Pain? yes Appt? yes Relief? ????

[NEDenise]

Friends,
I feel like all I ever do is ask you to pray for my feeble body and spirit. Please bear with me again...

In about an hour, my wonderful sister is coming to take me on what promises to me a very uncomfortable ride into the city to see the specialist for my ruined back. The IV narcotics and steroids have all run their course, and I'm worried about just how painful this 45 minute trip could be.

Then, I'm worried that once I'm there, they're going to send me back home until they can fit me on the OR
schedule next week. That would mean, not only a painful trip home today...but new adventures in pain when they tell me they can fit me in and fix me up next week. I asked...my insurance will not pay for an ambulance to transport me (preferably unconscious).

As a cancer survivor myself, I know I should be embarrassed for whining about this, but friends...this pain hurts more that I ever could have imagined anything hurting. ANYTHING.

Please pray for me.
Relief from some of the pain...
relief from some of the stress...
courage...and perhaps most of all...
a quick return of the "can-do", peaceful feeling that keeps me going day to day.

Satan's spawn (aka HR director) has been trying hard to steal that peace from me...
and I need strength to fight that feeling of despair off, before it takes hold.
To fight off cancer and lose to that "beast" would be embarrassing beyond endurance. I would never be able to face my loved ones on the "other side" someday, if I gave into that whole mess!

Thanks for your love and prayers my friends! I'll let you know how today goes.
Denise

[hestko76]

I'm praying now for a pain free transport.... Make the Good Lord surround you today and always.

[ammebarb]

Praying, Denise.

[GracePang]

Praying for you. The more you relaxed, the less pain. I know its easier to say, harder to do. you could try at least

[starwishn2]

Dear Denise... I will be praying all day for you. I've suffered with back pain and issues off and on for years. Sadly, your struggle sounds incredibly painful. :( You certainly deserve pain free days along with peace from dealing with Satan's spawn. You are in my thoughts!!

Jeri

[caya]

Sending prayers from the Great White North to you dear Denise...

I hope and pray they can fit you in for surgery ASAP on compassionate grounds.

all the best
caya

[BonnieR]

What I hear throughout your message is so out of character for you: fear, defeat, pessimism and I know that is pain talking. It can wear you down like nothing else. So just remember that what you are feeling is the result of outside forces.
Maybe the pain won't be as you anticipate it, maybe things will go smoothly. That's how our Denise would tackle it
I remember being told about a practice in Mindfulness Meditation. It seems counterintuitive but here goes: when in pain, go with it, ride it. I know it sounds very Zen and to be avoided but it somehow works. I don't pretend to be able to appreciate how you feel right now but am just offering thoughts
Can you at least take something for anxiety? Ativan?
In future, if you can't have an ambulance, would some sort of medical transport be available? I don't know that they would be any better than ones own family but maybe they have more comfortable seats?
Mostly I just want to say that I hear your frustration. It can be exhausting keeping up good spirits in the face of such circumstances. But it is all temporary. It won't always be like this . You are a survivor if I've ever seen one. Take it a day at a time and keep the faith

[StephN]

Dear Denise -
Praying hard for your ride and appointment outcome.
Hope they gave you something strong for that pain! Otherwise the surgeon can prescribe it. You have to have a paper copy for that since it is a narcotic, no over the phone refills.

I came out of the hospital with some Oxycodone for my back pain. I dosed for the rides into the hospital, which took around 40 minutes. Then I had another pill when I got back home and into my bed.

Hang in there, and as Bonnie said, try to keep that pain from talking. As excruciating as it is, it WILL get better.

[Redwolf8812]

Prayer going up. God listens to us sinners!

[roz123]

praying for you Denise....back pain is horrible (I literally feel your pain)

[LoisLane]

Denise please never stop asking us for support, you are always there for all of us in your wonderful posts. I will pray that you get relief from this terrible pain but when you get to that surgeon you get the most powerful pain relief they can give you. I really hope they get you into surgery ASAP thinking of you Denise. Lois

[Rolepaul]

So if you break your leg, they transport you in the ambulance, but not if you break your back! Unreal. Let me know the school district and maybe get an investigative reporter to talk to the Devil's Daughter. I am buried in alligators or I would go myself.

