Joy Column

[Jackie07]

~ A Baby's Hug ~

We were the only family with children in the restaurant. I sat Erik in a high chair and noticed everyone was quietly sitting and talking. Suddenly, Erik squealed with glee and said, 'Hi.' He pounded his fat baby hands on the high chair tray. His eyes were crinkled in laughter and his mouth was bared in a toothless grin, as he wriggled and giggled with merriment.

I looked around and saw the source of his merriment. It was a man whose pants were baggy with a zipper at half-mast and his toes poked out of would-be shoes. His shirt was dirty and his hair was uncombed and unwashed. His whiskers were too short to be called a beard and his nose was so varicose it looked like a road map.


We were too far from him to smell, but I was sure he smelled.. His hands waved and flapped on loose wrists. 'Hi there, baby; hi there, big boy. I see ya, buster,' the man said to Erik.

My husband and I exchanged looks,
'What do we do?'

Erik continued to laugh and answer, 'Hi.'

Everyone in the restaurant noticed and looked at us and then at the man. The old geezer was creating a nuisance with my beautiful baby. Our meal came and the man began shouting from across the room, 'Do ya patty cake? Do you know peek-a-boo? Hey, look, he knows peek- a-boo.'


Nobody thought the old man was cute.. He was obviously drunk.


My husband and I were embarrassed. We ate in silence; all except for Erik, who was running through his repertoire for the admiring skid-row bum, who in turn, reciprocated with his cute comments.


We finally got through the meal and headed for the door. My husband went to pay the check and told me to meet him in the parking lot. The old man sat poised between me and the door. 'Lord, just let me out of here before he speaks to me or Erik,' I prayed. As I drew closer to the man, I turned my back trying to sidestep him and avoid any air he might be breathing. As I did, Erik leaned over my arm, reaching with both arms in a baby's 'pick-me-up' position. Before I could stop him, Erik had propelled himself from my arms to the man.

Suddenly a very old smelly man and a very young baby consummated their love and kinship. Erik in an act of total trust, love, and submission laid his tiny head upon the man's ragged shoulder.. The man's eyes closed, and I saw tears hover beneath his lashes. His aged hands full of grime, pain, and hard labor, cradled my baby's bottom and stroked his back. No two beings have ever loved so deeply for so short a time.
I stood awestruck. The old man rocked and cradled Erik in his arms and his eyes opened and set squarely on mine. He said in a firm commanding voice, 'You take care of this baby.'


Somehow I managed, 'I will,' from a throat that contained a stone.


He pried Erik from his chest, lovingly and longingly, as though he were in pain.. I received my baby, and the man said, 'God bless you, ma'am, you've given me my Christmas gift.'


I said nothing more than a muttered thanks. With Erik in my arms, I ran for the car. My husband was wondering why I was crying and holding Erik so tightly, and why I was saying, 'My God, my God, forgive me.'


I had just witnessed Christ's love shown through the innocence of a tiny child who saw no sin, who made no judgment; a child who saw a soul, and a mother who saw a suit of clothes. I was a Christian who was blind, holding a child who was not. I felt it was God asking, 'Are you willing to share your son for a moment?' when He shared His for all eternity. How did God feel when he put his baby in our arms 2000 years ago.

The ragged old man, unwittingly, had reminded me, 'To enter the Kingdom of God , we must become as little children.'

If this has blessed you, please bless others by sending it on. Sometimes, it takes a child to remind us of what is really important. We must always remember who we are, where we came from and, most importantly, how we feel about others. The clothes on your back or the car that you drive or the house that you live in does not define you at all; it is how you treat your fellow man that identifies who you are.


This one is a keeper.

'It is better to be liked for the true you, than to be loved for who people think you are......'

[PetuniaJan]

Beautiful Story !!!
Thank you for telling it
Happy Easter
Have a great day!
Love Jan

[fauxgypsy]

This has nothing to do with cancer. It has everything to do with dreams. I am still crying after watching it twice. I hope it moves you as it did me. Wow.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9lp0IWv8QZY

[StephN]

Thanks a lot for that.
Two things come to mind.

1. Never judge a book by its cover.

2. Singing in the village church CAN pay off!

[Believe51]

Today's Joy: Being reunited with my family here. Man o' man did I miss you all!!>>Believe51

[Jackie07]

Yeah, an alumna of my college choir e-mailed me the link of Susan Boyle. It was indeed inspirational. True talent
can not be hidden. And she's so cheerful and humble.
I think everyone of us need to treasure our own talent and shine on our own stage just like she did...

And welcome back, Believe 51, you are such an important part of this family.

