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Re: Milestone?
Hi Pam,
Your feelings are validated The hardest part of living in the Stage IV land is the simultaneous celebration of still being alive while grieving the loss of what life looked like before the diagnosis. Of what we did before, what we physically, emotionally, and spiritually felt like before, what our relationships like were before, you name it. Sometimes, I fight the grief and tell myself to appreciate all that I have. One can simultaneousy feel grateful for what one has and yet recognize one's life has forever changed. Never ending treatment is emotionally exhausting. There is no reprieve in cancerland. Please allow yourself permission to feel your feelings, let them come in, and do not judge yourself for feeling the grief.
I respect your transparency and authenticity. So, yes, go buy that nice bubbly spirit. Toast your loved ones who are alongside you and toast to yourself for your authentic spirit. You may cry and smile all at the same time. One can still feel grief and gratitude simultaneously. When I hit my 100, I guarantee I will be crying and laughing all the same time.
Cheers,
Jackie
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10/11 IBC Stage IV; 1 liver met 4.6 cm.
10/11-2/12 TCH for 6 rounds
3/12 Right MRM
5/12-7/12 33 Radiation treatments
8/1/12 Started Perjeta along with the Herceptin
10/12 Scans said NED for first time
5/15 UWSeattle Vaccine Trial 3 months
12/16 Scans still show NED. Herceptin and Perjeta continue indef.
8/17 Taken off Perjeta;staying on Herceptin. Still NEAD.
3/18 Still NEAD
8/19 Now on Subcutaneous Herceptin
10/21 Remain on Subcutaneous Herceptin (Hylecta)
11/21 CT showed possible lung mets. Was told to wait and see until scan
1/22 CT shows continued growth
03/22 Lung Biopsy said sample was too small but nodules keep growing and IR is convinced that it is indeed cancer
04/22 Oncologist referred for consult for a transbronchial biopsy. This does not sound pleasant
Last edited by jacqueline1102; 07-11-2018 at 05:08 PM..
Reason: typos
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