Doxil...q28 days -time is of the essence

[jml]

Hi Friends~
With all the sadness that we are all feeling with Christine's passing & the heartbreak her sweet daughters are enduring, I can't even bring myself to post the full details of my circumstances.
Suffice it to say that my scans last Thursday were not good. My NP called me on Friday morning & suggested we meet face to face - on her day off - to discuss the results.
Not good. Substantial progression in lungs from nodules to what looked like "a shot gun blast of disease" on both sides. So the SOB & rapid progression of symptoms - cough, constant need to clear throat - was due to the lung disease, not anemia as I thought/hoped.
They started me on an urgent dose of Doxil on Friday. I responded quickly & completely to Adria via chemoembo to my liver back in June 2010, so we are hoping with all hope that I will respond similarly to this sister drug.
I feel like I did have improved symptoms in the initial days, but now it's difficult to assess from day to day.
Since my symptoms progressed so quickly in the days right before scans, we'll know if I'm responding based on if my symptoms improve, or at the very least don't worsen. I'm holding on the great hope that the first dose has knocked back the disease and will hold until I'm able to get a 2nd, 3rd, 4th, etc. But honestly, right now I just hope to get through these next 21 days.
It's a scary time. And I am scared.
My mom is here with me and we are all waiting - with hope and with fear.
Suddenly a miraculous 11 year survival with MBC has accelerated into a matter or days/weeks.
I'm still at a loss trying to understand what is happening.

Trying trying trying to Keep the Faith~

Jessica

[lkc Gumby]

Hi Jessica, I am not on these boards very often, but I am always checking to see how you are doing. I am sorry to hear about the recent progression, but it certainly appears you are a fast responder, which is good. Please stay strong and keep the faith. I am praying that you will start feeling better and that these lung lesions are shrinking away.

[NEDenise]

Jessica,
Sending all the prayers, love and healing energy my soul can come up with. Please post news...good or bad...when you can.
Hope you can feel the love and support flowing out to you!
Denise

[Mary Anne in TX]

Jessica, please ask your mom to give you some extra hugs from all of us. I'm believing for fast powerful results that get you on the mend. Lots of love, ma

[StephN]

Jessica -
Sending gentle hugs and good thoughts for all the strength you need to continue on the Doxil as it reduces your tumors.

I am very glad we were able to meet in San Antonio a while back. It was great to finally meet your wonderful self in the flesh after all these years being sort of pen pals via this web site. We have been through a lot together.

[CoolBreeze]

A friend of mine is on Doxil and it has done very well by her. She's had some skin trouble from it though, like chemical burns. But it knocked her tumors right flat and I hope it does the same for you.

*hugs*

[Barbara H.]

Jessica,
My thoughts are with you. I hope the Doxil works for you and gives you more time. Enjoy each day as best as you can. I am glad your mom is with you for support.
Please continue to write when you can. You will be in my daily thoughts.
Barbara H.

[KsGal]

Im so sorry you are scared, and Im glad that your mother is able to be there with you and you can spend time with each other. Your story is going to continue to be miraculous. Your body and your mind and your faith have held this disease at bay for 11 years, and its not going to stop now. Your strength and courage are an inspiration to us all. Please keep us updated. Prayers and positive energy....

[Cat]

Jessica, I'm not a regular here but I'm sending thoughts and prayers that the doxil works. This disease sucks!
Hugs to you. Cathy

[ElaineM]

Hi,
I have my fingers crossed for you. Hang in there and keep putting one foot in front of the other no matter what happens.

[MaineRottweilers]

Jessica,
I am new here but I want you to know that I will be thinking of you and watching for you to let us know how you are doing. I am sorry that you are afraid but I am glad that you do not have to be alone and afraid. Hold tight to your family and keep your faith. You've won before, you can win again.

[Laurel]

Jessica,

Thank you for your honest and painfully candid post. I do not blame you one bit for feeling blindsided, rushed, and scared. The good news is Doxil is a mean-cancer-killing drug--hard on the recipient, but a formidable foe against cancer. I will pray it knocks the #*^% of those shotgun blast lung mets blasting them straight back to hell where they came from! Stay brave. We are praying.

