CONTROVERSIAL TOPIC -- hear me out...
 

http://www.her2support.org/vbulletin...ons/icon12.gif CONTROVERSIAL SUBJECT -- please hear me out...
<HR style="COLOR: #aa8799" SIZE=1><!-- / icon and title --><!-- message -->I read ILLNESS IS A TEACHING. At first, I was offended. Surely, I did not wish for myself (or any one!) to get ca. But I read further. We all know the mindbody link goes on all day. The mind sends messages to the body, sometimes the body sends messages to the brain, asking for advice as what to do. If we consciously feed our mind with a dialogue that goes something like -- HEAL, I AM COMMANDING YOU TO HEAL AND BECOME WELL AND FUNCTIONING PROPERLY with a heart full of belief and faith in our ability to heal ourselves -- our body responds.

If we are especially stressed, full of anger, resentment, blame, remorse, great sadness, the inability to forgive, a sense of failure, FEAR, much worry and deep concern for our well-being -- our thoughts and our emotions are filled w/a great deal of negative energy. They evoke negative images to go along with them. They evoke the obvious feelings that come along with such ideas and visions. We become a magnetic field calling or drawing negative energy to us from the Universe.

However, if we consciously CHOOSE to fill our heads w/positive thoughts, desired outcomes vs feared and dreaded outcomes -- we can call miraculous results to us, manifesting our dreams. WHAT WE CONTEMPLATE ALL DAY DETERMINES THE END RESULT, for good or bad. KNOWING this power exists, we must consciously choose to be THE MASTER OF OUR FATE and actively participate is our own wellness, programming our thoughts, rather than living victimized by our thoughts. We have the power within us to take charge of our lives!!!!!

I had to work on the forgiveness thing. It was eating at my core. I couldn't let go. All my life I thought what had occured in my childhood could not be changed and therefore I would always feel sorrow for The Child That Was Me. I grieved for her. Was still angry for her. Wanted apologizes for her. Until I saw that in fact I had the power to live in The Now -- where happiness is. That the lost Soul that verbally abused me had not learned how to control his own rage emotions, brilliant though he was. I began to see him as a lost Soul who had failed. I began to feel compassion for him, more than for myself. My love for him sprung up out of no where and filled my heart. And forgiveness soon followed. I made a big ceremony of forgiving him. I wailed and sobbed and all the repressed emotions and thoughts came up out of my Id, the primal part of our mind that REMEMBERS EVERYTHING, unconsciously -- AS IF IT HAPPENED YESTERDAY. Once I freed myself, I began to live more in joy and serenity, even while fighting the ca and the ravaging side effects of the chemo. People asked me, What am I seeing? My countenance was full of bliss and tranquility.

This is what I which for each of you. Somethings to think long and hard about, I know. I pray there are lessons within this posting that will resonate with you. That you will go within yourself and connect with your True Self, at your very center, your Essence. I call it my Soul or Spirit. Once you align yourself with sacred energy, that fragment of divine energy from your Source, your world changes forever. Once you begin to identify yourself as A RADIANT SPIRIT you will become transformed. You will begin to see the world through the eyes of your Soul and love, kindness, generosity of Spirit, humble gratitude and awe will fill you up to overwhelming. That is what I wish for each one of you with all my heart. Bless your life with such KNOWINGS, please... ANDI
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A very thought-provoking post...along those lines, I read a book that I never forgot called Man's Search for Meaning, the premise of which was that we cannot control what happens to us, but we can control how we respond. I understand that positive thoughts generate positive feelings. I try to find the good (or if that's impossible, the humor) in something. I know it's easy to focus on the negative, and it's a habit we can get into without being fully conscious of it. Thanks for your post.l

We Need Not Be Victimized By Sour Thoughts
 

Yes, we can control how we RESPOND. Our illness does not define us, but rather how we choose to respond says who we truly are. I agree, always look for the good -- or the humor -- AND seek out the Lesson buried within the obstacles.

THOUGHTS CAN BE VERY ADDICTIVE. Becoming AWARE of our thought paterns and determining to alter them (with our Free Will and our power of "choice") is EMPOWERING! We need not live victimized by sour, negative, fear-riddled thoughts. We need to stop thinking of ourselves of being the victim. I think of myself as LUCKY! It could have been so much worse, I believe. My husband says if I were lucky I'd have never had bc. But I respectfully disagree. Wholeheartedly as a matter of fact. I have chosen to respond with a positive dialogue running in my head. I choose to rewrite my thoughts and go with the happy images they conjure up. That is the energy I want to put out into the Universe, KNOWING it will be sensed and responded to IN KIND.

Sending loving, healing energy to all... ANDI (BB)

Hello,

I want to make sure that I'm reading this correctly. Are you suggesting that our thoughts can influence our health? Our thoughts can influence our battle with cancer?

Just wondering.

Jen

Hi Andrea,

I was thinking of just ignoring your post as far as a response goes but thought better of it and must repond for the benefit of all my her2 friends who are struggling with recurrence and/or progression of this horrible disease.

I do agree with you when you say that we can choose how we respond to our situations BUT to insinuate (and that is a VERY LARGE BUT) that we can control our overall health by the type of attitude we exhibit is simply not true. I know many, many, many people who have VERY positive attitudes ~ have a fighting spirit and sadly have succumbed to cancer progression to NO FAULT OF THEIR OWN.

I'm sorry to come across a bit harsh on this issue but it really strikes a cord with me and I'm sure with those who have had progression. No one EVER should be made to feel that their outcomes had ANYTHING to do with their attitudes etc. It simply isn't so.

Mary Jo

Phsyiology Reflects Psychology... Absolutely!
 

Your body is a reflection of your psychological state. I am saying that treating the "symptoms" (the cancer, the bad back, the migraine) will not cure you. YOU MUST HEAL what is buried, repressed unconsciously in your Id. We each carry a "reservoir of rage" (Dr. John Sarno in THE DIVIDED MIND -- fabulous but slow read -- so much to absorb!). It lurks beneath the surface and pops up. He says the Superego believes it is protecting us by creating a malfunction or pain in our body, to distract us from delving into what is unhealed in our minds.

