chemo/rad follow up, new Onc - reccomendations?

Kimberly Lewis · 03-08-2006, 08:35 AM

I presently have 2 Oncologists. One 2 1/2 hours away at Duke whom I like but find that the wait in the office is another 2 1/2 hours! So an appointment is a whole day ordeal. The other is closer where I get my herceptin every 3 wks, but seems irritated when I ask questions and says rediculous things. ex. when I insisted on a port for herceptin treatment he angrily said "if God had wanted us to have a plastic tube in our vein he would have put one there".... grrrrrrr

The first question is "would it be proper to ask the other Onc at that same clinic (Boone, NC) to take me on or would that be a problem? Is there anyone that lives in this area that has a suggestion? I like the drive to Boone, my second option would be Winston Salem... also I had my last radiation treatment in Dec. 05. Have not had any scans or blood tests since. Should I be insisting on one? From what I read the Tumor markers are unreliable, and scans unnecesary! The only thing reccomended is patient being aware of new lumps, pains etc? This approach is hard to deal with - I do feel abandoned a bit...

madubois63 · 03-08-2006, 09:38 AM

wow - I don't think I would care what's proper. Get a new onc!!! But first - tell your arogant onc that you want him to write that he is 'refusing you a port' in your chart and that you want a copy of it. See how he changes his tune....

Becky · 03-08-2006, 06:24 PM

Dear Kimberly

I do not live in your area but in August, after 10 months, I switched oncologists (and my new onco is one of my old onc's partners). I was very confident in my switch and my new onc is probably the best doctor I will ever have in my life for anything (and I interviewed 5 doctors before picking the deadbeat I had the first time. And.... first onc is my mom's onc). I will say one thing though - the onc I switched from acts like an 8 grade boy who was jilted at the graduation dance. And that's every time I see him which is every 3 weeks in the hall when I go get my herceptin. Sometimes my mom comes with me to keep me company and he will talk to her and not even acknowledge me (not look at me, not say hi, sometimes will even talk loudly at the nurses station so everyone will look at him (including me) and when I look, he looks away). My mom says its because he is embrassed I switched and mad too. This is very annoying to me. And, regardless what people will tell you, it is hard to take. I am done with my year of Herceptin in mid June so it will not be as bad then but I didn't expect this (at least not for so long as I have been with the new onc now 7 months). Like you, I felt I was an annoyance to my first onc with the questions (but he would never talk) and he made MISTAKES - what could have been serious mistakes - 3 different ones. And he couldn't remember anything - nothing at all.

I will say, although I have the best doctor, I probably should have taken alittle time and found another best doctor in another practice (because of how depressing my first onc's behavior towards me is). But my advice is, once you have realized you need to switch doctors, there is no turning back and the situation doesn't get better. I was always saying to myself that the next appointment would be better and then it wasn't and I would be so disappointed and upset that I would go home and cry (and that isn't me at all - ask Maryanne!!!)

Hope this helps

Best regards, Becky

sassy · 03-08-2006, 09:21 PM

Kimberly,

I'm in Mouth of Wilson, VA, four miles from the NC line on route 16. One hour drive from Boone. I did chemo at Wake Forest in Winston (2 1/2 hour drive for me) and would highly recommend them. New cancer center there opened in fall of 04 and is state of the art--was very satisfied with all personnel. I have since transfered to the Wake Forest center at Elkin NC (just a little over an hour drive for me) and am pleased with the onc there. Be happy to give you more info if you like.

Sassy
________
Latnspice

Kimberly Lewis · 03-09-2006, 11:37 AM

Hi - thanks for your responses. I had heard there was a treatment center in Elkin but never could find anyone who had been there. Can you give me the name of your Onc Sassy? In a way I would like to have a woman but don't wan't to be sexist about it. I think Elkin would not be too far for me. I live near Wilkesboro and that is about 45 mins to an hour away I believe. Thanks again.... kim

StephN · 03-09-2006, 12:30 PM

Hi -
I am inflammed to hear these stories of such UNprofessional behavior by these docs. You should really write him up or at the very least let him know you plan to do so (even if he IS your Mom's onc - she can get a new one, and probably SHOULD!).
This childish and unbecoming behavior is off the charts of unprofessionalism.
You have enough to contend with without these AIRHEAD docs!

Anyone reading this who has the least bit of doubt about their treatment team should look around and change - it is YOUR LIFE! You deserve better than these paycheck collectors who don't give a rats ass about the patients.

Jean · 03-09-2006, 04:11 PM

Kimberly,

Good luck with your new onc. I too experienced a bad relationship with my first onc. It is shame - we as patients expect the best from this profession and it can be painfull to discover the person we need the most just is not there for you - in spirit or careful attention to our needs. I interviewed three other oncs and now I am with a top guy who cares and returns calls and answers all questons - never at any time making me feel I am bothering him with my concerns or needs. I also keep a backup onc who I adore also and see every six months to double check on my condition. Good Luck and DON'T waste a second on dumping that onc.

Jean

sassy · 03-09-2006, 08:38 PM

Kim,

Just saw your post after first reply to PM. Have sent you PM, please feel free to
PM or e-mail me if you have questions.
Sassy
________
PROBLEMS FROM PRILOSEC

Becky · 03-09-2006, 09:06 PM

Dear Steph

My husband says the same as you, especially when he drops by to say hi to me during my infusions and the doctor ignores him too. My mom just mentioned to me that she thinks she should switch as it really doesn't matter much to her. She had a textbook "early" detection by mammogram bc case (5mm tumor, 98% ER, 90% PR, Her2 negative, node negative). Had lumpectomy and radiation. Tamoxifen first but switched to Arimidex. She says she considers her internist (who watches her like a hawk) and our radiologist as her real doctors anyway. She only saw this oncologist every 6 months from the very beginning as she has such a "simple" case (if there is one).

At least you have said what only my husband and I have ever discussed, the unprofessional aspect of the situation. At first, during the first hallway encounter, I could understand him being miffed but get over it already. At least it was not just him and me as I know others who have switched from him (but I know others who adore him as well).

Thanks for responding.

Becky

StephN · 03-10-2006, 12:03 AM

... sometimes we have to "call a spade a spade."

Becky, I just can't help but think if the docs act in an unprofessional manner, can they REALLY take our cases seriously, especially those of us with more difficult diagnoses. Would never want to have to ask myself that question, if my disease took a bad turn. I want a doc who is like a good car mechanic, or insurance man - one I can turn to and trust with my problem.

Surely there are some well-regarded med oncs that you can establish a true professional relationship with in your area.

Glad your hubby is caring enough to come see you at the clinic. He is an exception.

Becky · 03-10-2006, 07:39 AM

Steph

I did change oncs in August (to a partner of the first onc) and the new onc is fabulous but I have to put up with the first oncs behavior.

What we (my husband and I) decided to do is either change again after Herceptin (but the new guy is definitely someone who is a great doctor) or 2) my first pissy onc is off on Thursdays so I will make all my appts on Thursdays and after Herceptin is over, I will never have to see him.

Switching is one of the best things I have ever done. I only wish my first onc could get over his embarassment or whatever it is. I also have to get over it too and not let it bother me so much. Thanks for everything.

Becky