[KsGal]

Oh Denise....Im so sad and upset to hear you are in so much pain. As mentioned, please don't ever quit asking for the prayers and support when you need them. I'll light a candle for you, and Im thinking about you today. Lots of prayers, gentle hugs.

[chrisy]

denise, I know your adventure today has already begun, and maybe is even over. Still, prayers are never wasted so I prayerfully give thanks for all the good guidance you have gotten from your bros and sisters above, and ask for you to be showered with all the additional grace you need to get through this.

Never apologize about asking for prayers, we want to hear and so does God.

As for Satan's spawn. I call upon greater, far more powerful angels to be brought to bear, to weaken her and shield you from her. Angels can take many forms...

Denise, don't forget to breathe.

Love,
Chris

[chekmark]

Dennis,
When I had my herniated disk I would scream out with pain. My husband would set the alarm 2 hours before I needed to be up so I could take a pain pill to get out of bed to get ready for work. Most excruciating thing ever. If I didn't move I was ok but how do you avoid moving? Maybe try to position yourself in the back seat some how so u have more availability to move or stretch. Now getting out of the car is another topic. I will tell you that after surgery I was pain free and walking the halls immediately if that is of any comfort to u. We all react differently and I pray that is the case with you. U can do this I know u can. I am surprised that they haven't already done your surgery with the pain level you are having. U have tackled so much and won, this is just temporary. I feel your frustration, enough is enough but let's get that back feeling better SOON! Are they doing a fusion or micro discectomy? U r always in my prayers. Scream in a pillow if it helps, you are allowed to be fed up. Lets hope this is your last hurdle. Keep us posted.

[chekmark]

Oops, just reread your post and you already should have done your travel. I meant well. Sorry I am late. Hope it went well.

[dawny]

Hope all went well today Denise
Dawn

[ammebarb]

Thinking of you often, and hoping that they may have just been able to keep you to do your surgery. Prayers, prayers, and more prayers.

Barb A.

[valleygirl]

Sending prayers up!!

Denise

[NEDenise]

Friends,
First...I love you!! <3

Second...surgery is scheduled for tomorrow morning. Gee, that means for my Aussie friends, I'm done, fine, and eating celebratory chocolate already. That was easy.

I'm hoping my experience is like yours Darlene, and I dance out of here on Saturday!

Everybody who was worried about my spirits slipping...fear not...they've "un-slipped". Pain management is a beautiful thing!!

I'll keep you posted as things progress. Keep praying!
Love,
Denise

[Bunty]

You cannot keep a good woman down!! Hope all goes amazingly well for the surgery Denise.
Thinking of you, and sending you a big pain-free hug!
Cheers Marie

[Jackie07]

Will be thinking of/praying for you tomorrow. Be aware that the pain threshhold (after the surgery - in the recovery room)might be different this time.

[starwishn2]

Praying that surgery is a total success and that you have a quick recovery. Those chocolates will taste so good!

Let us know how it goes~
Jeri

[StephN]

Happy to know your pain is now MANAGED!

And your surgery will be over by the time I am having my breakie tomorrow morning.

My very best wishes coming your way for a skilled surgeon with a steady hand to do the amazing work to bring you back to a normal life.

(Mine is not yet quite normal, but gets better as time goes by!)

[Paula O]

Denise,
I'm glad to hear that God answered our prayers to get you the help you needed with the surgery scheduled quickly. I hope you feel much better real soon.
Paula

[jra40]

Praying that your surgery went well and you will soon be pain free!

