Ever fired a doctor?

[jml]

Just wondering...

In 6+ years of this bumpy journey- 92 rounds of chemo, 7 surgeries including a Liver Resection-& multitudes of absurd moments w/insensitive, arrogant, inexperienced, ignorant, naive Dr's/Rn's, I've just fired my (almost) Rad Onc...
I'll spare you all the gory details, but was primarily due to a naive yet arrogant Resident & her insensitive, ignorant comments made during my CT/Sim appt. Afterall, I've been dealing w/this disease longer than she's been in Med School!
I w/out hesitation cancelled my appointment for my 1st rad tx & told them I'd be seeking my care elsewhere.
(Don't get me wrong, I have the utmost respect for my other docs that are part of my TEAM & are responsible for my wonderous survival.)
But, as a sage, salty Stage IV Survivor, I know that I do not need to put up with that kind of treatment from someone I'm supposed to trust (&pay!) with my care, health & life!

Got a story...do tell!

[ElaineM]

I have fired more than one doctor. I am rather independent. Smile. As far as I am concerned I want to work as a team with my doctors. Doctors are not gods. They are human beings and no matter what their specialties are they need to treat people with respect.

[mrsd]

Yes, I guess I fired him or just refused to see him again. When I was intially dx six years ago I went to see him to discuss further treatment. I left that appt more upset and fearful than I care to remember, he was not hopeful and was full of bad stats, lucky me LOL. My friend attended the appt with me and we both came out of the clinic thinking just about the same thing......and we now refer to him as Dr. Doom and Gloom.... I guess he's very good in the field of breast cancer but I prefer my current onc who is compasionate and caring and just a nice person who respects my knowledge of my disease and guides me in my treatment choices rather than tell me what I will be doing............ I guess there are good and bad out there........

[Jackie07]

I've fired a couple of my family doctors in the past 20 years - mainly the ones that did not believe there was a physical explanation of my huge headaches. I did not take one family doctor's advice to use an in-network neurosurgeon who was in no way comparable to the young, Johns Hopkins trained neurosurgeon who did my 25-hour brain surgery.

Usually, the doctor encouraged me to switch before I changed my primary. You can tell their attitude changing when you are diagnosed with a serious illness. Blame HMO, I guess. But without HMO, I would have owed at least 50 K by now.

Oncologists are under tremendous pressure. I like my oncologist. But the first time I did a little bit grapping to the oncology nurse, she asked me if I wanted to switch to another oncologist.

I have an appointment with him next Wednesday. I think I will try to be nice to him and probably brag about my math grade - I had unfairly directed my anger toward him and blamed him for my recurrence as well as my cognitive decline...

I am sure he understands... He'll be nice to me... (Just double checked with my hubby and he told me that the oncologist had put him down one time when he sidetracked from the conversation with a question unrelated to my treatment...)

Two very important men in my life... I think I will keep both of them.

[sassy]

I "fired" my first onc because he only offered platitudes and told me if there was anything I wanted done in the next 10 years, to get it done. He wouldn't discuss anything with me. I left and went to a teaching hospital and they were my "team". Never hesitated to discuss anything and worked with me in all aspects of my treatment.

[sarah]

Yes, I've changed a general practioner because it took him 6 years to pay attention to my yearly (only saw him once a year) complaints about a pain in my neck
and a radiologist who freaked me out when I had my recurrence.
Don't say with a doctor you can't talk to, don't have full confidence in or who doesn't listen
sarah

[Brenda_D]

Maybe not fired, but I did switch GP's in the months before I was dx'ed. I had some problems with a "pinched nerve" under one breast, and a trying time going through menopause. The most my then GP did was tell me I should think about a breast reduction, and put me on a ever more massive dose of prempro.
I quit the prempro on my own, and felt better with the meno symptoms. Of course within a year, I found the lump in the other breast. By then I had changed doctors.

[goops]

I changed doctors too - I never had confidence in my original oncologist - he would keep reordering the same tests over forgetting that I just had it, that pretty much told me he was no reading my file. I am very glad I changed. But in your case if it was someone on the doctor's staff who offended you I think the doctor deserves to know what happened.