[sassy]

Mega thoughts and prayers for you Jessica. Glad your mom is there with you to face the fear with your indomitable courage and strength.

[karen z]

Hi Jess,
So glad also that your mom is with you. It sounds like you are getting some powerful stuff and I am hoping that this will get you back on the right track soon. Take one day at a time and stay strong. If anyone can get through this and hang tough it is you gal.

[Paty]

Dear Jesica, I feel so bad for all the bad things you have to endure with this terrible illness. I am sending hugs to you hoping you respond to the drugs quickly. I am praying for you and for all the sisters here that are going through terrible moments. Hold God's hand and do not let it go. We love you very much.

[IrvineFriend]

Hi Jessica,

I'm sorry you're scared and it's great your Mom is there. I'm fairly new on here, and have loved your posts. The great thing is you respond to chemo. And your medical team seem very invested in you and are going to do everything they can.

This is all fairly new to me and I love your spirit and tenacity. I now do that "self talk" that Denise does. I don't know if you have done that, but it wouldn't hurt?

Thinking of you,

-Julie

[SusanN]

Dearest Jessica...I am in agreement with all these wonderful, encouraging, supportive and loving friends!!
I will be lifting you up in prayer for peace, strength and wisdom!!
Hugs!!

[Bunty]

Jessica, you are a survivor and you are much loved. These two factors will help you through this stage, plus all the love and prayers coming your way from all of us here and I'm sure a lot of other people who love you.
Please keep us posted.
Hugs, hugs, hugs
Marie

[Pamelamary]

Dear Jessica,
Positive thoughts coming your way from afar. You have withstood so much up till now, so I hope Doxil and your own strength prevail again.
Love.... Pam

[NEDenise]

Jess...
Just renewing my promise of prayers and love heading your way.
I know you're scared - who wouldn't be!?

But try to let your faith keep you strong!
Doxil sounds like a real ball-breaker!
So... Lean on God, your amazing Mom, your family, friends, medical team...and know that your HER2 sisters are here for you too!

Sending love and light to you, my friend...
Denise

[Vicky]

Jessica- adding my heartfelt thoughts and prayers with the others. Hopeful- and lifting you- praying for strength, clarity and peace.

[CarolineC]

Jessica,

Could some of the issue be fibrosis? You just had radiation 6 months ago.

You will continue to be miraculous and amazing and this treatment will work. Wish I could be there to give you a huge hug and give you strength. I'm glad you have your family with you.

['lizbeth]

Jessica,

Ugh. I wish that you had received better news.

My friend posted yesterday that "If God only gives us what we can handle, he must think I'm a real bad ass."

Well I think that you are really strong and courageous, spirited and tenacious.

I hope the Doxil kicks the cancer's butt and that even tho it is kicking your butt - that you will bounce back again even stronger.

[dawny]

Jessica
Adding my best wishes along with all of your friends here. I am sorry you are scared, let's hope the cancer is terrified, seeing doxil come its way!
Dawn xx

[jml]

Hi My Friends~
Thank you for your encouragement & prayers. I can feel them, I can!
We meet with in-home hospice tomorrow - not because I necessarily think we're
"at that point", but it is the option I have chosen and would like to know as much
about the program and what to expect.We leaned on the nurses so much when my dad was in hospice and I want my mom and sisters to have that support again.
I had a long, very honest conversation with my NP and I feel less disoriented about what to expect.
As I always say, Knowledge is Power.
I don't think it will necessarily make things easier, but it is somehow helpful.
I haven't given up!
My NP said it's too early to say whether the Doxil is working or not - and I'll have some good days and some bad days, and I have to remember that I am still anemic and all the SE's of chemo are still in play. It's confusing though, bc when I feel well, I think it's working. When I don't feel well I'm scared that it's not.

I am keeping the Faith my friends~

Jessica

[karen z]

Thanks for posting again Jessica.
It makes sense that you would want to have as much support as possible for yourself as well as for your mom and sis. I am glad that you had a good talk with your NP and that it helped you get centered. Please let me know if there is anything you need or I can do to help out. I am not far away!
Love,
K