[KsGal]

Today is the day! Im sending lots of positive thoughts and prayers. Im so happy they got you scheduled so quickly, and you will be on the road to recovery. Also, so thankful they got your pain under control, and you are not suffering with that anymore. Yay! :)

[ammebarb]

Good morning, Denise. Lots and lots of prayers have been sent. Hope you are feeling better and will soon be on your feet and feeling fiesty! A friend told me that his post surgical pain was so much less than what he had experienced before the operation, that it was downright strange.....Hope the same is true for you, and you will soon be resting and recuperating at home. Gentle hugs.

Barb A.

[IrvineFriend]

Denise, by time you get this you'll be out of surgery and on your way to healing! I'm sure you'll have the relief that Barb described above. Looking forward to having someone to play scrabble with again soon!

-Julie

[sassy]

Denise,
Hope all went well and you are on the road to recovery!

Prayers still going!

[Pray]

Praying ever so hard that you are able to post soon with a positive attitude and out come. Gods blessings are all around you. Peace my friend

[Joanne S]

Denise, Oh I'm sorry to hear that. :( I've been there and my husband has too (he had to have 3 vertabrae fushed together). Damn- I know the suffering from back pain can be so unbelievably unbearable. My heart goes out to you. I hope and pray for prompt pain relief for you and that they are able to help resolve your pain!!! Denise, Please let's us know how it went.

Thank You My Dear Loving God, I pray in your name Jesus Christ. Please hear my prayer. Please have mercy and lay your healing hands on our sister Denise. I pray for your mercy of those sick, suffering with mind and body pain and all of us here stricken with cancer, and I pray for peace in this world and your miracles! Amen!

[dawny]

How are you going Denise? Thinking about you
Dawn

[NEDenise]

Hello Friends!
I'm feeling much, MUCH better today!
The surgery was on Thursday...pushed a day earlier because of the pain levels, that drugs were barely touching. Intractable pain is what they called it.

From the time I arrive at the hospital on Wednesday, until the surgery was complete on Thursday, I was treated like a queen...a drugged up queen, in a lot of pain, but a queen, just the same.

Then...and those of you who have known me for a while will not be at all surprised by what happened next.
I came out of anesthesia,
intubation tube was removed,
I was wheeled into recovery...
was spoken to briefly by someone who was clearly not old enough to shave but who was expert enough in the practice of neurosurgery, to decide if I was going to be okay.

This fine young man said everything went fine. He told the "workers" in post-op that I could return to my room, and that I could have ice or juice whenever I wanted it.

Good deal, right?! That was at 5:17. One of the post-op minions gave me a tiny medicine cup - smaller than a shot glass - with exactly 4 pea sized pieces of ice in it.

They parked me by the door to the soiled laundry room - no, you didn't read that wrong - and no one came back to check on me until I heard someone say it was 6:50, and they were going to order their pizza for dinner. They were having trouble deciding between pepperoni and sausage. I hadn't eaten a thing in 18 hours at that point...and the 4 tiny chip of ice were a distant memory.

I asked someone for more ice or some water - at this point, my teeth were actually stuck to my lips, and talking was painful. "You're next, we're waiting for transport to come get you." I could really use a drink, I replied, my mouth and tongue are sore.

"You're fine", she said, "you still have most of a bag of fluid hanging."

It was then that I looked at my arm and noticed that while there was an IV line in my arm...there waddn't shit running into it!
No fluid...because I've been battleing low blood pressure,
no antibiotics for the bladder infection,
and NO, I repeat, NO PAIN meds at all.
It had been 2 hours since my 3 hour spinal surgery and I had yet to get any pain medicine.

I looked around the room, and realized that except for the staff members trying to decide what to order from Pizza Hut I was the only one there...
clearly they were NOT rushed off their feet!

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, it was then that something inside me snapped. Even with all the untreated pain I was feeling...
I sat bolt upright and announced in a rather determined tone of voice:

Excuse me everyone, I think I've gained just about all I can from my view of the soiled laundry room. It would probably be best if one of you would find me a wheelchair, so I can transport myself to my hospital room. I'll just be removing these IVs and monitors while you work on that.


