and know that she will always be with you in spirit. My mother died nearly 60 years ago when I was 9. Sometime I feel sorry for myself because I can't remember her very well and that I did not get to know her as a person and not just as "mother". I would give anything for that experience which you were so lucky to have.
Love and hugs,
Marlys

Brenda_D 08-17-2007 01:07 PM

Chelee, I lost my Mom last Sept., after a 9 month ordeal. Not from cancer, but from several difficult things going on all at once, that culminated in her passing.
Two months after her passing, I found a lump in my breast, and found out I had StageIV IDC.

Sometimes, it seems that life gives you more than you can stand, but with family, friends, and prayer, we pull through.

I had to look at it this way. My Mom could never have stood to see one of her kids pass before she did. Sometimes I think that it's better that she passed on before I found out I had BC, and before my nephew (her grandson) was found dead at the age of 37. She could not have taken those 2 blows.

VaMoonRise 08-17-2007 01:58 PM

Crying with You.
 
Dear Chelee,

My heart breaks along with yours with hearing this very sad news of your Mother's passing. I know how much pain you are in right in. I am sure that your insides are screaming and you think no one can hear you but yourself. Well, Sweetie I hear you.

I lost my Big Brother in 1986 to a drowning accident. He was my hero, my mentor, my protector, my best friend. I was only 17 years old at the time. I lost my boyfriend in 1989 to a drunk driver, he was on his way to see me when the accident occurred. I lost my Mother to BC in 1995. Lost my step father in 2005 to emphysema. My Mother too was my very best friend. There was nothing that we didn't share or do together. She was so beautiful, loving, nurturing, compassionate,quick witted and feisty as all get out. She loved her children more than life and we all knew it, she spoiled us rotten, always putting us before her self. I was her caregiver along with my step father while she fought this horrible ugly disease and she fought it so bravely, with such dignity and strength. Seeing what she went through back then when treatments were almost worse than the disease it's self is where I gain my strength from to fight this disease. She never complained, never asked why me or allowed herself to get depressed. She truly was a Beautiful Warrior Queen. Whenever I am terrified of something having to do with this disease I only need to think of her and I tell myself if she could go through what she did when fighting this fight and never complain than I can face whatever it is I am facing at that moment and this feeling of inner calm comes over me and I manage to get through another bump in the road. I lost my Father in 2001 to lung cancer. Although we had a turbulent relationship my whole life I was finally able to forgive him for all the pain that he caused my family and me and even asked him to walk me down the aisle on my wedding day as a true sign of my forgiveness because I had told him in the past that he would never walk me down the aisle, that I would have my step father walk me down the aisle. I got to know him as a man an individual the year before he died and I am so grateful for that time we had together. I worry about my Big Sister who I love so dearly, we have lost so much over the years already and I don't want her to lose yet another and the last member of her immediate biological family. It rips my heart out to even think about it. I know that isn't going to happen for a very long time though because I truly believe that the Greatest Physician in the world, Jesus Christ is healing me.

I know that there isn't much anyone can say to you right now that is truly comforting or that will lessen your pain but please know that we are all here for you and that if we could take away any part of the pain and loss you are feeling that we would do it in a heart beat. We are all cyber hugging you right now and praying for you. As you are thinking about your Mom and all of the wonderful memories you have of her, try to picture her as the beautiful Guardian Angel that she is now. Completely free of pain, filled only with peace, overwhelming joy and love, basking in the warmth of our Lord's omniessence and loving embrace. Reunited with loved ones who have gone before her and looking down upon you with loving eyes and a smile on her face because she knows what a beautiful child she raised and that her child is strong enough to get through this and will one day soon be able to think of all the memories you shared and once again will be able to smile because you are so strong and grateful that she was your Mother and for the time you had together and because you know that her suffering is over and that she has nothing but happiness now in her new life with our Lord and Saviour.

May time heal your heart, memories soothe and comfort your soul and the Lord bless you and yours.

Love, Warm Hugs & God Bless, Sweetie,
Nicola

VaMoonRise 08-17-2007 02:15 PM

Brenda,

Sending you lots of hugs too Sweetie. Your Mom raised a beautiful loving and oh so strong daughter. I know she is smiling down upon you and looking after you everyday.

Love,
Nicola

StillHere 08-17-2007 04:24 PM

Chelee, I too understand the loss of a mother. It has to be one of the most painfull things we have to endure. I know for about the first 2 years I always thought about how my mother would of enjoyed this or that outing or holiday, but trust me it does get easier with time. Still to this day, eight years after her death, I always try to wear her ring, or a piece of her clothing at family events. It may sound silly, but wearing something of hers helps me feel she is there joining the celebration. My hope is that she had excellent palative care. If anyone else needs help getting end of life help for their loved ones. Please contact: www.compassionandchoices.org, or call 800-247-7421 for free confidential client support. Just ask to speak to a Client Support Counselor. I am a strong supporter of hospice and end of life choices. My heart goes out to you, because it does not matter how old your are when you lose a parent, the pain is still hard to bare. Peace be with you and your family. Karen

tricia keegan 08-17-2007 04:28 PM

Chelee I'm really sorry and saddened to hear your about your Mother and will be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.

Lolly 08-17-2007 04:29 PM

Dear Chelee,
I really feel for you. I lost my mother last year, and yes, it hurts deeply. When I feel sad about my mom, I try to remember all the good times we had, and how much she loved us kids, and that helps. Try planting something in her memory, that also helps.
Many hugs, Lolly

dhealey 08-17-2007 04:49 PM

Cherlee, My heart goes out to you. I lost my mother after an eight year battle with breast cancer in l997. She was my best friend. Not a day goes by that I don't think of her now as I am fighting my own battle. Keep your happy memories of her close to your heart and may god wrap his loving arms around you to comfort you.
Debbie in North Carolina

Kim in CA 08-17-2007 05:12 PM

Dear Chelee,

I am so sorry to hear of your loss. It is so hard to say goodbye. Just know she will always be with you. My dad died 28 years ago, and sometimes I can still feel his presence. It has always been a comfort to me.

Much Love, Kim


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 04:51 PM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Copyright HER2 Support Group 2007 - 2021