Searching in your mind's attic you must uncover what you've naturally repressed, too emotionally painful to investigate, we think. But once we get past that hesitation, and look for and allow ourselves to feel those horrid emotions, we become healed, free from them, free from physical dysfunction. The mindbody link is real. Our breathing, our healing, our blinking all come from signals from the body to the mind and the mind's response. Some is unconsciously carried out. But truly healing involves our being holistically/totally proactively involved!

We have all suffered traumas in our lives we'd like to hide from. Hence our reservoir of rage, coming out inappropriately at a stranger or loved one who "triggers" our reaction as the situation or a word reminds us of past emotional pain. Once we become aware of the tricks our mind plays on us, we can consciously seek to fix the psychological problems we all have. We can heal our emotional wounds. We also have the power to command our body to HEAL. THE BODY HEARS EVERYTHING YOU THINK OR WHISPER -- and takes it very literally. It responds, following orders as directed.

When I say It's killing me watching my husband suffering so much pain from the shingles he just got, I hesitate. I hear that energy. I will NOT allow it to kill me, I counter. Knowing my body will hear my thought. I correct immediately so as not to send the wrong message. I will remain well and healthy, strong, brave and determined, stable with NED! Still it hurts to see my wonderful husband in so much pain. It will not kill me, however. Because I will not allow it. I am alert to my thoughts and thought patterns all day. I monitor them, to weed out fears, wandering worries, doubts, alarm and replace the energy of my thoughts w/loving energy full of compassion, kindness, generosity, gratitude and awe. I then reap a sense of joy and serenity knowing I am doing my job -- staying well, directing my body to do as it is supposed to, per my instructions.

Sending loving, healing energy... ANDI (BB)

Hi Andi! I think about my thoughts like sunshine and rain. It seems to me that when I control my thinking, I am adding the healing power of sunshine into my body and spirit. Not sure what depth to which the healing goes, but I know that my thoughts give me peace or give me frustration. I'm a retired librarian and history teacher (plus other adventures) and I love ideas and the freedom to think and believe as I'm brave enough to do. My mom never restricted what I read and I am today so very grateful to her. Can't read the scarey stuff even now, but find myself seeking my own truths about this disease, just as I had to find my own relationship so many years ago with God. Thanks for stirring up the "thinking pot"! Blessings and good thoughts to you, mary anne

Mary Anne
 

What a great thinker you are! Sunshine and rain. Good visual. I wish you SUNSHINE AND JOY AND ALL YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE. Yes, that energy is very therapeutic and very healing. I picture a radiant white Light coming from above through the top of my head and washing through my body. Divine, Universal healing touches every cell in my body. I do this daily. And of course I feel bathed in it, calm, serene, joyful as a result of this practice. When the rain comes I know it is necessary to cleanse myself of the toxic thoughts. I experience them, vent them and release them as quickly as I can. I substitue thoughts full of love, compassion, kindness, generosity, authentic verbalized gratitude for my many blessings and awe.

I try as best I can to stay clear of what ifs and I'm just afraid thats. But they do occur. They need to be wrestled with and then booted out. They are hazardous to my health, I know.

I love your free, open mindedness. You are indeed brave. It takes a lot of courage to take this journey. But, I have discovered, that it also takes a valiant effort to think w/yr innate spirituality. It is life-altering. Transforming! I'd never have taken this road had the ca not occured. Which is quite amazing. We are always where we need to be. I have taken the Lessons and kept them close. I too don't read the scary stuff. I can come up w/my own scary scenarios. I am not a statistic. IF ONE PERSON HAS SURVIVED YOUR KIND OF CANCER -- THEN YOU CAN SURVIVE! We each have the potential to be a miracle, calling our desired destiny to us, healing ourselves with faithful determination every day, throughout the day, as we rise up and as we lay down. I thank God every day for sustaining me and enabling me to survive and enjoy the gift of each day.

Blessings and good thoughts to you and all... ANDI (BB)

Andrea I appreciate your right to believe whatever you wish, but to post your thoughts as if they are the complete truth and answer doesn't sit right with me.

I think you are way off in the conclusions you reach. Yes we can control our thoughts, and positive thoughts make our overall QOL much, much better.

But the concept that some inner pain or hurt that we need to uncover, is the core or our illness just flies too far off the radar for me.

I'd feel more comfortable if you were more open with the idea that these are YOUR thoughts and opinions, and are sharing them for discussion, rather than the blanket way you are putting them out there.

This sounds like just another version of blame the victim. I do not believe that I caused my cancer by anything I did or did not do, or by any repressed anger or hurt feelings. I'm also the Queen of positive thinking and positive living, even though stage 4, I snow ski 30 days a year, water-ski, rock climb, motorcycle ride, play golf and travel extensively.

While all this makes my life fuller and happier it does not cure my cancer.....

I wonder, is the 'you are what you think' a feature of humans or all life forms? Is llness and death in dogs, cats, chickens, mice, etc. due to psychological states?

Andrea, I too respect your right to hold your own views, but that is all they are, not facts. It does seem that our thoughts and feelings have a physiological effect on the immune system, and even without any of the scientific studies that would make sense. That's really important, I agree, but I think it's still only a small part of the whole picture. To suggest that you can heal yourself by the power of positive thinking, is to also suggest that you are to blame if you don't heal, and that I feel is quite wrong and unhelpful.

Since having bc I seek out things and people who make me laugh. I go and see funny films, and I'm slowly easing away from people who I now realise bring me down and sap me of my energy and love for life. I look on the bright side more, and consciously count my blessings ( I now see how many I have, too). I take care of myself more, walk up the stairs instead of taking the lift, take regular vitamins and supplements, eat better, make an effort to see friends and tell people I love them. I appreciate my ever-increasing, post-chemo energy, and notice the small stuff more.
I'm sure we'd all agree with you that we need to 'think positive', and if nothing else, it makes for a happier way of living and being. Anything else, like the effect it may or may not have on our immune system, is an added bonus.

I don't want to put a complete downer on what you've said, but I would just urge you to take extra care over how you say things, perhaps. We actually just don't know what would or wouldn't happen if we did nothing at all to look after our minds, bodies and souls.
I can see that you want to encourage people to take responsibility for their own happiness, and I like that in you and your previous postings. I'm glad to be reminded. BUT, we can't take 100% responsibility for whether we beat cancer or not. I'm wondering if maybe you didn't quite mean it like that, but that's how I understood it from what you said.