Sadly, it was then that one of those post-op worker bees set down her 32 ounce Pepsi...with LOTs of ice in it, to come running to stop the lunatic patient (That would have been me in her view)

My state of extreme dehydration, coupled with that beautiful sloshing ice sound was a very bad combo.

Then, not knowing with whom they were dealing...they all adopted what I'm sure were intended to be calming tones, but telling me to stay calm when I am perfectly justified in my fury...OH MAN!!

Fortunately for their bodies, and for my perfectly clean criminal record, I was too weak to do much more that say loud things about my perceived mistreatment at their hands.

Then, my whole body started to shake, and I realized, I was crying, but I was too dehydrated for tears to form.

I don't remember who finally got me to lay down and wheeled me back to my room - she was dressed in OR garb not Post op. What I do know is that the nurses, CNAs Food service staff, maintenance, PT, OT on my floor...all checked in on me several time over the next day or two. "How could anyone treat their Denise" that way! Very sweet! (Boy does a good story travel through a hospital in a hurry!)

And the neurosurgeon, when he came to see me about my "entire experience" - that's how they always ask here...YIKES!

What they want to hear is something like"seamless", "couldn't have been better", "your team is certainly top notch".

Clearly, that was not the case. I didn't have the names of any of the people who were slackers and caused the problem...he says he can easily track that down himself...but I did make a point of telling him the names of every person who took exceptional care of me...because there have been many.

If you didn't laugh when you read this because you were feeling bad for me...go back and read it with the knowledge that it all turned out fine, and the part where I tell them to get me a wheelchair cause the IVs are comin' out...I wish I had video of those faces when they realized just how much trouble their poor treatment of me could end up causing. I bet they didn't enjoy that pizza as much as they thought they would!! :)

Thanks for checking in on me!
Still having pain, but nothing like I had before the surgery. And...I'm pretty sure I get to go home tomorrow!
Love to all of you!
Denise

[dawny]

Oh Denise!!!!

What a day! Yes, I was feeling bad for you, but you are right, everything turned out well, so ll you can do is laugh! Fancy leaving you with a view of the laundry room, with no medication, or water for hours, whilst they debate their pizza toppings! WTH?

You are a funny lady, Denise, you always have a goo d story to tell. I'm so glad you are feeling ok, and will be home soon. If you can get out the hospital now that is, they may be trying to make up for it now, keeping you in with extra special care!
Take it easy my friend x

[Redwolf8812]

Oh, man. Was this at UPenn? I'm so disappointed in them. Disgraceful.

[StephN]

I CAN NOT BELIEVE THAT! The hospital staff is NEVER supposed to leave a just-recovered-from-surgery patient unattended!

Having had the same recent surgery, I am shocked! That staff was completely negligent, and it is not one bit funny. You were starting to have complications and needed attention. They should have never taken you out of recovery until you were either going home or directly to a room.

I can't stop shaking my head ...

You were right to give the riot act to the physician. That place could be in big trouble.

On a brighter note, I am so glad you are feeling better and in much LESS pain.

[Jackie07]

O Denise, that was aweful! I'm so sorry about your odeal.

Thought my experience after hysterectomy/oophorectomy three years ago was bad enough (terrible pain in the recovery room because my tolerance of pain medicine and then late at night a staff attempted to put the blood pressure cuff on my right arm where 11 lymphnodes had been out and I'd experienced lymphedema!)

Those staff must have thought you were still under the influence of Anesthetics and they could just sneak off... [A nurse had told me some personal stuff during my rehabilitation after the brain (tumor) surgery in 1990. When I mentioned it (asked about her 'Oriental' daughter-in-law) a year later at the 'reunion', she turned to my husband and said: "You watch her! She doesn't forget anything!"]

I also had been left alone by a young 'boy' (probably a high school student volunteer) after he had pushed my wheelchair to the 'wrong' station unattended. Susan, my PT, 'fetched' me about five minutes later. From her pale face I realized what a big deal it must have been for them to have a patient 'missing'...

But the IV part was inexcusable...

