Starting WBR tomorrow...nervous & scared

[Vicky]

Jessica,

I am holding you in my prayers and thinking all kinds of positive thoughts for you! You have so many of us walking this with you, I hope you can take strength from feeling our positive energy and vibes coming your way! Sending lots of light and love!

[Kellennea]

Keeping you in my prayers and sending positive energy your way.

[Jackie07]

Jessica,

Just saw your posting on the Supplement... thread. I'm glad you'd braved your nervousness and reached out to help others.

I remember being 'nervous and scared' before my craniotomy in 1990. It's a natural reaction and seems to be an unavoidable process. It did get better - especially when the procedure is done.

My 2 cents will be to stay as active as possible. Exercise helps stimulate blood circulation which speeds up healing and help the 'synapses' of the brain cells.

Also to stay as happy as possible. Endorphine in our brain does a lot of wonders...

Sending you good vibes.

[sassy]

Jessica,

Hoping those first zaps were mighty destroyers of bad and illuminators of your strength. You have knowledge and know that it is power tinged fear--but hopefully a fear that spurs your adrenalin and girds your inner strength.

Praying your days are good and your nights are peaceful. Keeping you in my heart.

[chemteach]

I hope it went well and you feel good. Chin up, keep going, stay positive, and I like the thought to stay happy from Jackie. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

[jml]

Thank you everyone for your chorus of voices
All your compassion, encouragement & prayers have helped me grab hold of my own confidence and courage to climb on to that table for these first 3 days & know that I only have 12 left to go.
That mask they put on you to hold you're head in place is pretty intimidating - the first day it felt like they were saran wrapping my head to the table! But, with eyes closed & deep breaths (through your nose b/c I can't even seperate my lips) I use your
visual imagery and see those Rads blasting sunlight & healing rays into those dark, lightless areas that I visualize are the mets.
No fatigue yet, but I do think the dexamethasone is making me feel a little buzzy and jittery and which makes a solid, restful night's sleep a challenge. I haven't had
any problems with heartburn or GERD, so I passed on the $200 Rx for Nexium and will just see how I do and maybe opt for something OTC.
Thank you again, everyone. Knowing your prayers surround me have helped in that magical, mystical, faithful way that nothing else can.

Keeping the Faith~

Jessica

[schoolteacher]

Glad to hear from you, Jessica.

Amelia

[StephN]

Today starts another round and, by the end of this week it will be nearly over. Twinkle, twinkle little mets - good bye and good riddance.

Yeah - the decadron is the worst, just when you are leveling out, the next dose kicks in. I drank a lot of the Sleepytime tea.

Lots of good vibes being sent for max effect of this treatment!

[Pray]

Jessica, I'm so glad you posted. I do picture you in that strong stance in your picture here and giving your cancer the what fors! What a wonderful women you are! I want to be just like you~

[JennyB]

Glad to hear from you Jessica,

I sincerely hope the rest of the treatments go smoothly too

Many hugs

Jenny x

[Laurel]

Hey, Jessica, just wondering how you are feeling? Do you have an update on your "zapping?"

Hoping you are doing well and feeling up to letting us know how things are going.

[krisvell]

Hi Jessica;
Jumping in to wish you well. Thinking and praying for you. Did I read you signature correctly - 10 years out. The WBR is just a bump in the road for you. You're awesome! Love,
Kris....

[jml]

Hi Everyone~
Thank you all for being with me through these 15 rounds of WBR.
I finished on Tuesday, Valentine's Day, which was a nice day to celebrate.
And so now the 4 week wait for the follow up MRI begins...

I feel like I tolerated the treatment well - no major fatigue, but I do feel off-kilter from the Decadron. I'm weaning off over the
next 15 days, so I'm sort of waiting to see if as the dose decreases some other side effects will reveal themselves.
I hope not. I'm looking forward to these puffy cheeks to go down and start feeling like myself again.
My hair started falling out at Day 10. It's weird - not like when it falls out from chemo. I just stand in the shower and rub & pluck the hair out of my head. I'm bummed to lose my hair again, just as it was starting to grow back after losing it last August on Halaven.
Losing hair twice in 6mos - that's a new record for me, and a total of 4 times lost now in these 10 years.
At least my eyebrows & eyelashes have come back in and aren't going to fall out.
I'm off to San Francisco and Hawaii for 2 weeks to be with my family and rest and get refocused.
Just want to feel like myself again~