I Agree with you Andy
 

I believe that's the reason am still around am extremely positive, no matter what, or where,who. I simply put my mind to work and puff!!!..

Sending positive vibes to you all..


With much love..

We Each Have Our Beliefs
 

I am not a doctor or medical professional. I am a bit of a professional patient, as the result of the last 12 yrs. I have read extensively on spirituality and have found many lessons and messages that resonated with my heart. And I believe these things to my core. I share them for whatever they are worth to you, praying they ill inspire you to think long and hard and draw your own conclusions. I mention THE DIVIDED MIND by Dr. John Sarno, who I actually saw in 1980 for a debilitating agonizing bad back that orthopod wanted to operate on, but I refused that knowing many who'd had the surgery and had either no good result or fleetingly good. Dr. Sarno is a physiatrist. He deals with the entire body, treating the entire patient, versus just the symptoms. Not getting at the cause. He is a professor at NYU, was head of the NYU Medical Center outpatient clinic and taught at Rusk Institute. His views are controversial. Mainstream docs don't see bodily malfunction as he does. After two yrs of constant pain at the age of 40, reaching for a way to live w/my diagnosed "degenerating disc disease" (which was visualized on MRI w/a protruding disc that was oozing AND the spasms of which could be felt by the doc's hands) -- this healer taught me about the power of our thoughts.

I had been alert to the mindbody connection in the '70s, watching PBS specials w/studies on the topic and was blown away by the power of the mind. A young adolescent had a very serious illness, I can't recall precisely what. But what struck me was they had given her some new med that "cured" her, or stopped the symptoms. But she was young and could not stay on this drug longterm. They began infusing her w/the drug while exposing her to the very pungent odor of roses (or some such flower). Slowly they weaned her off the drug. Her body began to respond whenever exposed to that odor that had trained her brain to respond (much like a conditioned response). She "took" the odor regularly, and remained well. That's incredible I thought.

Another woman, dx as a split personality, would change character before the doc. One was a diabetic. When she believed she was the other personality, her glucose was normal. When she believed she was the diabetic personality, her glucose soared. Isn't that interesting I thought.

So Dr. Sarno, who's book is poignant and worth slowly reading and digesting, explained the power of our thoughts w/lectures and demonstrations -- as I began to see that I was stuck in a cycle of fear/pain/fear. The more pain I felt, the more fearful I became of having a recurrence of total dibilitation, the tenser my muscles became, squeezing and pinching nerves creating more pain. My God I have a degenerating disease of the SPINE! That means I will only get worse than I already am! More fear. Which created more pain. Around and around in a circle. Dr. Sarno explained that each time I felt the "gasping" pain out of nowhere I should stop what I was doing and go back and search my mind for the exact thought I was thinking at the time the pain struck. He predicted that I would prove to myself that EVERY time I would see a connection to a stressful thought (from what will I make for dinner to how will I deal w/my youngsters temper tantrums). As I proved this to myself over the next wks, I began to see that my thoughts were creating the gasping, debilitating pain, along w/my body's help in tensing, etc. Within a month I was pain free. My back was healed. No meds. No rehab.

I felt no guilt about having caused my own pain. It was not consciously intentional. It is the way our minds impact our bodies. I took the lesson and began to apply the power of our thoughts in positive ways. I had no desire t punish myself. I happen to like myself very much. My Spirit wants what is best for me. But I never even knew it existed before bc. My ca led me on a spiritual journey that enhanced my QOL immeasurably. I found serenity, enriched joy, greater compassion, more kindness, awe and gratitude than I ever imagined possible. And that is what I wish for all of you. So I try to share my experience. I do not wish to change your mind, but make you think a bit, as Dr. Sarno made me think. Test it out. See if it works for you.

Surely I do not blame the victim. But, in hundreds of ways, we are all victims, beyond bc. We have all suffered traumatic events in Life. Not to would be remarkable. Pain makes us grow, makes us more OPEN to receiving lessons and messages. Bc has opened my heart to become a vessel for Universal Love. I meditate with my hands out and palms up, as I read that this makes us more able to "receive" energy from the Universe. As I think loving, kind, compassionate, generous, grateful thoughts full of my goals and dreams for myself and those whose lives have touched mine -- that energy will draw LIKE ENERGY from the Universe to me.

Never feel you have cursed your life. But rather see a way to bless your life. Don't respond with anger and outrage. See the gift of such KNOWINGS -- the PERSONAL EMPOWERMENT they offer. I wish you all bliss and tranquility, empowerment and healing and generosity of Spirit... ANDI

CONTROVERSIAL SUBJECT -- please hear me out...

Hi Andrea,

You said it was controversial and you are right. I work with a healer and we have similar, sometimes heated, discussions. On this journey I find it much easier to have this perspective when my counts and scans are good. I find that this perspective adds to my guilt and sadness when my situation takes a turn in the wrong direction.

Love, Hope, and Peace,

Carolyns

Andrea:

I am appalled that you would insinuate that any of us gave ourselves this disease. Have you ever heard of GENETICS among other things. Give me a break.

This board is for HELPING one another. Not blame! I am sending YOU prayers.
-kim

Sorry, I disagee
 

I REALLY appreciate what you are saying, and I am really not questioning your right to choose your own beliefs and your own path, but I do think your comments are a bit inflamatory and disrespectful to those brave (and positive) people who have battled bc and lost.

Regarding your primary premise, I have to agree with Maryjo and the others who have so clearly articulated a more reasoned point of view. And, I have a simple question for you.....if you take your thought process to its logical conclusion, why are you still on Herceptin? If you follow your own counsel wouldn't you be able to do without it? It seems you might want to lecture others about swimming in the deep end of the pool, while you hold on to the ledge....

Interesting post, Andrea. I do agree with you to a point, but I just wanted to share that when I was diagnosed in 2001 my prognosis was "poor" and I had the worst attitude. I walked around under a dark cloud for months, and my thoughts consisted of "I'M DOOMED"- I did show up faithfully for chemo/radiation and a year of Herceptin and slowly, slowly I realized that I wasn't dying after all...No one is more surprised than I am that I am still here six years later. Now I am filled with joy and wonder and look for the positive in everything, but this attitude definitely came about AFTER I had treatment that worked for me. I give credit to God, my doctors and medical science (especially Herceptin), but my attitude was certainly not what healed me at the time. I seem to have been healed in spite of my poor attitude, while other positive people in support groups, etc. died. I do think a positive attitude can enrich your life, but don't think necessarily makes a difference in the outcome of your illness.