[twosenuf99]

Denise,

So sorry for all the mistreatment you had to endure. Very glad you are feeling better and on the road to recovery.

[Lien]

Hi Denise,

So good to hear your pain is under control. I saw your message too late to suggest finding a friend with an RV, who can transport you in a horizontal position.

I once pulled a muscle in the mountains in Switzerland which developed into an infection. Until then, I'd never ever felt such excruciating pain (I learnt that childbirth can be worse, since, but that's another story). My boyfriend and I had a van, and he put a mattress in it & drove me back to the Netherlands (900 Miles, the first 150 through the mountains). I think if I had known in advance how painful that would be, I'd have screamed for euthanasia.

You are a real trooper to have done the 45 minute trip without killing your sister or the doctor or both.

Love

Jacqueline

[ammebarb]

Oh Denise, I'm glad you can recall your experience with some humor, but what a rough post-op time. They SHOULD have treated you like a princess after that. I'm glad your pain is better and hope that now it just gets less and less and less each day, until you are on your feet and pain free! You have been so much on my mind and in my prayers, Denise. Did you get to go home today? Sending gentle cyber hugs and the hope that you have access to lots of ice or cold beverage of your choice!

Barb A.

[chekmark]

So proud of you for speaking up. Not to mention your family was probably waiting to see you and the germs that were probably in that laundry room. So glad your pain is better. Hope u r home and resting comfortably now. Now lets try to stay out of the hospital, lol. I chuckled at your post and also was angry that they left you hanging like that. Take care my friend.

[Mandamoo]

I love that you always find a way to smile and laugh. I hope your recovery is speedy and pain free.
amanda

[NanaJoni]

Denise - glad it turned out well in the end but sorry for you having to rattle their cages. You could always just say (in a most innocent and sweet way) - "my friend who's an attorney said, gosh, that sounds like medical malpractice"......it's fun to watch their faces and see what good care you get then. Hope you got to go home to recover completely and pain-freely.

[mamacze]

Oh golly, I hate when I am away for a few days and miss a beat; and this event for you Denise was a huge beat. I was overwhelmed with sad when I read your first post about intractable pain - and horrified by your catch 22 options. Prayed under my breath all the way to the post op events and even more aghast at the treatment at UPenn. Still shaking my head. BUT you roll in with maybe a happy ending? Please tell us your pain is gone????
XOXO
Kim (from CT)

[Pray]

Denise, I'm so glad you are finally on the mend! You sure are a great writer! Have you started your book yet?

[KsGal]

Holy cow!!!! The way you write it is funny, but if I had been there I would have been fuming!!!! Not one of those people discussing pizza could go ahead and take you to your room???? Im surprised you didn't jump up, kick her in the shin, and start sucking her pop down the straw. ACK! What a rude, uneducated bunch of people..Im sorry.
Having said that, I am so very happy that the procedure went well, that you are in less pain, and that you are now on the recovery route. Big hugs to you, and I sure hope you are sitting pretty at home soon.

[BonnieR]

Oh Denise, what a bad experience. And potentially harmful. To you, not them! Although it sounds like they were heading for a thrashing from you!
Sadly I expect most of us have had similar experiences where we are treated as though we are not even there. I remember once being left on a stretcher in an empty corridor for ages. I felt so helpless and powerless. No one around to hear me call out. Once a pre-op room with blaring talk radio and staff laughing and talking while patients anxiously awaited surgery
The list goes on. A litany of small indignities that add to our feeling of vulnerability We become invisible to staff. They forget we can hear every word. Even dying we can hear every word. It's the last sense to go
This isn't life threading but once during a dental cleaning the hygienist said to me "I'm tired of you jumping so much" I told her I was tired of her causing me to jump so much!!!! How dare she blame the patient for the discomfort she caused!
Looks like you hit a nerve on me Denise( pun not intended!). Sorry for the rant but I feel very strongly about this. I think we all do now that we are in Cancerland and exposed to so many medical "professionals" with our life in their hands
Keep the faith

[ElaineM]

I am glad you are on your way to recovery. Heal well.