Keeping the Faith~

Jml
Dx-5/17/02 - 33 yo; Stage IV
L IDC w/single liver met
1) Herceptin + Navelbine x 8 weeks - No response; progress to innumerable,immeasureable liver mets
2) ISIS 2504 + Herceptin - 6 mos, partial response
3) Taxol + Herceptin x 13 weeks to NED!
NED for 1 year
9/04 - Single liver lesion recurrence
Taxol + Herceptin - on/off to beat back lesion
12/05 - R Hepatectomy; Liver NED until 2009
3/06- Local recurrence - Left breast, IDC & DCIS, but holding treatment while continue to heal from Hepatectomy.
12/06 - L mastectomy + reconstruction through 8/07
10/07 - Recurrence - supraclav nodes
4) Gemzar + Herceptin - on/off controlling nodes thru
9/08 - 7wks Rads to supraclav nodes
10/08 - Acute Renal Failure - nodes in belly stricturing kidneys. placed permanent ureteral stents
Back on Gemzar + Herceptin, but no longer responding.
5) 05/09 - Tykerb + Xeloda - partial response x 5 mos
6) 10/09 - Xeloda + Herceptin - no response, disease progresses
7) 2/10- Ixempra + Herceptin - partial response x 12 wks.
Discovered single brain lesion x 4mm & liver lesions growing while screening for TDM1 + PI3Kinase study.
6/10 - Novalis to treat brain met - SUCCESSFUL!
8) 6/10 - Chemo-embo w/Adriamyacin to de-bulk liver lesion.
9) 8/10 - Screened & Started TDM1 EAP
Immediate response, disease in belly responds dramatically.
2/11- questionable progression of lung nodules
Discontinue TDM1
10) 3/11 - PI3Kinase + Herceptin - intial good response in 1st 6 weeks but LFT's elevated.
11) 7/11-Discontinue PI3Kinase + Herceptin study;
Disease progression - 2 small lesions in colon – docs have never seen this before in BC
11) 8/11 –Start new combo Halaven+Herceptin
10/14/11 -Completed 3 cycles (9 wks)Halaven+Herceptin...
10/18/11 - Scanxiety time -1st scans since starting this regimen
Good interval response, continue on H+H!
10/25/11 – new 2mm questionable spot in brain? Due to Novalis or new disease?
Re-scan in 8 weeks.
1/3/12- Disease progression; 50%increase size & SUV-R lung, middle lobe 6cm lesion.
R supraclav node multiple, miscellaneous nodes in belly. Colon lesions fired up.
12)Herceptin+ metronomic Cytoxan + Methotrexate.
…on a hope & a prayer. Only chemo I haven’t been on is Taxotere.
Hurry up Pertuzumab & TDM1!
Follow Up Brain Scan on 1/18/12…pleasepleaseplease be okay. I can’t take much more.
1/18/2012- 8 new spots in 8 weeks since last Brain MRI
one 2cm spot in brain stem, one 2cm spot in R temporal lobe.
No symptoms, Thank God
1/25/12 – Start WBR x 15 rounds.
2/10/12 - CYTOXAN WORKING!
US guided biopsy of supraclav node CAN'T FIND IT!
2/14/12 - FINISH 15 rounds WBR

[Sheila]

Jessica
So glad the WBR zaps are done....now for the well deserved R & R...what better place than Hawaii.....prayers for a clean MRI when you return....we are in a race...I too have lost my hair 4x in 10 years, Halaven was the last culprit.....but the eyebrows and lashes are a welcomed perk this time!
Stay Strong!!

[schoolteacher]

Jessica,

Glad you are through with the WBR. Hope you get some rest and have a great vacation with your family.

Amelia

[sarah]

Always scariest just before. Zap those suckers!!!
hugs and love
sarah

[chrisy]

Hi Jessica,
Yes, well earned R&R - and add another R just for luck!

All my love,
Chris

[Kmswilson]

Will be praying for a good MRI for you. I just finished my ninth WBR zap this morning and have four more to go, finishing on 2/22 for the nine spots they found in my last MRI. I've been tolerating okay, but I am extremely exhausted, and the dexamethasone is driving me bonkers. I'm starving, and my sleep is really messed up. After today's zap, the only way I can describe myself is feeling like my brain is a little scrambled. I'm a little woozy and I'm just so, so, so tired. Hopefully, though, these lesions are being zapped away for all of us who are dealing with it! :-)

[Paty]

Jesica,
So happy to hear from you again. Enjoy the time with your family in the coming weeks. Love you!

[alicem]

It's wonderful to hear from you Jessica. I'm glad you tolerated the WBR okay and thrilled that it is over for you. Have a wonderful time with your family in Hawaii. Safe travels. You continue to be in my prayers.

~Alice