Ca Is Not Your Fault
 

MY CANCER IS NOT MY FAULT. Absolutely, I agree. I do not in any way blame myself or feel any guilt or shame. I have always done the best I could at the time. But we are all here to learn lessons, and to love one another and ourselves! Yes it is fabulous that after having bc I am kinder to myself. I see the value of laughter and loving. Very therapeutic and healing. And joyful. It has taught me to walk away from people who bring me down (toxic relationships), people who are not giving of themselves, lack generosity of Spirit and a loving nature. They are takers. I surround myself w/loving people who appreciate me for the True Me. They see my happy smiling face full of tranquility and marvel. I appreciate them for the wise and wonderful Spirits they are and I keep them close, if not literally by phone and email.

I was always optimistic, which is handy when facing an adversity like bc, but I never saw how truly blessed I am. I count all the tiny things, I see the sublime in the ordinary, literally! Now. I have learned much since being dx. I have read much, as all of us have, but I don't pour over the factors and percentages, I focus instead, on spirituality. For me, this is fulfilling and gratifying. It enhances my life immeasurably. It makes me feel happier, more alive and more in harmony than ever before. More than I imagined possible.

I pray for more energy. I watch my diet, eating the good, and rejecting the tempting but bad. I see an oncol/hematol/nutitional expert who has given me multiple supplements (to boost my imm sys, strengthen my heart, fight free radicals, anti-oxi, energize, etc.) Mainstream docs think it's a waste of time. I respect their opinion, but respectfully add supplements anyway, w/my 1 onc blessings. I do my best to take care of my temple (body, mind) and of course my Soul.

Surely I know too many who had positive attitudes but lost their battle. I grieve for their loss to this world, to me. I loved them dearly and tried my best to support them. We all have weak moments and some times we find we stray off the positive trail. I know I have. And how difficult it was to get my footing back. I have failed numerous times. None of us is perfect. Perfect is boring as I see it. I am human. I do the best I can at the time. No one could ask more of themselves. When I was in a valley, lost and groping I did not feel angry or disappointed at myself. I simply tried my best to pick myself up. It would take a comment from my daughter, Pami, who is surely an old Soul, to say to me -- You've lost touch with your spiritual Self. Simple as that. I'd rally. I'd go back to meditating and connecting deep inside myself with my Spirit. And miraculously, all of a sudden, the ME I love being was back!

So, I wish for all of you never to blame yourselves, but to keep searching for lessons and messages and healing in every capacity -- body, mind and Soul. I send you all loving energy at all times because in the end that is what Life is all about -- going within and being lifted up, reaching out and loving one another. Don't beat yourself up -- EVER. Be as kind to yourself as you would your own child or your best friend. That's what you deserve. And keep on doing your best. No one can ask more of you. I wish you wellness in your brave fight, strength to carry on and belief in yourself and your own EMPOWERMENT. That is your birthright. ANDI (BB)

Sorry You Feel Offended
 

When I broke my ankle, just after Taxotere I did not feel I had caused the accident. The pot hole created the problem, the way I looked at it. When I was dx w/bc some suggested I go the spiritual route. NO. I would do the mastec/reconst tram flap/and all the chemo AND do the spiritual thing. When I recurred, again absolutely I went w/the cutting edge opin of all 4 oncs -- w/the most aggressive weapon they had in their arsenal, to match my aggressive Her2 gene, found in between episodes. I thank God for Herceptin every day.

I also thank God for my bld pressure meds. Like I would imagine a diabetic is grateful for insulin. My husband's grandmother died of diabetes, before insulin came along. We who benefit from Herceptin (or Tykerb) live in humble gratitude.

Those who have failed in their battle were no less strong, brave and determined. All that we see is not all there is. Reasons beyond my imagination must have been in play. Perhaps they were needed in the Spiritual Realm for a task only they could manage. We are each unique. Why would you think to besmirch their memory w/such ugly thoughts?

I am still a warrior, holding on to the edge as best I can. I do not have any desire to LECTURE you. Sorry you feel that is so. Just trying to offer the best advice I have accumulated over the last 12 yrs to those struggling. Offering my hand -- to grab yours and help you over the edge w/me. That is my motivation. Nothing sinister. It is a loving gesture. Please don't be offended or angry w/my offering. If you are so filled w/harsh criticism that you don't want a spot on the lifeboat -- that is your choice. You do not have to think like me. What I post is a suggestion for your consideration. You are an adult, fully capable of making your own choices. Just some ideas you may not have considered that might be worthy of your attention.

I have nothing but respect and loving admiration for ev women on this board and ev woman I have known that has been thrust on this journey. None of us volunteered for this. But here we are, trying our best to do all we can do to help ourselves. It is what it is is where I went immediately (mentally) when dx. There was no escaping that. But I knew I could choose how I would respond. So I chose to be proactive, informed and take the spiritual path, having gleaned many lessons on the mindbody connection and now using it for my survival. And of course wanting to share these lessons w/all who are OPEN. To blossom you must open. If you are not ready, or choose not to think of the power you have been blessed with -- perhaps you will find other lessons, and hopefully, share them w/all of us. I promise I won't attack you for your opinions. I won't take them personally. I won't feel they fly in the face of those who've fought hard and lost.