[NEDenise]

You guys are the best medicine in the world!
(Well, the best one that doesn't directly kick HER2 BC's a$$!)

I am so happy to be home! Sleeping in my own bed. Eating what I want, when I want. Cuddling my children, my husband and my dogs as much as they'll tolerate.

And, it's much, much better to be able to decide if I need pain medicine, and then to be able to decide which ones and how much. I hated having to take what the all-powerful pharmacy computer said I needed, or else have to wait for the next time it was due (sometimes several hours later). Plus, and this will shock you, I'm sure, I'm a bit of a control freak. I know, you'd never have guessed...but I like to be in charge of my own stuff.

So...the pain is still there. Not anywhere near what I was feeling before surgery...not even in the same league. You know how they ask you to assign a number to your pain? Before surgery, and I'm not exaggerating here, before surgery, the lowest number we were able to get to was 6 - and then only briefly. Most of that week was spent hovering in the crazy place between 8 and 9 - it makes me cringe just to think about it. So, let's not!

After the surgeon worked his magic (and some clever person reattached the pain med IV) I only hit 7 once.
And since then I haven't been above 4...
I can report happily to you that right now I am smiling, resting comfortably while I check in with all of you, and am at pain level 2...
mostly because of all the staples that are keeping everything closed up nice and tight. :)

The highlight of my evening (get the big L for my forehead ready) is going to be a shower...in my own bathroom, using my own soap, shampoo, and conditioner. mmmm

Then, using my own gel, and smoothing mousse, hairdryer, and curling iron...I will, for the first time in 2 weeks have a hair-do that looks like me. Heck! If I still have enough stamina left, I may even put on a little eyeliner and lipstick. aaahhhh

Then, just because I can,
I will use my own favorite lotions and perfumes,
dress myself in a nightgown that has never, ever, been worn by another living soul...
and which is not brutally, painfully ugly,
and sit curled on my couch to watch something so funny that all the laughing makes my stitches ache.

Naturally, with my current level of energy...this evening will be for me...what swimming kilometers in the ocean is to our beautiful Amanda! I may only be able to accomplish part of my goal...but tomorrow is another day!

Love and hugs to all!
Denise

[Soccermom]

Denise, I thought this webinar might be of interest to you..."Cancer in the Workplace" sponsored by the YSC. Thursday Jan 31 7:30-8:30 EST

For more info...
https://www1.gotomeeting.com/register/740114832

[Pamelamary]

Denise, I hope your evening was as good as it sounds in your description - and may there be many more such indulgences! Excellent medicine......
Best wishes..... Pam

[ammebarb]

Thinking of you again, Miss Denise and hoping that the pain level is even lower than a two by now. Your plan to laugh until your stitches ache really inspires me....I called my Dr. and she has called in a prescrip for an antidepressant. The sensible advice my HER2 warriors gave helped me to make the decision to call. Maybe I will be able to laugh sometime soon too!

Zinging hugs across the state at you too!

Barb A.

[mamacze]

There is nothing like a curling iron, lipstick, our OWN nightgown and laughing at the TV that does a better job of shouting I AM ON THE MEND!! You go girl! Stretch out those toes and enjoy being home. It doesn't get much better than this. Your update made my whole day.
Hugs and Hugs,
Kim (from CT)

[NanaJoni]

Denise - you are the best medicine. And you deserve all the wonderful things you described in your post last night. I hope and pray it was as wonderful as it sounded.

[BonnieR]

I hope you're eating chocolate too!
Keep the faith!

[kk1]

Denise

Your plan for the night made me smile, made me laugh. I have so been there at times, oh the true joy of the 4s and m (shit,shower,shave, silky sleepware, and mascara ). Throw in a family cuddle and you know your on the upside!

[rhondalea]

To be honest, I'm a little relieved that I was able to read this all the way through rather than waiting on the edge of my seat to see how it would all turn out. (Thank you, Microsoft.) I am agape at what you've just been through, but I'm surely glad it's over. And I hope it means that there will be no more mishaps, and your recovery will proceed apace.