[Becky]

I fired my first oncologist. After that, its easy to fire them so I fired my PCP and then my gyne. All due to incompetence, incompetence and arrogance respectively.

If you want details - I'll be happy to moan and groan about it.

[Brenda_D]

Becky, I'd be happy to hear you moan and groan about it.

[BonnieR]

I will not be going back to a GP who told me to "put your worries in a boat and float them down the river". If only it were so easy! I needed more concrete answers since I had been complaining of shoulder pain for months. My new GP ordered an MRI which showed a torn rotator cuff.

[Brenda_D]

Bonnie, my gosh, what is wrong with these doctors? That's pretty bad.

[swimangel72]

I switched oncologists after getting a feeling that mine was telling me white lies to reduce my "anxiety". (This concerned my Onocotype DX score - he originally told me it was "low".......two weeks later, after finding out I was Her2+ he said my score was "intermediate". I had to press the nurse to get the actual number myself.) My old onc had a very kind bedside manner but his office staff were overworked and his head nurse belittled and insulted me on two separate occasions. Also she didn't follow the doctor's instructions (with regard to getting my liver enzymes done ever two weeks) - that coupled with the long drive to their office convinced me to find another oncologist closer to home. I made the switch and have been very happy with everyone - the new onc is a quieter man and seems to be lacking some of the bedside manner, but he's extremely thorough, ordering tests for me that the other onc never did - also the nurses are angels - and their office is only 2 miles down the road which certainly saves on gas considering the fact that I'll be going there every two weeks until next April.

Mentally I told myself I was "switching" oncs.........but when I said goodbye to the old onc, he acted insulted - so he probably knew the truth, that I was "firing" him, lol!

[Bill]

Jamie Lee, we fired an onc. too, that was discussing test results over the phone with Nicola, who was very intelligent and always did her homework, and told her that the answers to the questions she was asking were, "beyond her education level" and in the same conversation told my wife, who was undergoing chemo. that she should not worry about losing weight during the treatments because she "was overweight and could afford to lose a few pounds". We got rid of that onc. and went with another who turned out to be awesome!

[BonnieR]

Oh my goodness Bill! If badges of dishonor are going to be awarded here, I nominate the onc you describe to be the recipient. What he said was unconscionable

[Paris]

Fired my onc. Got tired of the "I've never seen that" response and seeing in his notes that he was "perplexed" regarding my symptoms after chemo. Idiot.

[michka]

Changed Oncs twice. First one wanted to wait one year before starting Herceptine and told me HER2 was a mild form of cancer. Second one did not want to give me Hormonotherapy although I am 90% ER+. When I insisted to understand why, he answered he was not going to give me a medical course.
And I often cried after when I was told that I was the only one suffering from side effects.
I now have a very good Onc. And very human: yes they exist so do not hesitate to change if you do not feel right.
Michka

[jml]

Thank you, everyone for your stories...
The audacity & absurdities that come out of some of these docs is pretty unbelievable!
But all hope & faith is not lost-I just got off the phone w/my SurgOnc - he has been part of my team for 4 years, understands the nuances of my journey w/StageIV disease & I trust him implicitly.
Even though I'm not currently under his direct care, he took the time to review my recent PET, review the consult notes from the RadOnc & offered his opinion.
He said the RadOnc is suggesting the "standard of care" treatment for me, but as we all know, my situation is extremely unusual & we can't just follow the "standard of care." And he's referring me to another RadOnc that "just gets it".
So thank you all, again, for sharing your stories-I was feeling a little uncertain & maybe like I was being hypersensitive, but now feel vindicated & supported in my decision to leave a doc that I knew wasn't the right one for me.
Keep the Faith~

jessica

[Colleens_Husband]

I did fire a doctor once and it was one of the stupidest things I ever have done. The details are sooooooo gruesome they would curl your nostril hairs, so I won't go into it here.

It did teach me a valuable lesson. After that, the next time I was in an emergency room, I was bound and determined to be a model patient and the results certainly paid off.

Spike

[nitewind]

I fired my first onc. He was very cold and the first time that he screamed at me and told me to quit complaining, that was it! I called his partner in desperation one night and he told me to just go to bed, cover up and say my prayers. I never looked back.