Isn't it natural for all of us to wonder WHO ARE LIFE'S VICTORS? Who are the Olympic gold medalists? How did they get there? Was it luck? Or is there a common thread. I have noted this since I was a child, struggling daily against a raging father who was, as I see now in retrospect, a lost Soul. I felt mortally wounded and became mature quickly, fighting for my life against verbal assaults. When someone on TV asked the winners WHY DO YOU THINK YOU WON? I turned and listened intently. Same if they asked the "favorites" why they thought they lost. I turned and became riveted. I saw the common thread. What they all had in common was this -- they each KNEW they would win, or FEARED they would lose. They each SAW themselves winning over and over in the last yr, or vice versa. This lesson impacted me profoundly. Going within myself was how I remained optimistic, open, friendly, loving, compassionate and kind. It all had to happen to make me evolve into who I am today. And I am grateful for it all. No anger. No resentment or blame. No inability to forgive. I am free -- to BE. Sending you loving energy to nourish your Soul... ANDI

Dear Appalled
 

Try living with more generosity of Spirit. I INSINUATE nothing. I am very straight forward. About myself, my feelings, my thoughts, precisely. Dear God, you, nor any or us, gave ourselves this disease. Do not twist my words. Perhaps you should read some of my posts. Or perhaps you're too busy being offended, defensive, angry and appalled to read any of my posts. Perhaps you could learn something -- if you are OPEN, in mind and heart. Let go of the rage, it's really not good for you. Don't mean to be offensive. Progressive maybe in my thinking, but surely many experts on holistic med agree w/the premise. Feel free to negate it. Absolutely do not feel "responsible" for yr bc. I do not say I am responsible for it, BUT... Read about Dr. Sarno and my bad back. That might help give you perspective. No one is out to get you. I am simply offering you what I have found. I want to share what I see as incredibly EMPOWERING. I want you to feel personally empowered. It is grand. Sending you loving, healing energy regardless of your point of view... I do not judge any one. It is not my place to judge. ANDI

I Wonder About The Cats And Dogs Too
 

IF YOU FIGURE THAT ONE OUT, let us all know. I do know that when I stopped looking at 1 of my puppies that we rescued as a lost cause, scared to death I would lose him and started to think differently -- he became healed. He had mange, no hair on his face, neck and chest. Only red raw skin, looking a burn victim, obviously in dire pain, wouldn't eat or drink, crept into corners, ready to die. I would look at him with so much FEAR. Then I opened the bk the rescue lady gave me. It happened to open to a chapter called The Spiritual Realm. The vet was from Cornell, mainstream for 10, and had become a holistic vet.

I read voraciously. Then I picked my Chase up and put him in my lap, this pathetic little puppy. I told him, and thought, I see (NOT YOUR RAW HORRID FACE, but) your beautiful Soul and I meant it with all my heart. I told him not to be afraid. (I'd known that, but forgot, I knew it w/regard to ME, but forgot when faced w/his sickness). I told him I was right there with him. That I'd make him well. I stroked him and kissed him for a half hr. When I put him down he walked perkily away. No one had paid so much attention to him in the 4 mnths of his life. When I returned to the vet he was amazed. Why I asked. Because when a dog is that sick they usually don't make it. He tested for the mites that were ravaging his immune system and body and he was clear. I smiled at my husband, a non-believer. Chase is now 4 yrs old and we have his brother Scamp too. They bring much joy and love to our home and our lives. I thank God ev day for the blessing of these boys. And for still being alive! It's all so wonderfully miraculous.

And I am grateful you Audrey are still here. Perhaps God and/or your Spirit had your back and got you through. Regardless, I am glad you made it through and with great attitude to boot! Hurray for you. Live each day in joy and peace. Be well and stay well. ANDI

Adriana You Are A Brave And Bright Soul
 

Not because you may agree w/me but because that's simply who you are, from all your postings. I love that about you. You are OPEN and have the courage to mentally meander a bit. You are so full of positivity and joy and that is what you draw to you. So glad you are a Survivor. You are an Olympic gold medalist in my book. A winner. May it continue for many decades to come. I sense it will... Sending you loving, healing energy, ANDI

Didn't Mean To Stir Up Such Negative Energy!
 

It distresses me that you who are outraged feel that way. Can't we just agree to disagree. Not take it personally? Not feel the need to fight. Every word I post is sent with loving energy, in the hopes of being inspiring, yes thought-provoking but never to stir up anger. That is so shocking to me. Why do you think those of you who felt so offended by the idea that we are so empowered?

I do not claim responsibility for causing my bc, but see the line that connects the dots, now in hindsight. It was amazing, yet I felt no guilt. I knew I would never do anything to hurt anyone, especially myself. I am a pacifist through and through. Maybe if you were threatening someone I loved dearly I might come at you, but otherwise... Just not an angry person. Esp since bc.

Much more willing to listen and learn, or reject, views. Politics -- I stay clear. There I become passionate. But otherwise, we each have our views. Most people I email, off this board, tell me they carry my messages with them in their pocketbooks or keep them in a pile on their night stand for easy access. Some times during the day they return to my words for strength in getting through their battle. This thrills me, obviously, as my intent is always to do just that. They treasure my words. I am saddended by those who reacted so vehemently. I still send you loving energy, and pray you will calm yourself and find your connection to your spiritual essence, at your core. We are here to support one another. I have NEVER gotten such opposition. Guess you're very strong minded, though many I communicate w/are precisely that yet "get" it. So sorry if you don't. Just promise you won't go feeling guilty. And to all who've fought and lost the struggle, I do not know why they were taken but I love and miss them. I can't see why from my perspective, but they fought hard and somehow lost anyway. Would love to figure it out, but maybe it's not something those of us on the Physical Plane are able to see, sadly. It appears that it's just not fair, makes no sense, but I have faith that their is a Divine Intelligence with a Plan and purpose, beyond our ability to grasp.

Meantime, keep doing what you know, stay strong, brave and determined and feel as much joy and serenity as you possibly can. Each day is a gift. Those on this board know this well. Not a single day goes by that I don't say thank you with all my heart. Out loud. PEACEFUL THOUGHTS TO YOU ALL... ANDI

Controversial Topic...
 

This whole line of thought is certainly not a new one among people who have cancer (or amidst the "wisdom" of people who have become "experts" because they know a few people who have cancer.) It makes me think of the many people who observe that I am still alive after 3 1/2 years with mets to the liver because I have such a positive attitude: I've gotten to the point where I just chuckle and say, "Boy, that means that heaven is filled with people with negative attitudes! It doesn't sound like a very nice place to be...."
Edie (MI)

Controversial yes
 

Great discussion - lots of spirit for sure! I agree with everyone!

Andrea, I admire your energy and committment to this and read your posts with great hunger! I mostly agree with your opinions and often wonder HOW you can keep control over your thoughts - I have a tough time here, especially when things go south. But there is little real debate over whether there is a mind-body connection. More and more research comes out every year on the power of the mind-body-spirit connections. We still just don't know enough about it and maybe we never will.