You have had a very difficult couple of years, but what makes it amazing is the grace and humor with which you've handled it all. I'm in awe.

Heal quickly.

[NEDenise]

You guys make MY day...with some regularity!
You make me feel like what I'm thinking and feeling is important.
And the BEST feeling comes from when one of you says something I said or did made a difference for you. Wow!

I gotta tell you, sometimes when I'm sitting around, waiting for my malady du jour to resolve...and I'm starting to feel a little discouraged, even verging on sad...I actually sometimes find myself fondly remembering when cancer was all I had to keep track of and fight off.

Then...I pop in here, and one of you says exactly what I need to hear...not even knowing I need it...and my fighting spirit is renewed. I'm ready to take on whatever comes. I can see the funny side of my ridiculous situation, and I feel like I can handle whatever life throws at me.

I guess it boils down to the fact that I admire so many of you, so much...that your opinions mean more to me than I would ever have imagined. I think some of you even know me well enough by now, that you see the sadness seeping in before I do sometimes.

Anyway...bottom line...THANK YOU FOR YOUR LOVE AND SUPPORT!!

Now, on to the pampering. It took a LOT longer than I thought it would. It went something like this:
Shower
Toothbrushing
Rest :)
Dress
Nap :)
Re-wet hair
Blow dry
Rest :)
Make-up
Nap :)

So, what would normally take like maybe 30-40 minutes...took about 5-6 hours. But I felt like a new woman! A cleaner prettier, healthier woman!!

And, instead of TV, we ordered Chinese and played games. OMG did my muscles hurt from laughing. My little family could be a sit-com. Everyone goofs on everyone and everything. And the laughing sometimes gets to be the kind where you can't catch your breath. I'm pretty sure that's more core exercise than any PT would have me doing at this point!

Yesterday wore me out so much, it's only 11 am and I'm contemplating a nap!

Thanks for checking in on me friends!
Love and big hugs to all of you!
Denise
PS-Barb, I hope your Rx is exactly what you need! You, my friend, deserve every bit of joy life has to offer!

[LoisLane]

Hey Denise you make MY day! You always make me smile. Hugs and lots of love to you. Lois

[carlatte7]

Oh, my goodness....in spite of the fact that alls well that ends well- that whole thing is inexcusable. It makes me ashamed to be part of the medical profession. I sincerely hope that they shape up and you are soon outta there running amock and spreading sunshine and sparkles. Keeping you in my prayers.

[NEDenise]

Well...just a quick update...
I've been called by two different managers/quality control people from the hospital. My main concern was that it was not something that happened often and that it NEVER happen to anyone else again - my mind kept flashing to images of someone's elderly parent or grandparent lying there like I was. Someone who perhaps does not have the high expectations and somewhat outspoken manner with which I have been blessed ;)

They assured me this was an anomaly and that heads will roll. So, like Carlatte said - all's well that ends well! :)

Feeling better each day - staples come out Monday at 9! Yay! Right now I feel a little like a box, wrapped by an overzealous UPS trainee with a staple gun. :) My doc conservatively estimated that there are 30-40 staples in a 4-5 inch space along my spine. Overkill? I wonder.

Keep those healing prayers coming when you can...I'm hoping that if I can get back to work by mid Feb, Satan's Spawn (HR director) won't give my classroom away and turn me into a sub for the remainder of the year. That would make me sooooo sad...and you know I don't like sad!

You're all in my prayers, some by name, with specific prayer requests attached
(like Barb's eyes, and Tricia's Birthday...
Leah's new giving back project,
and Amanda and Chris's fight to find that new magic combo...
and many, many more),
but all of you are lifted in prayer, as my beloved HER2 sisters...often. Good thing God is patient, and never says, "Enough already, Denise! I heard you the first 100 times sweetheart...trust me...I'm on it!"