[Believe51]

Today's Joy: Looking at my high school yearbook this morning and smiling. It is funny how I thought I changed so much into this adult that now exists. Flipping through the pages and reading the responses really made me know that I had the makings. You could see the foundations of this woman we call Believe51. One of the interesting things I read over and over in all replies was that my smile and positive attiude was so powerful and important to them....that this would get me by any dark days. My life has never been an easy one but I see now that attitude is everything for me and that I have lived through some very dark days. I am glad to be me and to have been able to see this much life. I wish to live to be an old bitty.>>Believe51

[Believe51]

Today's Joy: Five weeks in the hospital and now in a rehab center, my Mother-in-Law is coming along fine. She still has ongoing issues that need tending to, one being the solid foods she eats go directly in her lungs. When visiting her she told me she changed and it is apparent to us all; she realizes she needs help and has accepted that now. My reply to her was that it only took a coma to straighten her out (smiling). I am so happy and between Ed, a close family friend and myself, we handled things at home great. This news makes me feel like I am floating on a cloud.>>Believe51

[Believe51]

Today's Joy: My Mother-in-Law is now in a rehab center, alive and well and amazing us all. Things are progressing rather perfectly for her and that makes my life so much easier. She still has other health issues to tend to when she gets home, one of them being solid foods go directly into the lungs. I visited with her for many hours and had a ball with her, she is like an old friend and I thank God that we did not lose her. She sat there in bed putting pin curls in, yes...she was curling her hair can you believe it? We talked and she had mentioned to me that 'she changed' and this is a big accomplishment for her. She has realized she needs help and has fully accepted this fact. I laughed as I told her it only took a coma to straighten her out. Boy did we laugh real hard with that one.

Of course when my parents went to visit she mentioned that she could not wait to go outside to play in the yard. My Mom looked at her and said she knew where he Son-in-Law gets his fighting attitude. Joan replied that it would kill Ed if something happened to her and she fought for her life for Ed. She has a goal of getting home for Wednesday, Ed's new first chemo day. How cute she is wanting to be there for her boy, they are the cutest of teams. I am so blessed to have them both in my life.

Thanks for listening for this is a major joy in my life and the longest 5 weeks in a long time.>>Believe51

[Believe51]

Today's Joy: It is gorgeous outside, the windows are open and although many things are happening around me......today I am on strike! I am cleaning the house, doing a little of research, but I will not think of anyone else but me.

I feel like singing "Make The World Go Away"....as a matter of fact, that is what I should sing as I finish the housework goals I have set, see I like that....I am making plans as I go. (lol)

Later I will probally play Gameboy for a few hours. Aaaah!! Today is about me!>>Believe51

[Believe51]

Today's Joy: Ed cleaned the bathroon shelves for me while I was engrossed in other projects. Nothing was put back where I had it before and I did not say a word. That is another joy of mine because I am an anal neat freak but have put some of my obsessions aside. I appreciate what he did for me and it does not matter where he put things, I look at the meaning of it instead of the obsessions. Pick and choose you fights....besides, why would he do it again if I complained?? I not dumb much so. (LOL)>>Believe51

[Believe51]

Today's Joy: In order to get things researched today I had to give Mookie some treats, catnip and lots of loving. He is settled by my side like a newborn baby. So I sit here writing and poking around with the most gorgeous Maine Wave kitty near to me. I love it.>>Believe51

[Believe51]

Today's Joy: I took a nap today and had a fabulous dream that I was petting a polar bear under his neck. The dream was so vivid that I could actually remember how soft he was. I woke up in such a warm mood after this simple dream.>>Believe51

[Believe51]

Today's Joy: I think I have found a home for my Mother-in-Law's cat. He is a sweetie and although he will miss her, he will adjust in another loved household. This weighed heavy in ours hearts and now I think he will be adopted!!!

[Believe51]

I cannot believe that I can be the only person out of thousands that experience joy so often. Where is everyone?? My life is pretty much out of control right now and I find joy everyday.

This Weeks Joy's: I found my Mother-in-Laws medallions that she thought were gone for good.

My husband took his first Ixempra treatment.

My father got out of the hospital, yet again. The 18th was his birthday.

I came across a paper in my Mother-in-Laws desk. It was information concerning the Tykerb we needed last year and could not get at the time but eventually did. His Mommy was trying to get him these drugs without a computer, the old fashioned way. I smiled and cried that I miss her already, what a woman. I also found every card we ever sent her, thought I was a pack rat!

I took Ed to lunch and dinner at different occasions and watched him eat.