I don't buy the "I caused my own cancer" riff - and I don't think Andrea is suggesting this - but I do believe that my thoughts and feelings affect my physiological processes, including immune response. So my mind has some power to tip the scales for or against my health. Tipping the scales adds or detracts some %, along with treatment, general health, and the pure biology of the disease.

Another interesting but slow read is "Healing Words" by Dr. Larry Dossey. This book looks beyond the mind-body connection to the power of prayer and other "non-local" influences - i.e. your thoughts can influence someone elses physiology! I've read this book twice and come away less with answers and more with a sense of wonder.

I believe our bodies have a lot of intelligence for healing, and we can try to harness or direct it with our thoughts. Or with our prayers, or the prayers of others. We are all, basically, just energy. We do what we can to take control, or the illusion of control but in the end it's really in the hands of a higher power.

Great topic - and nice job, ladies and gents, in having this discussion in the spirit of love and support! That's why this is the ONLY board I have "exposed" myself to by posting instead of just lurking!

Chris

Well Andrea, if what you say is true, I should be dead of myriad diseases ages ago. Yet I lived a very healthy life until 65, never went near doctors, ranted and railed at every political turn of this country, never hesitated to bad mouth doctors, lawyers, indian chiefs, drug companies, oil companies, and any other entities or people that annoyed me. I haven't a positive thought in my head, never had, and never will. That all being said, I enjoy life and my own cynicism and I hope to continue for a long while to come. So I guess I'm with Maryjo, Erin, and Kimber on this one.

Chrisy I Love You
 

Yes, Thanks for that. A lot of Spirit. Not mean-spirited. Not nasty. Just passionate. I love that take. I'm going to own it. Yes tip the scale in yr favor. Right on. Who knows what %. But ev inch helps. One step at a time. Will check out HEALING WORDS by Larry Dossey. EVERY THOUGHT IS LIKE A PRAYER. EVERY PRAYER IS A POTENTIAL MIRACLE. So our thoughts and prayers are potent! How grand is that?! We must do what we have the power to do.

Thanks, Chrisy for not just lurking. Love your input! Love you.

As for controlling or re-programming yr thoughts -- that's quite the challenge, believe me I know. In my early 20s, a 100 yrs ago, I lived haunted and taunted my thoughts recalling my trauma of a childhood. I couldn't get free. It was only after bc that I began reading spiritual bks and found that we need not remain in the role of victim. I grew from thinking I can't change what was and must live with it to -- It taught me much, I will take the lessons and use them well. I began to re-write my thoughts and put plenty of love into them.
I mean this pure, unconditional Universal Love that seemed to be drawn to me
as I prepared for my mastec. I was in my pool in my backyard in Dix Hills, LI, bobbing tippy toe, gently treading water, almost in the deep end, but still able to touch bottom. I lifted my face to the sun and felt this Inner Voice say with great authority -- I'VE SEEN THIS MOVIE AND IN THE END, THE HEROINE (ME) LIVES. It hit me w/such a profound faith and certainty it has never left me. I felt the sun as the Light from a Higher Power blessing me and already healing me.

Now as I meditate I recapture that moment of CONNECTING which empowers me to chose the words I will think upon all day, knowing what we think all day becomes our reality. This keeps me buoyant and believing in my power to impact my destiny.

No, I did not cause my bc. Certainly not directly. But circuitously, perhaps, full of my childhood anger, resentment and blame for The Poor Child That Was Me. I wanted to stand up for her, demand apologies and make her heal. I was just going about it all wrong. I came to heal that Child and her emotional wounds with a loving Spirit, compassion for my poor Father and then the capacity to forgive (vs dwell in negative blame and such). THAT WAS INCREDIBLY HEALING. It put me on the path to surviving. Chemo helped. Surely Herceptin continues to help. Foraging in my mental attic and working at being grounded makes me feel joyful and tranquil, which in turns makes me well -- I BELIEVE. I wish the same for all the brave, daring, well-informed warriors on this board. Every single one! Always... ANDI

Oh Grace
 

Guess cynicism and venting (which is very therapeutic) works for you. Along w/stubborness, which I am as well, and has worked well for me in refusing to give in or give up. Glad you find joy all the same. That is what you deserve, along w/wellness. Sending you healing energy which I hope you will accept... Smiling anyway. You made me laugh, you tough cookie you. That's what it takes, you know! ANDI

Edie
 

Can't find your post but got your message. Sounds like the is the cup half full or half empty perspective. Heaven, or the Spiritual Realm is a lovely place. Negative attitudes don't necessarily kill you. If hatred and vengeance didn't kill Hitler long before he did it himself, and Saddam Hussein lived and thrived for so long -- that's a mystery indeed. Again, all we see is not all there is. Are my dogs Sassafras and Jezebel in Heaven. I'm thinking they must be. I'm looking forward to seeing them again.

Glad you're doing well and sending you loving, happy, healthy energy... ANDI

Amen, Andi
 

Dearest Andi,
There are many who will be offended by your post, but I, for one, am standing in a field of sunshine clapping my hands together in praise of your bravery. After reading "The Buddha in your mirror" as well as numerous publications and writings, I can humbly and happily applaud you for telling the truth. It is a hard pill to swallow, though much as chemo, diet, exercise, wholistic treatment (meaning the whole of us, Including our thoughts and the way we view the world, our bodies, others, our spirituality, etc.) and it has everything to do with our health. It has been debated for years that our thoughts (angry, hurtful, childhood trauma, stress, etc) can cause our immune systems to begin breaking down and opening the door for disease.
I was one of those people. Angry at the state of my life, raped as a child, raised by a single mom who was barely able to provide for us 4 children, fell into the drugs of the sixties. And yet, I loved other people and animals and the world around me with a passion and yet, all those around me had no idea of the unresolved pain I was living with. Each and every one of them thought I was extremely positive about life, happy and a fighter. The truth is I was drowning....and then I was diagnosed.
I don't suggest that is every one's story or cause of their illness, but I do believe that our thoughts are tantamount to our health......physical, emotional, and spiritual.
I am the same person I was all those years ago, but I have come to face to face with fear, and it has changed my life. In the very blackness of the night, a light so bright and warm covers me with blankets of love.
Thank you, Andi. I send you my love and prayers, Vickie

Wow....
 