Hope you're all having a great weekend!
Big Hugs all around!
Denise

[tricia keegan]

Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers Denise ((((hugs)))) sorry I'm late coming in! xx

[BonnieR]

Denise, your concern is something that I was thinking about when I was left in a corridor. At the same time an elderly woman was brought in and I overheard that she had no family or friends. I recall being so worried for her because, in the long run, I ( like you) would speak up for myself and had a support system. She was alone in the world on a stretcher.
I still think about her many years later Maybe I fear that it could be me someday......

[KsGal]

The description of your evening, getting all pretty and eating chinese and playing games with your family, make me tear up. Im just so happy that you are home and feeling better and able to enjoy something like that, and they were able to have that with you as well. I normally try to stay very positive, but it's really difficult sometimes to see our sisters being so brave and suffering so much. Im not meaning to be a "Debbie Downer", Im just saying sometimes it makes me flat out angry how unfair things are.
So when I get to log in and see posts like yours, it sure makes my whole day. Continuing to send up lots of prayers for your continued recovery and positive results in your work situation. Hugs!

[NEDenise]

Bonnie,
If God spares me till that day...you will NEVER be that old lady, alone, with noone to speak up for her. Arizona and Pennsylvania are a short plane flight away. You've been there for me, probably more times than you even realize...said just the thing I needed to hear (and sometimes you weren't even talking to me at the time). Just name the day and the time! No kidding!
With love,
Denise

[StephN]

Oh, MY! A 4 or 5 inch incision. Mine was about one inch, but then I had only the one disk to clean up. And no staples for me, so the healing was a breeze.

I imagine you have done the ice and heat routine, and brought home some antibiotics with you. Even if you will need a walker to go back to your classroom, I hope your doctor will permit it. That would be a GREAT Valentine for you and your students!

That is my prayer for you!

[NEDenise]

Staples out!
Exercise starts tomorrow!
:) Denise

[NanaJoni]

Hooray! You are on the mend. Now my old "Nana" reflex kicks in and I feel compelled to say: Take it easy at first and don't overdo.

[ammebarb]

Yes! I imagine you are a bit more comfortable with those staples out. You are going to do just exactly what they tell you to do about exercise, right? (I'm a Nana like Joni!) Here's hoping for a great recuperation, Denise. You are in my prayers every night.

I've started the antidepressant and am dealing with some side effects, which I expected. Hoping they don't last long and the med actually kicks in sooner rather than later. I really appreciated your feedback on the issue....guess I needed to hear that they really can make a difference.

Gentle hugs, dear Denise.

Barb A

[Soccermom]

Denise, thought maybe you'd be interested in these upcoming teleconferences sponsored by Genentech & Cancer and Careers. Here's the link to the schedule and sign up.

Hope you're feeling a bit better every day!

https://www.etouches.com/ereg/newreg.php?eventid=54704&


Marcia

[Becky]

Wow Denise. What a run of it you've had. I was off the board for awhile (on vacation and then a business trip) and yesterday my mom got a total knee replacement. So, I understand your post op experience. They couldn't get a bed for her for 9 hrs and I could only go back there with her for 5 minutes every hour but they did treat her and the other 3 stragglers waiting for beds very well (we were at Robert Wood Johnson University Hospital in New Brunswick, NJ). I am shocked and dismayed by UPenn as I live in Stockton, NJ and its also close to me. But, you are up and running. I'm glad I didn't get to read your story until today (the day after the knee replacement) or I would have been freaking out that my mom (an 80 yr old who would probably just lay there) was suffering. But the staff loved her and her stories of yesteryear. Whew. Thank goodness all is well with you.

[LeahM]

Wow, how did I miss the ending of this story for so long?? Denise, you have been on my mind, and in my prayers, daily. I had a similar experience post BMX and someday I hope to sit with you, having a cuppa something (wine perhaps) and tell you about it...or not tell you about it...I'd rather play Scrabble...

....anyway...while you are on the mend...I am here and I could be "there" in under an hour...let me know if you woud like some company!

Love YOU
Leah