One of those dinners included watching a special needs adult celebrating her birthday. When they sang 'Happy Birthday' she was screaming in happiness. Almost the entire restaurant clapped for her and there were not too many dry eyes in the house. I had to approach her table to give her my own wishes, she struck my heart and this was a very sad day for me too. She grabbed my hand, held tight and did not want to let go. She looked in my eyes and smiled, she rejoiced with me and shared her happiness once more. Her smile is burned into my mind. I thanked the case workers and explained how I try to see joy everyday and that today, this woman, this stranger made me melt. My entire day was changed for the better.

I survived another day that I did not think I could and today is a much better one.

I have spent alot of time cleaning out my Mother-in-Laws home and keep coming across things that make me smile through the grief.

The chemo nurses remembered Ed's Mom passed and gave us a sympathy card as soon as we entered infusion for the day.

I slept for 12 hours straight just because I wanted to. I normally can meditate myself to sleep with deep concentrating but have been doing it from pure exhaustion.

I seen never before viewed pictures from Mighty Oak's life. I found a double of my favorite ones that I have in my living room. He was on his knees hugging his Border Collie around the neck as Mom sat on the step. I swear he looked exactly like cute little Timmy from Lassie. Precious.

My Mom approached a friend she used to work with in the funeral home. She had Mom G's obit and was going to ask him to laminate them as a favor. He told her, "Oh like these??" He had already done some for us.

I spent alot of time alone lately, partly against my will, Ed is in and out of sleep. This time has been put to good use instead of sadness. I have gotten more things done than I ever thought I could. I have also mourned alone for Mom G and have felt this time has helped me to mourn true. Still got a long way to go but time will heal.

I have my Mother-in-Laws favorite antique lamps adorning my home. One is a dragonfly Tiffany lamp, gorgeous. I have her things placed all over my home and it feels so good to have pieces of her all over.

I have found peace through all of the horrors I have experienced in the last two months. I am not sure how except form God, family and reaching deep down inside of myself. I thank you again for seeing me through one of the toughest parts of my life.

I take one day at a time since getting laid off and feel that I am meant to be at home right now.

I have lost 13 pounds that I have been trying to lose. I stopped weighing myself and focused just on getting and staying in the game. Ed noticed without me telling him so I weighed in and got surprised since it was not coming off at all for so long I put the scale away.

And I still believe!

This thread has always helped me to move forward with smiles and really hope that we can start to post again. I am not the only one with joy and if I can see it through all the fog in my life, you can too. Please, even if you do not post, please see these joys. There are other joys that do not include 'clean scans', we must see them. And I hope that we can share.

Now what is your joy today??

[juanita]

that i got to sleep last night with the help of mirapex for my restless legs!

[Believe51]

Today's Joy: I found a perfect home for my Mother-in-Laws cat, thanks to a love connection from our vets. The gentleman even gave Ed and I visitation rights, (wink and smiling).>>Believe51

[Believe51]

Today's Joy: My Mother-in-Laws house is finished getting moved out. I spent many nights going through her lifetime of memories. It was hard to get rid of things, pass things on....etc. I found many nice surprises though and I really think they were meant for me to stumble across in the process of closing up her life.

Best thing is the gentleman that I have placed her cat with has become a friend. I had an aweful last day at Mom's house as I watched the rest of her antiques and treasures get taken, not sold, by strangers. I cried as I witnessed this and looking around at an empty home. I could not get these thoughts out of my head. It was making me sick today......we had to give them away as part of the cost of removal. She had over $2,500 in curtains that I took home and mannnnny other things that I can share. Mom had both quality and quanity of everything! You cannot imagine the amount of stuff that was there.

But John called and his phone conversation was like Mom sent him to comfort me. John keeps us updated and we are going to get a visitation next week (yeah!!) He really put things into the perspective I needed to rid these thoughts. The cat is safe and loved, he is continuing to get spoiled and that is all Mom would care about. She would laugh at me if she could see how these physical treasures that we 'lost' were bothering me.....then she would tell me that all she cared about was her kitty. I am not a materialistic person, I just wanted to keep everything that was her.

I can now start to mourn. Doing this move was something I could only do but focusing on the task and not the memories. Bittersweet.

[fauxgypsy]

I had good week. I got the results of my Pet scan Monday and it was great. The sub pleural nodule that we have been watching is gone. MRI and MRA tomorrow and I will be able to relax for a while. Happy, happy, happy.

[Believe51]

Great news to hear and share, I guess you could call your results another one of my joys!! Here is to more great results and to much relaxing in the near future. Rock On Fauxgypsy!>>Believe51