I believe what Andi is trying to share wtih us is that the "the mind helps
heal the body"...no one can deny that when your thoughts are happy
you deal best with physical discomforts....why does it seem so?

How does a Mother lift a baby grand piano that fell on top of her child?
How does the runner who is exhausted and at his last breath manage to
finish the race and win? The list is endless..our minds are powerful.

I do not for a second think that Andi is saying that we caused our cancer.
But rather that when we are not able to lift our spirit and soul we can
cause our immune system to falter. I think we can all relate to a situation
when we were down or depressed - did you find that your body was more
prone to colds, feeling tired and a host of other physcial issues.

I know she meant to share a wholesome part of herself with us and
certainly did not suggest that we caused our cancer. We have the power
and the ability to make chocies...It is easier for us to work in harmony
with the mind and body.

Hugs to All,
Jean

Andi
 

Your "pool story" really resonated with me. Shortly before my (completely unexpected!) mets diagnosis, I had a dream which I later realized was a message.

Mind Magic
 

Andrea all I can say is Amen to that! I have a friend who has has Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma since 1982, and at the time a major Cancer Clinic told him to go home to his newly wed wife of a year(who just found out she was pregnant) and get ready to die, only not that nice. He got a second opinion from the doctor we will be seeing June 19. That doctor said, no Eddie, I will not let you die. Of course, we know that it is not all in the doctor's hands. And so did my little buddy, Eddie!! Eddie is my husband's longtime friend and a major positive influence about fighting someone tells you is useless. We cannot let them give us death sentences!! We ARE the masters of our own future, and the mind is the best medicine known to man!! Eddie has told my husband many times that: YOU MUST MAKE YOUR MIND KNOW IT WILL BE HELPING YOU CONQUER THIS!! YOUR MIND MUST BELIEVE YOUR BODY WILL NOT BE ALLOWED TO DIE OR GIVE UP!! I have taken many Psychology classes and the mind amazes me always! Right now hubby is reading many books and the one that is mostly in his hands regarding this topic is: "Mind Magic" and he says it is a great read, try to check it out. Also, if you asked an Oncologist if he would give chemo to his Breast Cancer Mother, he would say NO!! He would also give her the treatment because it is all the ammo he has. But she does not, she has her mind and her undying desire to live!! Thanks for the thoughts of the day, The Mind Is A Terrible Thing To Waste!!!!!>Waiting For A Miracle>..Believe51..(Marie G)

Girls,Girls,Girls.....
 

I do not think Andrea wanted anyone of us to be appalled or offended, this topic was just a discussion. Everyone's health achievements come from many forms of tactics. Chemotherapy, excercise, eating right and avoiding sugar, supplements, maintaining a good doctor, asking the right questions, etc. etc. and MIND POWER. "In conjuction with everything". Andrea loves us all and means no harm I am sure. I think what she is saying here, is that the mind is another tool we can use to fight and that it is a very powerful tool. We all know that the will to live has to do with mind power. We all have the right to be offended, but some might be offended knowing that others believe it is all in GOD'S Hands!! Keep an open mind and I hope I did not hurt or offend any one of you girls, I love you all too!!>>Waiting For A Miracle...Believe51..(Marie G)

P.S: WE ARE ALL HERE TO HELP EACH OTHER AND OUR OPINIONS ARE NOT ALWAYS SEEN THE SAME BY OTHERS, OUR GOALS ARE ALL THE SAME!!!

Andi - thanks for your post
 

I was drawn to what you had to say and I understand what you are saying.

I also understand the thoughts of the other ladies. Although I have always been a very positive person and very open minded, I have issues like everyone else. I have been trying to work on these issues through the mind/body healing method.

I can't say that I would totally depend on that for my cure, but I also see where it could be of benefit to my immune system and soul.

I am one of the fortunate one's that has survived this cancer for the last 11 1/2 years and have lived with active cancer for the last several years. There were many other ladies on our board that were brave and galant fighters that were not as fortunate. Why I am still here, I don't know but I do know that I will continue my fight with all the strength of my being. I dont blame anyone for my cancer and I definately do not blame myself. I think of myself as a "chosen one" and that there must be a purpose/plan for me.

I am going to continue working on that positive thinking in hopes of getting to that peaceful place in my mind.

I have printed your post and will read it for inspiration.

Thanks Andi and have a great day.

Hello Andi,

It is my firm belief that one's response to treatment is based on poorly understood genetic quirks. If it makes you feel good to think that your fabulous resonse to treatment is because of your own free will, well that's your take on the world. I think it is a little heartless to broadcast it to women who aren't so lucky, but I guess that makes me a cynic, right?

I know we'd all like to think that we have some control over cancer, and there are many ways that 'we' try to gain it...thinking warm fuzzy thoughts, taking supplements, praying to our God.

Me, I'm just hoping that I have the right genetic quirk that equals a good response to all the poison I've consumed in this fight.

And I'm wishing everyone peace, strength and courage in their battle.

Jen

Offended?
 

Dear Andi: I love your postings. Did someone get offended by it?

I can't imagine anyone being upset over "your" inspirational view on Life and possibly Death. As you mentioned we are unique, and as such we have our own way to deal with breast cancer issues.

I'm like you, I prefer to be known as a warrior, determined, fearless, commited to trustworthy causes, loving, courageous, etc.., you get the point.

People who have determination to live and have no resentment, nor feel victimized by this disease, have a positive attitude, surrender themselves to whatever comes their way, accept without anger and thrive to make the best of -even- the most horrible experiences in life, THOSE are the REAL SURVIVORS.

It has been documented, positive attitude would help you live longer.

I have this experience: My neighbor was dx with bc after my diagnosis, her cancer recurred shortly before mine did. She was so upset, I couldn't believeit, I did not like to be around her, I felt compassion for her, but everytime I would talk to her she would make statements such as: "I do not understand why me, when other people are mean spirited and am a good person. I see people traveling all over the world, with money and a good life and why me. Well, sadly she's no longer with us. She died just after two years after the recurrence. I cannot imagine how bitter she must have been lying in bed waiting to die.

I am thankful to God, the scientists, my doctor, nurses and everyone who's sharing this journey with me.

I'm not a victim, I AM A SURVIVOR, LIVING A GREAT LIFE. I'M HAVING THE BEST TIME EVER!!!!

Vicki -- I Feel Your Applause And Loving Energy
 

Thanks so much for sharing your experience. That takes courage, I know. I too was always seen w/a smile on my face, happy serenity beaming from me. I loved Life and people and the world. But deep inside I too was lost and groping.

My readings say that unhealed, unresolved emotions are reflected in our genetically weakest area. Some get migraines, some get stomach issues, etc. Some have been eating the wrong foods for their body to perform at peak level, unbeknownst to them (or they'd surely unequivocally alter that pattern). Some eat whatever they want, much junk food plus smoke and don't get sick till they are in their 90s. Its all fascinating and confusing, for us and the professionals. But we do the best we can. I send you my love and prayers and thank you heartily for yours. I have written your beautiful sentence down -- "IN THE VERY BLACKNESS OF THE NIGHT A LISGHT SO BRIGHT AND WARM COVER ME WITH BLANKETS OF LOVE". What a remarkable and radiant Soul you are! It is an honor to know you. Stay in touch, please. Sending loving, healing energy your to help in your struggle to be and stay a Survivor.

BTW -- I admire ev woman fighting this brave fight that calls upon ev shred of strength and grace we can muster -- whether they win or lose. I applaud them, admire them, grieve for them and know they did their very best. Big hugs... ANDI

The chances that a woman purposefully or unconsciously did something to trigger bc or promote it is remote, if any. Instead of blaming, we need to encourage each other to look at our situation differently, without guilt and shame.Let's uplift each other, make the best of worst circumstances, and see bc as an opportunity where we can help each other survive and feel better about ourselves.

Just wanted to add that I think the author of this thread was trying to help others, despite some contraversial views.
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Adriania
 

I love your Spirit! You encapsulate what I am trying to transmit. You have the recipe down. I never asked why me. I didn't even cry. (At least not the 1st go round, the met stunned me for a while thinking -- I'M DYING. It's incurable, inoperable and I will be on long term chemotherapy for the rest of my life, said my onc slowly and w/obvious sadness and pain. Those words rang in my head. I couldn't speak to anyone. I was processing the info. Went for 4 opin. 1 onc said incurable, ca is incurable, it is a chronic disease, but we can manage it, get you in to remission. Inoperable? You're better off without the surg. It'll weaken you to fight the side effects of the chemo. Longterm chemo -- there are new kinder gentler chemos you can take. And if they don't work, we've got doz more. You are healthy. I laughed. Aside frm the ca I was healthy. You have a great attitude, a great support team (husb, dghtrs, friends) -- you'll do fine! I embraced that attitude, after thinking I'd just heard the worst possible words from my 1st onc (who I still see and love). He has 3 dghtrs, he'd known me for 3 yrs, was shaken. I forgive him. He is a good man and a great onc.

But his 1st words sounded like something you hear in soap opera. They were the worst words you could imagine hearing. A death sentence. I'd been on chemo (Adria CMF) 8 mnths of that, and the lingering effects for so long after finishing that -- that's a way to spend the rest of your life. But then came Herceptin. I can do this. Now ev 3 wks (triple dose). It's a walk in the park. Many tests to keep on top of all body parts, annoying, but ev day I enjoy the heck out of it and spend much time thinking of being loving and grateful.

I sit around full of anger and bitterness is self-defeating. And sure I have my moments of fear and worry and feeling overwhelmed, but I scrabble back up the mountain and get my footing again, because I know that's what I must do to keep on keeping on.

I HAVE NEVER THOUGHT OF CHEMO AS "POISON". It is the best the med prof has to offer us today. One day it will be viewed as primitive, to be sure. But for now -- it is our lifeline. It pulls me through the rough waters. I hold my head high and endure the drug that is out to annihilate ev malig cell in my body. I try to help through "guided imagery" which some teach. Thoughts are energy. You are energy. Even the visions we have are energy. They are emitted by us and felt by others AND they are sensed by the Universe which responds by sending us LIKE ENERGY. It's some Cosmic Law, as sure as gravity. We couldn't see bacteria before the microscope but many believed they existed. And, besides, "thinking" loving, joyful, compassionate, grateful thoughts(for our suddenly visible multitude of blessings) -- if nothing else -- HOW WE WILL "FEEL" ALL DAY.

Please ladies, do not dwell on feeling embittered, victimized, forced to succumb to poisoning ourselves -- you will feel miserable as a result, at the very least. Don't do that to yourself, please! You deserve better than that. And maybe it counters in to a degree in healing (as they have found laughter and social contact do). Ever listen to a 100 yr old person explain why they think they've lived so long. They've mourned many at their age, but found their way back to happiness. They are full of laughter and humor.

When I had my (always dreaded) mastec, I began to oddly think -- when I put on a double breasted jacket, is it still double breasted? Can I still do the breast stroke in the pool? It was weird, but it made me laugh, in the face of my worst nightmare ever, losing a breast AND having ca AND having to have 8 mnths of chemo. I was shocked to find when I went for my 1st mammog that I was unilateral. I got a bargain rate. Oh, great. I thought of my reconst tram flap breast as a breast. True, made out of stomach parts, but they were my stomach parts. I came home and told Paul. I said does that mean if I get ca in my left breast, I'll have stomach ca? We both laughed. Keep smiling. Being in the 1% club doesn't make me better than anyone else. I want every one of you to join me! I'm doing my best to suggest ways to get there. UCLA (through Pegram and Slamon) did a 1 yr study of longterm Survivors -- to try and figure out what makes them diff. I had hrs long interviews 3 X over the yr. I filled out many pgs of questionnaires asking PSYCHOLOGICAL questions. Rating on a scale of 1 to 5 if most days you feel things like: sadness, fear, anger, etc. Then there were essays. And 3X a day swabs all 3 X throughout the yr -- to check your seratonin levels. Did you drink alcohol today? Do you smoke? What pills did you take and what dosages and why do you take them. My 2 doz supplements were listed, along w/my prescrip drgs. Did you exercise today? Is this typical, unusual, etc. Have you had caffeine today? In depth study. Looking for answers predominantly outside the lab, beyond genes. I was honored to take the time to participate. I want the 1% to be the 90 something club! I want YOU to join. Sending much love your way... ANDI